27, never been on a date

Need help. Put yourself in my shoes. Wwyd?

>27
>minor autism
>insane parents which have left me severely damaged, trying my best to recover
>ok looks, going to gym for 2 months now.
>5’10
>have job making 96k
>in extremely good financial standing due to living with parents and investing in stocks since I was 19
>have also learned handiwork and remodeled their home
>cook for them as well
>no drinking, no drugs.

I just went grocery shopping the other day and noticed young girls with absolute idiots. Like these guys probably have the iq of a chimp and work some shit paying job and live in the ghetto. I notice this at my gym too.

So what am I doing wrong here? I feel like I have a lot to offer. No women are giving me a chance (not to sound like a neckbeard). Do women not care about having someone dependable that can provide for them and give them a comfortable life?

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Wwyd
    I dunno, go on a date maybe?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      With who? I have no social circle and have had 0 matches from 5 apps

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        you need some friends your age of both sexes

        make it clear you are trying to make friends and making friends is hard for you, and you are requesting their help when you miss social cues.

        **and then don't take offense when they give advice** laugh at yourself, try to incorporate it, and thank them for their candor

        if you're in a strong position financially, you should be paying for group activities. Be generous and be happy to host and pay for things. Don't worry about being taken advantage of financially for petty stuff (under $500). You can afford it, and missing out on socializing is a far bigger threat than not having an extra 5k-10k in your account at the end of the year

        don't start spending crazy right away, but find friends you can watch movies with, go hiking with, do bar crawls with, do service group events with, etc.

        Later, do cool things like renting a boat, going group skydiving, chartering a fishing trip, doing an escape room, dinner theater, etc. Things that are 4-6 hours, not overnight. Make sure money is not an issue for your friends attending vs not attending.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        So? Walk up to some random girl at the conbini, tell her she's cute, and ask if she'd like to sit outside and eat ice cream bars together. Or sit there in your incelitude and be incel.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Also be prepared to get told no over a hundred times. It's not like most people are interested in being with some random dude at a moments notice, it's a numbers game

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Also be prepared to get told no over a hundred times
            lol no I'm not Indian. I'd rather be alone.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >ok looking
        >mildly autistic
        >0 matches on 5 apps

        you must think highly of urself op.

        but real answer to ur question is just repetition. like literally all things in life. git gud.
        go on dates even if it makes u feel uncomfortable.
        eventually they will not be so uncomfortable.
        if ur not getting matches then ur obviously writing some fricking cringe ass shit on ur bio... cuz even ugly dudes can pull [easily; depending on charisma].

        if you actually cared, and ACTUALLY wanted to find a girlfriend you would attempt to do so

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >go on dates even if it makes u feel uncomfortable.
          >eventually they will not be so uncomfortable.
          This is good advice. Dating is a skill that can be practiced, like any other skill. I am mildly autistic as well, but a good friend's older sister - on learning that my inability to deal with women was partly due to having no female sisters or cousins - took pity on me and set out to teach me the basics of interaction with the opposite sex, culminating in several practice dates (no practice coitus though). That enabled me to successfully talk to women, enabling me to make it to the dating stage with several, and a few years later I was happily married and having regular non-practice coitus.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Tfw you found a practice misaki irl, lucky bastard.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            How do you practice dating if no one wants to go out with you?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            If you get 0 matches on 5 dating apps, you must be doing something wrong. How long did you use them for, it could take some time. Can you post a screenshot of your bio? That's the easiest to fix

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >If you get 0 matches on 5 dating apps, you must be doing something wrong.
            Nta you underestimate how bad it is for the average guy

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >If you get 0 matches on 5 dating apps, you must be doing something wrong.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Woman thinks getting swamped with 100s of matches per week is how men experience dating apps, too
            kek

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            He should try this guy's bio, it seems to work pretty well.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I think dating apps are a lost cause for numerous reasons but if that’s your preferred method of casting your net, I can comprehend why it’s an attractive option. It’s lazy, right at ur finger tips, easy to deal with rejection (because u never see it happen) u can pay a small fee to make your time alittle more optimized, feels like the power or onus is on u, etc etc. Anyways, I can understand why it seems like a good option, but I’d recommend just growing a pair and socialize with real life people in ur general vicinity. And if ur a shut in neet then u probably got a lot to fix on urself before u should even think about dating to begin with…

            I know that sounds like a tall order, going from UNABLE TO SOCIALIZE to jus flirting with girls irl but that’s where the repetition comes in. It’s not suppose to be easy day 1. U just slowly grind til and refine ur mastery with every small experience.

            If ur insistent on doing the dating apps then at least put some thought into ur dating app profile. If ur not getting swipes you’re probably coming off fricking cringe n moronic. Cuz u can still be ugly and still find plenty of girls to wanna frick u

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    they want someone they can have fun with. you sound a bit boring, no offense. what's your social circle like? do you have a lot of friends you go out and do stuff (bars, concerts, organized sports/hobbies) with?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Not op, I am 30 and never been on a date either. Never had any friends and I have never been to a bar, concert or had any hobbies outside my home.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Maybe go outside
        Not even to a bar of you dont want, I library, arcade, whatever you're into and just get used to meeting people

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          How do you meet people anywhere? I have nothing to say to anybody

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Just say hi, sometimes they'll talk back, if they don't, move on. It's not as scary as you think

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Say hi and then just stand there staring at them after they say hi back? I have never had even acquaintances, I don't know how the frick people converse or make friends.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Talk about the fricking weather if you have to. Once you get used to it or won't be so hard

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        they're not going to randomly knock on your door, anon. you have to go talk to people in order to get a girlfriend.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I know but I have nothing to say. I could say hi to someone but that's it then.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            talk to them about your hobbies. maybe you'll have one or two in common.

            Just say hi, sometimes they'll talk back, if they don't, move on. It's not as scary as you think

            >It's not as scary as you think
            absolutely this

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >hi
            >hey
            >i watch anime and read comics
            >what the frick
            I'm not trying to be difficult or undermine your advices, but I need clear instructions because it's like an another language

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            well, don't take offense to this, but how exactly did you get to 30 years old without being able to perform basic social interaction? do you just get every meal delivered and basically live online?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >get bullied in primary school
            >stay at home and never interact with people
            >don't go to high school
            That's about it. My parents moved to a smaller apartment so I needed to move too so I have lived alone on benefits for a decade now. Just go to the corner store to get food once a week and watch shows.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            We understand it's scary. My first date I just walked up to a girl at a museum and just started talking about random shit.
            I was nervous but just kept going with it.
            It didn't work out and she stopped texting me, but after the first time I was less scared to go out and meet someone again

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            are you disabled? how are you getting benefits? at any rate, i think it would behoove you to find someone in a similar situation. that might be your best bet for companionship.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            No, just unemployed. I don't know where to find any people. I function even worse online, because I find people are even more scary since you can't really see them etc. Never had online friends either because I fear they will hurt me, I can't trust anyone to even know my username.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            you've had an entire conversation with me, a total stranger, so don't discount yourself from being able to do so.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            It's different being completely anonymous, if there were usernames or avatars or anything it wouldn't work at all. I shut down if there is some way of connecting me with something else. I am a bit afraid of sharing info even here since it might be connected and someone from other thread might go "there he is"

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I don't know what kind of stupid autism is this, but I have it too.
            I don't even understand why I care, it's idiotic if you logically think about it.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            It is idiotic, sorry you have it too. I don't understand why it is so impossible for me to talk to people online in a more social way, even when I see people do it all the time without any problems. My brothers have hundreds of online friends, they make them constantly on games etc. And I don't get it. They don't even talk to people, just play the game and suddenly they have requests and it goes from there. I play with them, I am as good and still nothing. I do the exact same thing in the same servers.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >well, don't take offense to this, but how exactly did you get to 30 years old without being able to perform basic social interaction? do you just get every meal delivered and basically live online?
            Well that's the easy part. Minmaxxing on int allows some very high paying fields which allows you to basically never leave your home. Of course you'll never get to increase your social skills that way

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Sadly I have low int also but have my country's unemployment benefits that allow me to live like this.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            That's a thing too of course, not everyone is blessed with a gift even when disabled. You live in some nordic country? Even being ideologically unemployed is fine there

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            If I were trying this shit I'd start by going to places where: A. I have a reason to be there outside of skirt chasing, and B. Extroverted women are also there.
            I'd say shit like "I'm trying to find cool people to hang out with, wanna <activity>?" And then I'd be like "So what do you like to do for fun?" and "What do you like to see in a <my sex>"?
            That's assuming I'm not being an apex degenerate, and doing the IRL equivalent of "Your avatar is hot, you here for ERP? ... What are your kinks?"

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I can solve your problem, you just need to send me $1200.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    First thing's first: you gotta be careful around hoes, because I can tell you right now a gold digger is gonna see a romantically naive man who's loaded with money and she's gonna come in, seduce you, ruin your life, and leave. You gotta hide your wealth from anyone you date and be super careful about how much you spend on dates and stuff. Hopefully you already know this.
    Now as far as getting a date, it's actively hurting you that you have no friends. A really easy way for a woman to figure out a guy's worth is see: what do other women think about him? Women chase after guys who already have a gf because she can clearly see: something about that guy is worth dating if he already has a gf. And the prettier his gf is, the more valuable he must be. You mentioned the chimps you see at the grocery store and unfortunately women are gonna look at those guys, see their gfs, and assume something about him must be really good. If you're single, and even worse if you have no female friends, and even worse than that if you have no friends period, then the girl is gonna see all of these things as red flags and they're not even gonna give you a chance.
    So your goal right now should be to make some friends I think, and take some pictures with those friends (and eventually with girls too) so that you can show them on your dating app profile and so a girl looking at those pics will see that you are socially active and people like being around you. And you should aim to do the same in public, go to the gym with friends or grocery shopping with friends or something and just be seen, by other people, with other people. This should start to open up more opportunities for you

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      solid advice

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >insane parents which have left me severely damaged, trying my best to recover
    you've been an adult since age of 18. Don't put your failures on other people. Part of being an adult is accounting for yourself. Self-actualize and fix your problems that you know you need to address.
    >in extremely good financial standing due to living with parents and investing in stocks since I was 19
    its time to move out! Should have done it the moment you had a good income coming in. Don't be a burden to your family. Move out and let them live their lives, you leech. Work on this first, get your basics fixed. No wonder you're having difficulty dating.
    >noticed young girls with absolute idiots
    calm down Prince Charming. You don't even have your own home and live with your mom. You are in no position to criticize. Women don't owe you anything either, you entitled weirdo.
    >So what am I doing wrong here?
    Get off your high horse first of all. You have a job and some skills like everyone else- it doesn't make you special. If anything, you are behind because you don't live and support yourself. You literally stay with your mom's. Fix your basics first before you start thinking about and comparing yourself to other people.
    >I feel like I have a lot to offer.
    You have a douchebag attitude. You expect people and women to treat you differently when in reality, NO ONE OWES YOU SHIT. You can't force people to like you just because you think you've checked-off a few milestones in life. You actually have to be a decent human being first.
    >Do women not care about having someone dependable that can provide for them and give them a comfortable life?
    They do, but not with your entitled ass. Take a month and do nothing but think about where you are at in life and honestly assess yourself if that's where you think your best life would be currently. If not, make some moves. Worry about a date and women later because you don't even have your basics down and wonder why you feel autistic.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Ok, what makes someone a decent human being? How do I become liked?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >Ok, what makes someone a decent human being? How do I become liked?
        How about fix your basics like I said? Being down to earth means understanding other people on the base level. So being able to care for yourself by living on your own is a start. People can see through your lies that you live with your mom or you are not standing on your two feet. Women are especially sharp on detecting that. If you aren't even CONGRUENT with how you live your life and what you think, people see right through you. Second, try curtailing your expectations. Realize all that you said are normal for adults today. To have a good paying job, to have skills- even women today have it like that. So what makes you different? Be real and be humble. If you think women owe you pussy just for having that, you have much to learn about life. No one owes you anything. You have to make an effort in life to meet and be with people.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What job do you do?

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Set a budget that is reasonable literally just to invite people on dates and out to talk and focus on talking to them and reading their body language. Consider every expenditure a sunk cost and a learning opportunity, do not expect any relationships or results from these engagements. Learn as much as you can and accept the people for who they are as people. Try to empty yourself from the conversations and pretend you're a vacant glass that's just absorbing them and their energy. There will always be time to worry about yourself and your own thoughts later.

    Right now you're too focused on your own thoughts, your own position, what you did wrong or right, and how you compare to other people. You're not in a position to learn and grow. While you're having conversations a portion of your brain will be focused on what to say next and how to contribute to the conversation to make yourself look good or impress upon the other person your value, your intelligence, your merit, etc.

    I promise 100% that you'll make way more effective use of your time by focusing on them and putting all your energy and focus on them and how they're feeling/reacting in the conversations. You can go too far with the focus, but if you're actually focused on them you should be able to read them getting uncomfortable and you'll be able to pull back a bit. Don't just ask them questions like an interview either, read their energy and literally just engage with their conversation wherever it leads. Your goal is just to gain skill at reading people and comfort in conversations.

    I've deliberately not mentioned anything about the moron men. They don't matter and they shouldn't matter to you either. Attacking them is pretty much always going to be a negative for you and there's no reason to engage in it.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    guys probably have the iq of a chimp and work some shit paying job and live in the ghetto
    It's cause blacks aren't judged as harshly by women

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    do you approach women or do online dating?
    You sound like a "nice guy". Despite women saying they like nice guys, they dont. They want a man that doesnt give a frick. Because to women that means he must be better than me. You have to become more wienery, flirty, not needy, not give a frick. Go on dates and try to act like you are there only to have a good time. DO NOT act need or try to be a woman pleaser. Women see this as weakness.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >>no drinking, no drugs.
    This was also me when I was a virgin

    Also 19 year old girls don't care about financial stability, they want to go out and party or stay in and party. Especially those girls specifically you saw that day, "the hot chick".

    That said, even alternative film nerd girls and goth gfs like to go out to events and small concerts.

    It sounds like you're also just a work/gym/home kinda guy with no social hobbies?

    There's also online dating, but that's a whole other post.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >19 year old girls don't care about financial stability
      The ones who aren't party girls do. However, being 19 and dumb, they're easily impressed. Your job at Home Depot may be enough to wow them.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    the modern world has made us categorize dating into its own distinct realm of social interaction, but this is unnatural and you shouldn't see it that way. Meeting people, making friends, talking to girls, fricking, falling in love, they are all part of human socialising, they don't each need their own strategy or app. Sure you tick a lot of boxes on paper, but you need to socialise more to capitalise on that. If you want to meet a partner it would be a good idea to increase how much you're socialising in a very broad sense, talk to lots of people, men women and children, young and old, whoever is around. You're only going to improve by practise.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >the modern world has made us categorize dating into its own distinct realm of social interaction, but this is unnatural and you shouldn't see it that way. Meeting people, making friends, talking to girls, fricking, falling in love, they are all part of human socialising, they don't each need their own strategy or app.
      This is the most correct thing said in this thread.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        nah hes unoptimized. cringe

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >no drinking, no drugs.
    Unless you're a genuine addict most girls will not give two shits about these things.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    You sound like a supreme gentleman. I have no idea why women wouldn't like you.

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >So what am I doing wrong here? I feel like I have a lot to offer.
    You have a lot to offer but you have not offered it. You talk about your qualities, but the moronic idiot dating the girl in the grocery store actually took a shot and asked her out, made it known he wanted a relationship with her.

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