How long should you wait to get to know someone before having sex with them?

How long should you wait to get to know someone before having sex with them?

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 8 months and still no sex. We'll wait for probably few more months and then we'll do it.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      oof

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Three dates, unless you are a homosexual in denial dating a woman.

      By that metric, these are certainly huge gays:

      until marriage?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Marriage

        >if you prioritize commitment, you're le gay
        Literal homosexuals tend to be promiscuous, just like you.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    whenever you two feel comfortable with doing it. simple fricking answer homosexual, god i hate these threads

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    15-20 minutes

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I arguably did this once though I didn't realize it at the time. I had known the girl for a while but never really had a conversation with her. We had a mutual friend who talked a lot, and one day the mutual friend went home early and left us sitting at the bar together. She invited herself over almost immediately.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Interestingly when my wife and I were first dating she hit it off with this girl and they were best buds, but then she blew a gasket when she found out homegirl was still flirting with me. After a while they patched things up and the girl would come over and hang out. Then the two of them started having sex after I fell asleep. I have no idea how many times this happened, probably just once or twice, but my wife is a liar so who the frick knows? I like to think it happened pretty often.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    until marriage?

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    0 sec - 2 months imo

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    4-6 months so you know you aren't being used as a rebound

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      ok that's what i figured, but my problem is, no one will stick it out with me. I've had one girl wait like 3 months but all the others were out before i could really explain that i wanted to wait a little longer. how do you find girls that will wait 6 months?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        That's what I worry about too, most people seem to be use to moving really fast.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        That's what I worry about too, most people seem to be use to moving really fast.

        If you guys are just waiting an arbitrary length of time, you're getting the worst of both worlds. Many women will assume you're not interested or attracted if you aren't trying to get in their pants, while waiting "until you're ready" rather than for an explicit standard like "until marriage" doesn't actually change much about what you're doing (sex before commitment)--so even the women who would want to wait won't necessarily feel alignment with you.

        If you're going to take things slow, you need to give women a strong reason WHY. Ideally you'd just say upfront that you'd want to wait until marriage, since that says enough right there, but barring that, you're going to need to show her both a compelling reason to wait and reassure her that you're interested and attracted.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    My wife and I were going at it inside of two days. Lots of long time married couples will tell you similar. When you have that kind of chemistry with someone you just don't give a frick.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      You got lucky. It's not actually a good idea even for those couples who make it to marriage. To say nothing of the risk of false positives, of the people who get infatuated and act impulsively as a result.

      If you had such amazing chemistry, waiting longer would be a blip in comparison to a lifetime together. But if you didn't, you just shot yourself in the foot and opened yourself up to getting used, becoming jaded, etc.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        No I didn't. I opened myself up to having had a fling. Flings are a perfectly good thing to have with somebody.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Not for someone who values monogamous commitment, they aren't. For anyone who thinks like you, sure, you just frick around and maybe it'll turn into something more. Either way, you 'win'. Not so for people who assign a deeper meaning to their relationships.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Depends entirely on the relationship. It's perfectly healthy to have a short romance that fizzles out for whatever reason or just doesn't work. Or you're friends and there's an attraction but for a while you're not free to explore it. In the absence of a pregnancy there's no reason to push things further than they naturally go, but it's also stupid to abstain from sex with somebody you like and trust when there's a mutual attraction and freedom. Every time I've done that we stayed friends after.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Depends entirely on the relationship.
            No, it doesn't. It depends on values. To someone who doesn't hold any values concerned with the nature of relationships, sure, it doesn't make sense to you to restrict yourself. But your view is far from the only one out there. Not everyone sees intimacy as a cheap and replaceable amusement.

            >It's perfectly healthy to have a short romance that fizzles out for whatever reason or just doesn't work
            I don't think that training people to treat each other, and the deepest connections they can make, as disposable is very healthy.

            > it's also stupid to abstain from sex with somebody you like and trust when there's a mutual attraction and freedom.
            No, it's not. To be stupid, something has to be contrary to a person's own desired goals, to be a fault in reasoning.
            I don't think you're "stupid" for behaving as you do. But you clearly have a very different starting point, a very different idea of what the good and proper way to live life is in the first place.

            For example, if one agrees entirely with your point of view, that going as far as one wants and feels comfortable with is ideal, it's stupid to arbitrarily restrict oneself (although I'd argue it's contradictory to say that personal desires are intrinsically valid but that desires NOT to act on certain desires somehow don't have the same weight). But by the same token, if we're talking about a person who thinks intimacy should only be within the context of a committed relationship, who values the ideal of lifelong exclusivity, then it is just as stupid--if not even more so--to follow your advice and throw caution to the wind.
            It is a simple fact that, even controlling for religion, those who don't have sex outside of marriage both divorce less and have happier marriages. For someone who values a lasting and happy marriage, then, it's stupid NOT to wait.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    You should wait until you love them enough to marry them. Don’t let sex addled lunatics tell you any differently.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I wanna wait but I'm not foolish enough to get married. I'm trying to find the right balance between being conservative and red pilled.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Quit looking at politics go look in a bible
        There’s a reason so many people willingly give up their entire lives for God let alone waiting until marriage for sex

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          God won't protect you from the ex wife/lawyers/judge/state

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            God said there’s no such thing as divorce so you shouldn’t have to worry about that.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Jesus allowed for it with immoral wives, and used a pretty broad term for immorality.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Where is that? I’m only familiar with the saying “whosoever should give his wife a writing of divorcement saving for the cause of fornication cause her to commit adultery.”

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >I'm not foolish enough to get married.
        What? Why?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Other than the obvious, I want the freedom to drop her if she starts acting like a crazy b***h.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            If you stick to proper standards when looking for a wife and avoid jumping straight to marriage you won’t have this problem.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            kek

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I don’t see what’s so far-fetched about what I said. Good women aren’t impossible to find. A little harder than before, maybe, but not impossible.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Date 1: Formality
    Date 2: Enjoying company
    Date 3: End game to go home
    If it doesn't happen by date 3, there might be a reason, or she wants to take it slow, which is fine
    Future dates might be at home, and it might start with some foreplay

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      As someone with a fair number of women under his belt I can say this is how I'm framing things for a serious relationship but I've also had really good chemistry with some women who've wanted to frick after the 2nd date but date 3 is what I would deem normal circumstances/a fair benchmark to go off.

      Hardcore Trad fellas should know they're an exception when they say wait till marriage which 9/10 is just done bc of faith reasons. For the average schmuck who didn't get a highschool sweetheart setup by the church this does not apply to them.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Anywhere between marriage, or not knowing them at all.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If y’all both normal, a a month or two. If she’s a “modern woman” the first night, because she has done it on the first night with someone else before, so if she doesn’t do it with you, she doesn’t like you like that, and you should keep looking.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    2-3 months or after 7-10 dates.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    At least in till you know what their personality is like

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