Husband Mad I Accepted a Gift from an Ex

One of my exes reached out to me out of the blue to give me a very nice necklace. He said it was an apology for how he never treated me right when we were together, and that he just wanted to give me something. My husband saw the new necklace and was immediately alarmed, asking every detail about this guy and how I knew him. After hearing everything he said I shouldn't wear the necklace again, and that I should give it back to the guy. That feels rude though, how should I handle this?

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The fact that you are still seeing any ex is prostitute behavior, so fricking embarrassing. Also....your husband is aware that you weren't a virgin before you met? He doesn't very high value. What is his net worth? His yearly income? Is he tall/good looking? Why would he date a used up prostitute like you? I would personally never date a non-virgin. Women hit their peak between 18-24 and cannot pair bond if they are not a virgin. The more men that a woman had sex with, the higher chance of divorce. I feel bad for your current husband, Jesus fricking Christ. Dude sounds desperate or low value. Maybe just bluepilled as well.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I never had sex with my ex but thank you for revealing yourself as an opinion to put directly into the garbage!

      Getting mad about this is super insecure. Nice necklaces are expensive; if you get one for free there's no reason not to wear it. I still wear the watch my ex got my even though I'm married to someone else now becuase frick it, it's a nice watch. What would giving the necklace back accomplish at this point?

      Exactly my thinking. If I give the necklace back it would only offend my ex and it wouldn't help anything. I'm not sure why my husband is insecure about it - I've never been unfaithful to him.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Look at it this way. If your ex gave you money instead of a necklace, would your husband make you give that back? Probably not. Maybe a compromise is to sell the necklace and use the money to buy a new one; that way you wouldn't have to wear something that reminds him of your ex. Just an idea though.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        You have prioritized your ex's feelings over your husbands, so he is absolutely right to be alarmed. If you aren't fricking around now you will be very soon because you have already clocked out of that relationship with your husband - and haven't with your ex.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Yes you have, Oral counts.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >I'm not sure why my husband is insecure about it
        your inability to put yourself in your husband's shoes is alarming. in the unlikely event this isn't bait, you have a severe issue with empathy which is going to strain your marriage sooner or later.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Thinking you're a prostitute is not insecurity, it's just a healthy reaction.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >I’d rather please my ex than please my husband

        Bruh

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        why are you meeting your ex behind your husband's back? this anon is right

        The fact that you are still seeing any ex is prostitute behavior, so fricking embarrassing. Also....your husband is aware that you weren't a virgin before you met? He doesn't very high value. What is his net worth? His yearly income? Is he tall/good looking? Why would he date a used up prostitute like you? I would personally never date a non-virgin. Women hit their peak between 18-24 and cannot pair bond if they are not a virgin. The more men that a woman had sex with, the higher chance of divorce. I feel bad for your current husband, Jesus fricking Christ. Dude sounds desperate or low value. Maybe just bluepilled as well.

        I don't believe you didn't sleep with your ex, but either way, you should not be meeting him and you should not have accepted the necklace. return it.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      This guys is an incel

      https://i.imgur.com/O2ocAru.gif

      One of my exes reached out to me out of the blue to give me a very nice necklace. He said it was an apology for how he never treated me right when we were together, and that he just wanted to give me something. My husband saw the new necklace and was immediately alarmed, asking every detail about this guy and how I knew him. After hearing everything he said I shouldn't wear the necklace again, and that I should give it back to the guy. That feels rude though, how should I handle this?

      Return the necklace, have some respect for your husband and recognize that wearing around israeliteelry another man gave you is an insult to him.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      This is like trying to convince others the voices in your head are real people

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    prostitute.

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Getting mad about this is super insecure. Nice necklaces are expensive; if you get one for free there's no reason not to wear it. I still wear the watch my ex got my even though I'm married to someone else now becuase frick it, it's a nice watch. What would giving the necklace back accomplish at this point?

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    prostitute

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    He shouldn't have given her the necklace, sure, but at what point did she do anything wrong? Should she have turned down a free necklace? Why?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Because she's not just in a new relationship but married and in this context it is an overtly romantic gift.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Okay. What difference does it make if she accepts it vs rejecting it?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Accepting the gift shows that she is open to receiving romantic gifts from people other than her partner, rejecting it shows the opposite.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I don't see why it matters that the gift was given with romantic intent. Maybe she just liked the necklace. The Ex's intentions don't really matter here, what matters is the wife's intentions. And those intentions are what they are regardless of whether or not she keeps the necklace.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >I don't see why it matters that the gift was given with romantic intent.
            I just told you, it demonstrates that you are open to romantic courting from other people, the fact that it was given by her ex makes it even worse.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            What do you mean by "open to romantic courting"

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            It means a person is open to the idea of another person pursuing them romantically. If you're in a relationship you're not supposed to accept romantic gestures from people other than your partner.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            If she’s not interested in the ex, I don’t think there’s harm in taking a free necklace. I don’t think her acceptance of the necklace necessarily indicates that she is interested in the ex. It could just mean that she’s open to the idea of getting a necklace that she likes. Good necklaces are expensive.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Even if you have no interest in the other person you are not supposed to accept romantic gifts, because it suggests that you are. If you had a partner and I bought them flowers, chocolate and a ticket to join me at a romantic resort you would be an idiot to think there's nothing wrong with accepting that.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Flowers and a trip are different I think because those are mostly worthless unless you’re interested in the person. I sort of get what you’re saying though, but it sounds like OP genuinely did not mean to send the message that she was romantically interested in her ex. I think a good compromise would be to pawn the necklace and use the money to go out to a nice dinner with her husband.

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Weird to still be in such direct contact. Weirder still to be in a position to accept a necklace either in person or by mail. You never should have accepted it, you just say I appreciate the thought but that would not be appropriate I have a husband that takes care of all those needs for me now

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Sure, maybe the ex wants to get back with her. I don't see why her accepting the necklace vs turning it down makes any difference.

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    prostitute!

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You're married and you accepted a gift from another man with past feelings.

    Husband is rightly upset. You made a mistake not to reject the gift, honestly. This ex of yours is crossing lines by doing this now.

    Apologize to your husband. Return the gift, or pawn it for money if it won't be accepted - and buy your husband something nice with the difference.

    To hell with feelings and good graces - you're going to make a permanent rift with your husband for something easily avoided.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >One of my exes reached out to me out of the blue to give me a very nice necklace. He said it was an apology for how he never treated me right when we were together, and that he just wanted to give me something. My husband saw the new necklace and was immediately alarmed, asking every detail about this guy and how I knew him. After hearing everything he said I shouldn't wear the necklace again, and that I should give it back to the guy. That feels rude though, how should I handle this?
      >I never had sex with my ex but thank you for revealing yourself as an opinion to put directly into the garbage!
      >Exactly my thinking. If I give the necklace back it would only offend my ex and it wouldn't help anything. I'm not sure why my husband is insecure about it - I've never been unfaithful to him.
      remorseless, and inconsiderate of your husbands feelings to the point where you're being more considerate to an EX who "didn't treat you right" let's be honest you're a b***h who takes advantage of weak-willed men..

      this is the only good piece of advice read.

      https://i.imgur.com/O2ocAru.gif

      One of my exes reached out to me out of the blue to give me a very nice necklace. He said it was an apology for how he never treated me right when we were together, and that he just wanted to give me something. My husband saw the new necklace and was immediately alarmed, asking every detail about this guy and how I knew him. After hearing everything he said I shouldn't wear the necklace again, and that I should give it back to the guy. That feels rude though, how should I handle this?

      i really hope you grow and actually change, because whatever is highlighted up top is
      >narcissistic behavior
      i hope your hubby signed a prenuptial agreement

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        This is such facts. Pretending to not even understand his pov, saying that you “don’t understand” your husbands thoughts on the topic.
        You are disgusting. Gain some empathy or admit to urself that the shiny object ur ex hung in front of ur eyes is worth enough to disregard how ur husband feels. Loyalty is priceless make sure to pick wisely before getting wedded to some b***h that can turn her reasoning off at will due to some money/nice item.

        b***h got me schizo-active

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You shouldn’t be in contact with your ex. You shouldn’t be in a situation where he can physically give you a gift
      You shouldn’t accept a gift from your ex
      You are disrespecting your husband by wearing the gift

      You fricked up every step along the way

      this

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You shouldn’t be in contact with your ex. You shouldn’t be in a situation where he can physically give you a gift
    You shouldn’t accept a gift from your ex
    You are disrespecting your husband by wearing the gift

    You fricked up every step along the way

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'd have dumped you on the spot

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      He's married to her, the prostitute has him by the checkbook. He's fricked, big time.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Damn. Imagine being this prostitute's husband. Not only did she accept the gift, she accepted it personally, and talked to her ex as well. Poor fella.

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    WTF. I'd be so, so, jealous if my man had a previous lover, and he accepted a necklace or ring from her, and I was married to him. I'd feel disrespected and worthless, thrown away into the background as leftovers. Why are you still in contact with him? Sell the necklace at a pawn shop and buy something else with it. he has every right to be pissed at you.

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    A necklace that will remind you of your ex whenever you touch, wear, or look at it. I wonder why your husband would have a problem with that.

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    So he gave you an overtly romantic couples gift (because he wants to frick) as an "apology" and you accepted it and then started wearing it? If bait, good bait.

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i hope your husband receives a gift like a watch or nothing cuz w*men don't give gifts to men from an estranged lover so you can understand the perspective and emotion you're husband is feeling in that moment
    >you're the type of chick to ask a homie to wash his hands b4 licking his balls

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I frequently wear a watch my ex gave to me and my wife doesn’t care. It’s a perfectly good watch.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >something given when still in a relationship is the same as a gift this guy is giving OP when she's married to someone else.
        frick off you stupid moron. How are they even remotely tangentially related? Apples and fricking oranges.
        Obviously the hypothetical woman in the OP post didn't even ask if it was okay to talk to her ex in the first place... huge breach of trust for the poor guy.

        Shit like this is why I will never marry, even if this story is fake.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I don’t think they’re really different at all actually.
          >she didn’t ask if it was okay to talk to her ex
          How do you know she was?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >I don’t think they’re really different at all actually.
            well you're a fricking moron so that checks out.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >I frequently wear a watch my ex gave to me and my wife doesn’t care. It’s a perfectly good watch.
        get 'em to do a 3 way

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Here’s how I would think about this. Either OP has feelings for her ex, or she doesn’t. If she doesn’t have feelings for him, then there’s no problem here. She got a free necklace and she may as well wear it. If she does have feelings for him, there are issues here that extend way beyond the necklace, and her acceptance or rejection of the gift is immaterial to the actual problem, which is that she has feelings for another guy. Either way, her acceptance of the necklace itself is not a problem. The only way to say that there is bad stuff going on here is to make assumptions about context that we don’t have.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >her acceptance of the necklace itself is not a problem
      Except for all the reasons others have given above for why it is most definitely a problem, you mean.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        No one has given a convincing reason for why, specifically, accepting the necklace is a problem

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          If the fact that a married woman is meeting up with her abusive ex without telling her bf, to recieve "gifts" and talk to this guy isn't giving you a bunch of red flags then you're a moronic cuck.
          There's zero reasoning with you.

          In your mind there is zero world where she cheats, when she's already demonstrated that she has zero regard for her husband's boundaries.
          Which is the actual thing she did wrong here.
          thing 1: She didn't know her own husband's boundaries when it comes to meeting with her EX.
          thing 2: She didn't bother asking if it was too much, she just went ahead and did it.
          thing 3: She didn't realize the error of her ways, didn't appologize, and if the above two are anything to go off of she'll be meeting her EX again.

          Once there's no trust in your relationship, it's over.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I think you’re jumping to conclusions by assuming that she’s cheating because her ex gave her a necklace. The thing is, most cheaters try to keep it secret. If the wife is actually cheating, or intends to do so, I don’t think she would take a necklace from the guy and wear it in front of her husband. Or if she did, she would lie about where it came from.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I didn't say she cheated. I'm saying she has no respect for his boundaries.
            Also cheating is very obviously where this is going to end up if she keeps meeting up in person with her ex, let's be fricking real.

            Kind of obvious she never asked if that was okay in the first place either, seeing how OP never mentions the circumstances.

            If I was OP's husband I'd have already thrown the necklace out.
            And if I saw some guy talking to my wife without my prior knowledge, getting her gifts, he'd be getting punched in the head.

            I'm sure a lot of people will try to claim that's immature, or insecure but it's called not being a fricking doormat actually.

            Also I still don't buy that any of this shit happened for a second, it's very shitty bait.
            Post the necklace if it's real.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            It is sort of insecure, though. Your wife has made a commitment to you and built a life with you, and you think all it would take to change her mind is a simple necklace? You must think your relationship is pretty flimsy.
            I agree if she ends up cheating that would be bad, but you're jumping to conclusions again thinking that's what will happen.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            No, it's not insecurity. It's called get your own wife.
            If some guy can't respect the fact that my wife is MY wife, thinks he can just meet up with her whenever he wants without MY knowledge, with total impunity? He's having his nose broken.

            Again, I didn't say anything about her cheating, and if this man breaks her EX's nose that's very obviously not going to happen.
            If he ignores some other guy courting his wife? ehhh... who knows what will happen. People throw away 20 year marriages for less. And OP seems pretty stupid too, so there's that as well.

            I also still don't think this thread is genuine, just engaging in the hypothetical.
            I'm curious to hear if you think that OP's husband should just let her keep meeting up with men and receiving gifts, as that's what you seem to be advocating, and if that's the end goal why do you think nobody marries girls who do OnlyFans? food for thought.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Here’s how I would think about this. Either OP has feelings for her ex, or she doesn’t. If she doesn’t have feelings for him, then there’s no problem here. She got a free necklace and she may as well wear it. If she does have feelings for him, there are issues here that extend way beyond the necklace, and her acceptance or rejection of the gift is immaterial to the actual problem, which is that she has feelings for another guy. Either way, her acceptance of the necklace itself is not a problem. The only way to say that there is bad stuff going on here is to make assumptions about context that we don’t have.

          wrong. it is disrespectful to the husband. that's why he is upset. she was wrong.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Here’s how I would think about this. Either OP has feelings for her ex, or she doesn’t. If she doesn’t have feelings for him, then there’s no problem here. She got a free necklace and she may as well wear it. If she does have feelings for him, there are issues here that extend way beyond the necklace, and her acceptance or rejection of the gift is immaterial to the actual problem, which is that she has feelings for another guy. Either way, her acceptance of the necklace itself is not a problem. The only way to say that there is bad stuff going on here is to make assumptions about context that we don’t have.
      whatever you say won't un-frick the Thanksgiving turkey

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    donate the necklace to charity or something

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You ex will try to frick you in the future.

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    prostitute

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Your ex is a total idiot and you should've cut ties with him long ago. But of course you don't because women love using guys, whether it's for attention or money or to get another guy jealous. Men to women are like Pokemon cards, gotta catch them all!

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    > That feels rude though, how should I handle this?
    Yeah and you should be rude because how you react to that is a statement of the strength of your relationship. Ask yourself what you feel more strongly about your husband or your ex.

    Unless a gift is life changing and mutually beneficial for your partner(IE: Money, a car, a house,tickets somewhere) you shouldn't be accepting shit from other men. We won't care

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Pic related?

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    how can you have such little empathy jesus christ
    did you even consider how this would make your husband feel, you putting your ex's feelings over his?
    you should be ashamed of yourself

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You should not have accepted it unless you mean to reenter into a romantic relationship with him. Super disrespectful fo your husband. Think about how he feels.

  24. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    This seems like a subtle bait thead, if not ofcourse it's worrying to your husband if your ex is trying to slide back into your life and you don't stop that shit. Why does your ex need to be in your good grace? Unless you've been like best friends since kintergarten and your families are close or some other shit why does he need to be in your life at all?

  25. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Honestly, if I was your husband and you told me that, I'd just frick a bunch of thai prostitutes and play some vidya.
    No energy or time to worry about this shit.

  26. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Tell him that he's allowed to receive gifts from his ex as well

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >my boundaries are totally different than yours, but it's okay I violated yours since I'd be okay with it.
      people like you don't belong in relationships.

  27. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    We can all agree that this didn't actually happen, right? OK, good. YWNBAW, etc.

  28. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    pawn it and buy another necklace
    gifts are meaningful because the other person chose it, if you sell it you strip away that meaning and your husband should be fine with it
    it also isnt rude because a gift is, by definition, something the giver shouldn't care about once given

  29. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    If he wanted to apologize, you apologize. Giving a physical gift, especially israeliteelry, is suspicious. He wants you to wear something to remember you by? That's weird, one thing to be in another relationship but another entirely to be married.

    You should return it, accept the apology but not the gift and respect your husband by doing this.

  30. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Don’t listen to these incels, you did nothing wrong. It was basically a gift from a good friend.
    What’s the last time your husband gave you a gift, to she he cares about you. Look, your hubby can be upset all he wants, but will soon apologize to you, for acting like a child.
    Matter of fact, you should spend more time with your ex and take pictures of how happy you are, to be treated right for once. If something happens between you and your ex, maybe a hug, a kiss, or even sex. it’s not your fault, but your husbands for not going gong you the love you deserve.
    You should sleep with your ex bf, that will help your husband realize he was in the wrong and will shower you in gifts for making him see the errors of his ways.

  31. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    All these threads are probably b8 but my life is so bleak & meaningless that I'll answer it as though it's real while basically knowing full well that it is fake.
    You shouldn't be even in contact with your ex you dumb moron. Your husband is in the right and you're a horrible wife.

  32. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Divorcerape your ungratefull husband, he married you only for the sex. Go back to your ex and have fun for 4 months, split up again be lonley and start a feminist blog and blame society for your lack of character.

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