Am I selfish for wanting sex with my boyfriend

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about 8 months in total and we have not had sex yet. We are in our mid-late 20s. I’ve brought it up many times and he says he wants to but gets nervous. We agreed to take things slow in the beginning but is this too slow? We’ve talked about going all the way for months now. It’s definitely been affecting my mood overall and really stressful. He will talk to me sexually over text saying what he wants to do the next time I’m over but doesn’t. I recently had to ask him to stop and explained why. He was understanding and didn’t realize it was frustrating, even though I’ve expressed being ready and wanting to for about 4 months. He even agrees that he’s ready and will next time I’m over. Whenever I bring it up, if it’s over text he usually sends the eye roll emoji, when in person he gets quiet or says its his nerves. He’s explained why, but I don’t know if it’s the full truth. He doesn’t think he needs therapy but I’m not sure how much longer I go on. On top of that, he snores and I don’t get any sleep when I’m over, and one of us ends up going to the couch. We’ve tried many drug store solutions but he refuses to get it checked out. Everything else in the relationship is really good and it’s making me feel selfish for thinking about ending the relationship.

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Do you both exist in your own physical bodies?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      are you high?

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'm trans btw, idk if that matters
    Captcha: xgayx

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    have you considered making the first move? or initiating yourself if that's what you want?

    I know... I know... I might as well have hit you in the face for even suggesting as much! I'm sorry.

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    If you're independent beings, then just leave.
    Guy won't get horny for you, red flag.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    He's definitely gay. You need BBC stat

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >hes gay
      >”he has an issue with sex which means he craves wiener in his mouth!
      >he wants wiener!”
      That’s how moronic you sound

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    don't feel selfish. your sexual needs not only aren't being met, but he is blatantly unclear in his communication and unwilling to level with you or work with you. i think an ultimatum may be appropriate here. "i understand that you aren't comfortable or willing to have sex at the moment. it's ok to not want to have sex, but the lack of communication and mixed signals are not ok. i'm willing to take things at your pace if we can see a therapist (couples therapist and/or sex therapist) but if that is not something you're interested in, i'm afraid this relationship isn't healthy for either of us."

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    He is hiding something. Could be a lot of things : small dick, can't get hard, afraid to disappoint you, extremely low libido, depression, low testosterone, etc. You have to talk to him. Communication is your only answer here. If he refuses to talk to you, leave. You're both wasting time.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Your the reason people like him him are so worried about themselves homosexualt. Stop talking shit about some body you don't know he's probably all ways thinking about how the anon on NSFFW made a big deal about how bad they want a huge wiener and a man who can blow a load of hot cum on command XD

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >anons on NSFFW talking about how they want huge wieners and hot cum
        I don't get how that messes with your relationship

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Are you 12, a Black person or is your IQ lower than your anal temperature ? I guess it's all three because you didn't understand at all what I said, homosexual. Go back.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >hiding something
      Such bs

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You want sex and he doesn’t. You are young and it’s normal lol. Probably a deal breaker unless he sorts it out.

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    How fat are you?

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Idk..are you hot? post a selfie

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Two questions:
    1. How fat are you?
    2. How rich are your parents?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      1. I'm not even that fat dumbass. I'm 5'3" 165 lbs. Literally skinnier than so many other girls I see.
      2. They're doing really well. They both have cars that were made in the late 2000s and we lived in a double wide trailer so we were pretty rich tbh. But then again why does this even matter????

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        OP here, this person isn't me.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Then what's your real height and weight? Maybe it's time to cut your losses or just cut weight.

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    BOOBS WANT BOOBS

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    he is a transman

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Suck his dick and see his reaction.

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You shouldn't be having sex outside of marriage, but that aside, it's only selfish if you get to the point of manipulation despite knowing what your bf wants. Since he hasn't given you a firm condition (like marriage) for sex, you practically have to keep asking him where he stands.
    Wanting something your bf/gf doesn't isn't necessarily selfish (though some things are intrinsically selfish, like getting off to degrading or humiliating others), but it is a point of incompatibility. If it's important to you and can't be negotiated, then breaking up is reasonable.
    Frankly, I agree with the other anons. It sounds like your bf has a serious issue. If he were just waiting until marriage, I'd side with him, but from the way you describe it, he's not holding back out of moral reasons, which makes me think of some kind of insecurity or hangup.

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It’s because he is from Minnesota

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >I’ve expressed being ready and wanting to for about 4 months
    that's exactly how long you've wasted spending any time or energy on this stubborn idiot
    he is putting up a wall and at this point must be consciously neglecting your concerns
    move on, you can do better, don't let anyone waste your life like this

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >breaking up over sex
      moronic

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >staying in a fundamentally unhappy relationship
        megamoronic
        unless this guy is a cuck this one can't last, chief

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Things can happen where sex goes away unexpectedly. Would you just leave a good relationship because something happens to the sex?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >sex goes away unexpectedly
            after EIGHT MONTHS the guy is refusing sex
            after the third time OP should have monkey branched his ass

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            That’s stupid. Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. The OP already said the relationship is great. Sex is the only issue. Why ruin something that is overall good

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            you can't have a burger without the buns, mack
            filling is good but it's not enough on its own

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I would honestly prefer burger without buns. So kinda bad analogy

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >you can’t have a burger without buns
            Yes you can.. people on a cut do it all the time

            holy cuck mentality, batman
            move on

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Maybe one day you’ll have a problem where you can’t have sex anymore, and your partner will leave you just because of it

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >you can’t have a burger without buns
            Yes you can.. people on a cut do it all the time

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        That’s stupid. Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. The OP already said the relationship is great. Sex is the only issue. Why ruin something that is overall good

        This man is right. Sex is disgusting.

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Huh. Usually it's the guy who gets blue balled by the woman. Have you tried rubbing your butt on his dick while he's gaming or whatever.

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You said he had no problem sexting but has a problem actually being physically intimate? Maybe he’s more interested in the mental part. Ask him if he’s into hypnosis. Idk what reason he gave you but it could also be traumatizing if he’s been sexually assaulted in the past. Maybe he’s religious and that’s why he keeps putting it off, unsure of whether to do it before marriage or not? Maybe he’s just… gay? Or ace? I don’t think it’s necessarily selfish for you to want it if he’s been blue balling you for months. This reminds me of King Louie who wouldn’t have sex with his wife for several years and it was a huge deal because they needed an heir and I think he had some sort of physical disorder. If he’s not going to meet your terms for the relationship… at some point… then well… I mean how long do you want to be in this sexless relationship for?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >gay
      Why do you automatically assume a man likes wiener because he’s nervous to have sex
      >asexual
      That’s not a real thing

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >being physically intimate? Maybe he’s more interested in the mental part. Ask him if he’s into hypnosis. Idk what reason he gave you but it could also be traumatizing if he’s been sexually assaulted in the past. Maybe he’s religious and that’s why he keeps putting it off, unsure of whether to do it before marriage or not? Maybe he’s just… gay? Or ace?

      or maybe he doesn't want?

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    A man who doesn't want to have sex with his woman is probably gay.

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    is it physiologically impossible for women to be assertive?

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Listen
    You love him and he loves you back, you want to go all the way and he agrees to do so but he clearly has performance anxiety or some kind of insecurity
    You have his consent, be assertive but also caring and understanding and try to start the act yourself.

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Spend more time naked together. Even during the day while walking around at home. jerk off next to him to make him horny.

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