girlfriend told me shes asexual and that sex was a chore for her, why would she have sex with me in the first place?

girlfriend told me shes asexual and that sex was a chore for her, why would she have sex with me in the first place?

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    She's gaining something from you.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      gaining what?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I don't know, maybe she wants you to stay with her so she's sacrificing her """asexuality"""" in exchange for your satisfaction. Although why she would tell you she's an asexual, idk.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          shes lied to me before about being turned on by me so i guess it explains that. how do i fix her

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >how do i fix her
            Uh, you don't.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            i love her a lot and i would do anything for her but sex is important to me, this isnt something we can compromise

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            You have two values that you have. Sex or love for her. Let's assume she doesn't want to have sex anymore. What do you value more? Also, don't forget there are women who will provide both.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            ill fix her

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            You can't fix her.

            You have 2 paths.

            A path forward with her where sex is always going to be a point of contention and discomfort for her, a chore and one that leaves neither of you fully satisfied.

            Or a path forward without her as a romantic partner where you are free to explore relationships with women who are able to satisfy your emotional AND physical needs, and she is able to find a like-minded partner.

            There is no deviation from those paths, which do you choose?

            Not trying to be an butthole here, but you sound young and inexperienced. Breakups suck, but they're often the kind alternative to a lifetime of discontent resentment. You can't "fix" someone, they need to want to be better and work for it. Nothing you do, no matter how perfect it is or how incredibly you do it, will change them if they don't put the effort into changing.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >i love her a lot and i would do anything for her

            Obviously not. You wouldn't do something as simple as stop having sex, for example.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            i can

            Your relationship will have worse problems than sexlessness.

            like what

            But you are convenient. As she is convenient for you. If my girl told me that bullshit, I'd let her go.

            how

            You can't fix her.

            You have 2 paths.

            A path forward with her where sex is always going to be a point of contention and discomfort for her, a chore and one that leaves neither of you fully satisfied.

            Or a path forward without her as a romantic partner where you are free to explore relationships with women who are able to satisfy your emotional AND physical needs, and she is able to find a like-minded partner.

            There is no deviation from those paths, which do you choose?

            Not trying to be an butthole here, but you sound young and inexperienced. Breakups suck, but they're often the kind alternative to a lifetime of discontent resentment. You can't "fix" someone, they need to want to be better and work for it. Nothing you do, no matter how perfect it is or how incredibly you do it, will change them if they don't put the effort into changing.

            im 30

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            How what? How about being convenient or how as in letting her go?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >i can

            Then why make the thread? You shouldn't use the world "love" so loosely. It has no meaning anymore. It simply means sexual attraction or desire for affection to you. You don't love her, you desire her.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        attention
        affection
        validation
        money

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          she could get that anywhere else and im a wagie

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            But you are convenient. As she is convenient for you. If my girl told me that bullshit, I'd let her go.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >why would she have sex with me in the first place?
    As an asexual man, because it's expected of you. Maybe she didn't realize that she was asexual or maybe she thought that if she had sex she'd enjoy it. Being asexual sucks ass so bad because it reduces your dating market by 99%. I would much rather be an asexual woman than an asexual man though because at least she CAN have sex. All she has to do is lie there and maybe use some lube but as a guy I can't get it up so I physically can't have sex.

    The asexual community hates it when I say this, but asexual woman absolutely can have sex even if they don't want to/enjoy it. If my dick was perpetually hard I'd have no problem letting my girlfriend ride it even if I got no enjoyment out of it but unfortunately I was cursed to be both asexual and a man so I'm doomed to be alone for the rest of my life.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Not OP but damn man. One of my best friends is asexual and hinted at problems like these. I hope life is treating you well besides all that

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Thanks, man.

        Being "asexual" is actually real? Does it just mean you have low libido or you have absolutely no concept of physical attraction to the opposite sex? Is there a way to make myself asexual?

        I actually do watch porn and can get off to it. But that's fantasy. I don't actually want to have sex. The idea of having sex disgusts me. The best analogy I can come up with is I like the Amazon rain forest. I would love to watch a documentary about the Amazon rain forest but I would NOT want to visit the Amazon rain forest in real life. I don't want to sleep on the hard ground. I don't want to have to worry about poisonous snakes, or have to deal with all the insects and God knows what other horrible things that are living there. I can enjoy and appreciate the Amazon rain forest through a screen just fine, thank you!

        When I watch porn I don't self-insert. I just get off from the visuals and the idea of sex itself. If I could step through my screen and frick the girl myself I wouldn't want to.

        Being "asexual" is actually real? Does it just mean you have low libido or you have absolutely no concept of physical attraction to the opposite sex? Is there a way to make myself asexual?

        >Being "asexual" is actually real?
        Yes it's real but it's a spectrum. Some asexuals watch porn, others don't. Some have sex and others don't. Some asexuals are completely repulsed by even the idea of sex and find porn as disgusting as watching maggots consume a dead body. Some asexuals are just completely apathetic and don't care either way, just like you (hopefully) aren't turned on by the idea of fricking a giraffe and don't think much when you see two giraffes fricking on Animal Planet.

        Being "asexual" is actually real? Does it just mean you have low libido or you have absolutely no concept of physical attraction to the opposite sex? Is there a way to make myself asexual?

        >Does it just mean you have low libido or you have absolutely no concept of physical attraction to the opposite sex?
        I've never been attracted to anyone in my life. A 10/10 woman could walk into my room naked and it wouldn't do anything for me.

        Being "asexual" is actually real? Does it just mean you have low libido or you have absolutely no concept of physical attraction to the opposite sex? Is there a way to make myself asexual?

        >Is there a way to make myself asexual?
        The only asexuals I know that "became" that way is because they fricked up their sexuality to the point where they don't find humans attractive anymore. It's not common but you'll find some of these people in the furry community. Most furries are attracted to furry shit and humans but some go off the deep end and lose attraction to humans.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Being "asexual" is actually real? Does it just mean you have low libido or you have absolutely no concept of physical attraction to the opposite sex? Is there a way to make myself asexual?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It's a symptom of autism. Usually low libido coupled with no concept of physical attraction

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      if you are able to get erect somehow, do you derive pleasure from having your dick stimulated?

      I always assumed asexual people who had sex just did so for the feeling of closeness rather than the sexual aspect. I'm not asexual, but I would be fine with an asexual partner if she liked to cuddle naked, i've always been more concerned about the connection and physically being inside someone is the closest you can get to them

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >if you are able to get erect somehow, do you derive pleasure from having your dick stimulated?
        Oh yes. Sexual arousal and physical pleasure are two entirely different things. If you're straight I guarantee you that it would physically feel good to frick some guy's butthole even though you'd be disgusted. Imagine if you're with this girl. She ties you down and blindfolds you, then tells you she's going to put your wiener in her ass and ride it. Unbeknownst to you, a guy comes in while you're blindfolded and rides you instead. You think it's the woman so you enjoy it. Only after you realize you just fricked some guy in the ass do you become disgusted but the physical pleasure you felt from it was real.

        >I always assumed asexual people who had sex just did so for the feeling of closeness rather than the sexual aspect.
        I wouldn't know as the idea of having sex repulses me but there are asexuals that have sex and enjoy it just because of the physical sensation or the feelings of closeness as you described.

        Asexuality is not a "thing"/mental condition/type of sexuality.

        It's a symptom of a metabolic disorder and can be fixed with diet, exercise, becoming fit and healthy, and meeting a hot enough mate.

        >Asexuality is not a "thing"/mental condition/type of sexuality.
        False. I've literally never been attracted to anyone in my life. I'm no more attracted to a hot woman than I am to a tree.

        So if you watch porn you literally can't get hard? Do you ever cum?

        >So if you watch porn you literally can't get hard? Do you ever cum?
        No, I can get hard and cum from porn. I just don't want to have sex with anyone.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          If you're not attracted to anyone then how do you pick a gf?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >If you're not attracted to anyone then how do you pick a gf?
            I don't. I've never had a girlfriend and I don't want one.

            Your impotence is fueling your false beliefs of being asexual. Fix the health issues, mental/chemical/physical, regarding the erection block and you'll find yourself a normal man.

            >Your impotence
            False. I can get it up just fine and I jerk off to porn. It has nothing to do with impotence or the equipment not working. It has to do with me not being attracted to people or wanting to have sex in real life.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >as a guy I can't get it up so I physically can't have sex
            That's from the post I quoted and is the definition of impotence. Suddenly you have no issues getting an erection. You're already lying to strangers on the internet in the first interaction with them so I'd work on the character issues causing that before figuring out why your dick doesn't work right. As a note, most asexuals were sexually abused as kids, often times by family members. If no memory of this exists, often it happens as infants with little more than a primal aversion to sexuality remaining which you don't have since you use porn to overcome your "asexuality". I'd argue you're a porn addict who developed sexual performance issues more than anything else.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >That's from the post I quoted and is the definition of impotence.
            I can't get it up to a real woman in order to have sex because I don't want to have sex. In fact, the idea of having sex disgusts me. Could you get it up while watching maggots consume a dead body? My dick works just fine. I just can't get it up to the idea of having sex in real life. Not only am I completely disgusted by the idea of all the fluids and sweat and shit and by the thought of being physically close to someone like that, I'm not attracted to people in real life, so there's no way I could get it up in order to have sex. Just because you don't understand asexuality doesn't mean it isn't a real sexuality or that people are lying about being asexual.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >No, I can get hard and cum from porn. I just don't want to have sex with anyone.
          bro ur literally just porn damaged and mentally ill
          quit porn asap and therapy

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Wrong. I've never been attracted to anyone in my life. Porn didn't make me lose my attraction to people. I've never had it. I thought it was so weird when all the guys in school started checking out girls and asking me which girls I liked or pointed out girls they found hot. I've never had those feelings for anyone. My best friend asked admitted her feelings for me and I shot her down because I didn't want to have sex with her or anyone else. I liked her a lot but I had never even thought about having sex with her before and when she brought it up it was a major ick moment for me.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >I've literally never been attracted to anyone in my life
          It's a symptom of a metabolic disorder and can be fixed with diet, exercise, becoming fit and healthy, and meeting a hot enough mate.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Asexuality is not a "thing"/mental condition/type of sexuality.

      It's a symptom of a metabolic disorder and can be fixed with diet, exercise, becoming fit and healthy, and meeting a hot enough mate.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        P.S. Or it's a lie, see

        not asexual for chad i reckon

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      So if you watch porn you literally can't get hard? Do you ever cum?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Your impotence is fueling your false beliefs of being asexual. Fix the health issues, mental/chemical/physical, regarding the erection block and you'll find yourself a normal man.

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    not asexual for chad i reckon

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      cringe animeposter not everything is like your cucking fetish animes

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        NTA but it's not out of the realm of possibility.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Asexuality isn’t real, anon. Just another edgy zoomer word. In other words, it’s not her it’s you. She didn’t like sex with you.

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Its called "locking down a simp for material security"

    Women don't like sex on the whole. Its just a way to control you for money.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      she makes more than me and never asks me for money

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Your relationship will have worse problems than sexlessness.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >why would she have sex with me in the first place?
    Tons of women are not asexual and have a miserable time fricking their husbands/bfs anyway. They frick them to make them happy. They want to be good gfs/wives so they "put up with it". A lot of women are taught that they're bawds or "impure" for jerking off so there's a lot of hang up on that too.
    And when they can jerk off, most tend to shy away from actually talking about having their needs met sexually, either because they don't communicate or because their partners aren't open to that communication.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Bro listen to me.

    THAT IS A SIGN YOU NEED TO BREAK UP

    IT IS ABOUT TO END

    GET OUT NOW ON YOUR TERM

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Let's clear it up, she's not asexual. She's just no longer attracted to you. That's all there is to it. The whole asexual thing is complete bullshit.

    I guess it could be she's suffering from depression or some such shit, but the reality is, it comes down to her not feeling aroused by you.

    So what do you do? You could dump her and find someone else. If she's not putting out, start openly flirting with younger, hotter women when you're out together. Will it piss her off? Yep. Will she realize that bouncing off your dick to keep you from straying isn't the worst thing? Yep.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Jesus christ please don’t believe anyone in this thread. Asexuality is a real thing, not wanting to have sex truly is not that radical of a preference. Her having sex with you before could be due to a bunch of things (feeling obligated, not wanting to let you down, etc) and i know it must hurt to feel rejected, but her telling you that means she’s comfortable enough to, which is great. I’d have a talk with her about it instead of the inbred cesspit that is this website

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      You are a liar.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Turned a girl asexual
    Damn bro, how did you even manage that?

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Get her to do a mitosis, then the clone can have sex with you for her, and then get the clone to do a mitosis, and you can have a threesome.

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