i have a crush on my boyfriend's friend

I'm in a relationship, and I have a crush, and the crush wants to date my sister. My life is like a comedy at this point.

I made a post about this situation here some time ago, and now I feel like the situation is getting out of hand. So I have a long-term boyfriend (who's also my first everything, first bf, and I'm very happy with him), but I've also developed an embarrassing crush on his close friend. I want to get rid of the crush, but don't know how to. And now, the crush seemingly wants to date my sister.

A bit of background: some time ago me, my bf, and the friend were all talking at a concert. I mentioned my sister, and when my bf's friend (my crush) asked about my sister, I also mentioned that she's my twin. At this point the crush got very interested, and kept asking questions about her. When me and my bf told him what she's like (me and my sister are both a bit weird, we don't have friends or don't use any social media), my bf's friend started heavily implying that he wants to date her, take her out for coffee and stuff like that. And my bf loves the idea, because he knows that his friend likes women who aren't into social media. I do know that they *could* be a good couple, and that possibility makes me anxious.

now I don't want to limit my sister's happiness and the possibility of her meeting a good guy like this friend. but. I have a really extreme crush on this guy (that I want to keep a secret 100%), and I am very sure that my feelings for this guy would only deepen if he started dating my twin sister, because then I'd see him more often, and I don't want that at all. I still love my bf, but I feel like the more I see his friend, the more this crush is turning into "oneitis" and not just a crush. So, I want to be able to focus on my relationship and not be distracted by this crush, that's what I'm hoping for. but that could not happen if my crush started dating my sister, who I'm very close to.

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  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    cont.

    what do? I do feel that the most logical option is to avoid them from meeting so that my feelings for this friend wouldn't deepen more. but I also have a hard time convincing my bf that they shouldn't date since he's very into the idea of them meeting each other, because it's obvious that they'd get along well together.

  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If he'd dating your twin sister you can frick him whenever you want by pretending to be her.

    This would make a good story.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      i know you're joking but no lol. we also look kinda different and have completely different hairstyles/hair color. but I think that my crush thinks my sister will look like me since he did seem to think of her as attractive, even if he's never met my sister.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        get him drink, get under table with your ass in the air, wait till you hear him enter the room and imitate your sister's voice. once he's fricking he won't stop

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          nah, i just want to stop having this crush. i think a person can have a good relationship even if they get a crush, as long as that crush goes away eventually and they don't act on it. that's what i'm doing (not acting on it)

          Just find something about the guy that annoys you and logic how it would never work out because of it. For one, he wants to frick your sister only knowing that she might look like you.

          i don't think it's that he simply wants to have sex with her, i think he genuinely wants to meet her and see if he can have a relationship with her because she has some traits he likes in women (no social media for example).

          how do i find out annoying things about him, without making it obvious i have a crush on him?

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    you know how this ends
    frick him like the worthless clump of self serving matter you are

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      if you're implying i would cheat, never. this friend is also very respectful of our relationship, he'd never do something like that either.
      my question is not "how to cheat". my question is "how to get rid of my crush".

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Just find something about the guy that annoys you and logic how it would never work out because of it. For one, he wants to frick your sister only knowing that she might look like you.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        you only think you won't cheat now
        the vast majority of unfaithful women start out thinking exactly like you are
        they aren't cartoonish jezebels, they're real living people with morals who wind up in an awful, messy situation with a thousand moving parts wrapped up in peoples' feelings (like yours) that keeps escalating/keeps wearing them down until they can't bear it anymore, because they were too weak to put a stop to it when such a thing was possible
        what you need to do is take decisive action now so you'll never see him again so these feelings won't develop any further

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          well i definitely think i won't cheat, but i am afraid that if i would see him more often (which would definitely happen if he started dating my sister), and that my "aloof mask" would start to slip. that would make my bf realize i have a crush, and it would crush his self-confidence at the very least, which i never want to happen.
          so far, for about 1,5 years, I've managed to act very aloof around this friend whenever I've been around him, and I've seen him on average once every 4-6 months. I usually don't talk to him at all baically, and I mostly just chill while my bf and him are talking.

          so, the way I see it, the way to "take decisive action now" as you put it, would be to make sure this friend won't meet my sister. I feel like the best way to achieve this would be to seriously tell my bf that I don't want to set up his friend with my sister. but I've been pondering about this, because how do I do this without arising suspicions from my bf? we both know they'd get along well together, I can't find any excuse to say that could make me prevent my bf setting them up together. any ideas with this?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            cant help you there my only relationship experience is infidelity related lmao

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            well, i appreciate the help nonetheless lol. this is my first relationship so i'm also at a bit of a loss here too. i'm just anxious because i think i need to think of something fast to make my bf give up on the idea of setting them up together since he seems very intent on it. but yeah, thanks still.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            So you’re put your fricked up experiences onto everyone else. Soooo smart.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            you only see him every 4-6 months and he didnt try to get set up with her at the concert?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            yes, we usually see my bf's friend at gigs/concerts because we all share the same limited music taste. but it has happened a few times too that the friend has visited my bf, and i was invited along, or bf visited friend, and i was also invited along. but mostly just at concerts.

            my sister doesn't like this genre of music really, but she likes some songs. so she never comes along even if it's in the town where she lives. also, i had never mentioned me having a twin sister to this guy before, so the friend didn't even know i had a sister before then. but, 2 weeks ago the friend did ask me and my boyfriend to bring my sister along next time, because 2 weeks ago was the time when i mentioned i have a sister.

            Damn girl, you barely see this guy. Just forget about hooking up your sister with him and use the time gaps as an excuse.

            yep. but it also doesn't help that my bf talks about him a lot. i also feel that my feelings only became more "intense" since last time, because that was the first time he seemed like he was talking to me a lot for some reason, and doing things like getting annoyed when random guys bumped into me.
            >use the time gaps as an excuse
            can you specify what you mean?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            why do you have a crush on him? what about him is different than your BF?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            "Oh, I forgot about that since I haven't see him since December I'll bring it up next time I'm at my sister's LOL" and just never do.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            the issue is that my boyfriend is the one who seems very interested in setting them up together, and he's friendly with my sister, so he very well could set them up together without involving me . so i i'm in a tough situation because it's on me to tell my bf to not set them up. i just need an excuse for this basically.

            why do you have a crush on him? what about him is different than your BF?

            i guess it's partly personality. the friend is very chill and calm, while my bf is more of an "adhd" guy. i don't strictly prefer either kind of personality, but i guess it's true that being chill can make one seem more ""mysterious"" in your mind.
            personally i'm the kind who doesn't like social media and isn't too social. in comparison my bf is very social, and he's the type of guy who likes posting on social media. the friend on the other hand also doesn't like social media, or even the internet as a whole, and he's very "oldschool", which I guess was cool to me when I heard about it.
            there are other things similar to these things, but you probably don't want me to write an essay or anything.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >you probably don't want me to write an essay or anything
            I do because I'm an autist and I want to know what women actually see in guys when they are crushing. That was good, but if you want to continue, please do

            Tbh it sounds like you might be more compatible with a "chill" guy, especially since you're crushing so hard, but you might find out you dont like him so much after you peel back the mystery

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Well, I guess you can figure out how your sister feels about it and hopefully for you she does not want. Or I guess you can let this play out into a dramatic romcom. It's just your first bf afterall. Things are bound to get weird.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            i haven't mentioned anything at all to her so far, because i feel that she would be curious. i just need to contain this somehow.
            and i know many people have a kind of "whatever" attitude about their first relationships, but i do take this relationship seriously, we've been together for a long time. i feel that i got lucky on my first try so to speak, so i do not want to destroy my relationship.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Well it's only a matter of time before you grow apart. You want other men. And you can't get it out of your head. In fact it's getting stronger. Your bf is a good guy for you, but you've outgrown him and want something more than what he can give you.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >outgrown
            kek she just wants to monkeybranch to some Chad musician dick

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            i'm not looking to do that, they are friends and you never go for the friend of someone you're dating, ever. also, if the anons here saw the friend, i doubt you would be calling him chad based on his looks.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >i doubt you would be calling him chad based on his looks.
            If he's not that attractive and is quiet (or at least chill) why are you crushing so hard? If he's chill and you've only seen him 3-4 times, then you must have not talked much. I think you might be subconsciously feeling the personality diff betwenn you and extrovert bf

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You can't prevent it by not saying anything. Either confess to your BF or your sister

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            i never considered before as i didn't consider this crush to be serious before, but i do feel that it's gotten serious now. so i have been considering it in recent days, telling my bf. i have no idea what would happen, and likely it would completely crush his self-confidence. but i don't want that to happen. maybe i need to leave, because it might be that leaving would actually hurt him less. even if i love him and have always seen him as "the one" for me.
            i just want this crush to end and for everything to go back to normal, but that would bee to easy wouldn't it.

            Well it's only a matter of time before you grow apart. You want other men. And you can't get it out of your head. In fact it's getting stronger. Your bf is a good guy for you, but you've outgrown him and want something more than what he can give you.

            i don't feel like i've necessarily outgrown my bf. we are extremely close, find each other attractive, and we pretty much share all our interests and important views. what i sometimes feel like is that this might be me just longing for that excitement that eventually always goes away in long-term relationships. and i don't want to be someone who jumps from relationship to relationship, always looking for that "high". i want to be with someone for the rest of my life, that's been my goal always.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            It sounds like ur just comfy in ur situation but also bored and not fulfilled. Everyone goes through what you're experiencing in a long term relationship. They either fight their desire or give in... eventually it'll be someone else - maybe not ur bfs friend but another guy. Either way ur bf isn't doing something for you (probably ain't hitting it right)

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            sexo is definitely good, but I guess I do often feel like we are more like best friends rather than a couple (despite having sex). but I don't know what to do about that really, don't all long-term relationships eventually basically become more like a close friendship?
            i also had a crush on my bf when we met. so that leads me to believe that even if i left for someone who i had a crush in, things would settle in again, and i would be in the same situation as i am in now. but i do want to be together with my bf, so i think that leaving just because things aren't that romantic or exciting anymore isn't a good reason to leave a long-term relationship.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Does your bf have a more passive or dominant personality?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I'm not sure. I think he was dominant for the first couple of years, but has since become less so. for example he always asks me what to do, what to eat, he always asks me first. but he is definitely not a sub in bed, so sexually he is dominant.
            But I don't blame him because I know he's been kinda depressed for the past few years thanks to having no hope about the future and having a hard time finding a job. I've tried my best, but I don't feel like I can have much of an impact on this, I'm trying to support him and be a good gf. even though I know I'm failing the "good gf" thing obviously since I have this secret crush.
            I know this situation might sound a bit hopeless, but I don't plan on ever leaving my bf unless he leaves me (or does something like become abusive), he's supported me and I support him.

            >i doubt you would be calling him chad based on his looks.
            If he's not that attractive and is quiet (or at least chill) why are you crushing so hard? If he's chill and you've only seen him 3-4 times, then you must have not talked much. I think you might be subconsciously feeling the personality diff betwenn you and extrovert bf

            the crush is kinda short (not a bad thing to me, but I know people often see this as a flaw) and not a model or anything, but I mean he does have a good face. I wasn't trying to say that he's ugly.
            and yeah I didn't think about the timeline too much in that reply. but to be more exact, I believe I've been around him probably 6-7 times, and all were quite long hangouts. I didn't have a crush on him the first few times I was hanging out with him and bf.
            >I think you might be subconsciously feeling the personality diff betwenn you and extrovert bf
            I think that could be true definitely. but I also don't want to fall for the "grass is greener" mindset.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I think he was dominant for the first couple of years, but has since become less so. for example he always asks me what to do, what to eat, he always asks me first.
            >But I don't blame him because I know he's been kinda depressed for the past few years thanks to having no hope about the future and having a hard time finding a job. I've tried my best, but I don't feel like I can have much of an impact on this, I'm trying to support him and be a good gf
            I wonder if this might be part of why your eyes have started to wander a bit?

            Maybe you could have a talk with him and express that you've noticed him starting to defer to you a lot, and that you like it when he takes charge a little bit more?

            On the depression front, I'm curious if he's getting any kind of treatment?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You sound young, you will inevitably break up, sorry. This is the female version of "it's over"

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            what is the female version of "it's over", my situation? and I am in my early twenties, but there is a reason for things like why i've never used dating apps or why i never considered doing things like having casual sex, it's because i have certain views and i've always acted according to them. that's why i believe i would never do something like cheating. but i do feel guilty about this crush and especially with this situation with my sister, i feel like it's taking up all my mental capacity recently.

            I've never been cheated on. I'm in my goddamn thirties with a wife of seven years being lectured by some ditzy college bawd who still uses the term "crush" because she doesn't want to admit another guy makes her pussy wet, and then proceeds to say it's not her fault because "something something we're not in control of our minds." Like I said, you're just dodging responsibility. Even if you don't act on your feelings, is it fair to your boyfriend that you're lusting after another guy constantly? I'm not naive, I'm old enough to know how this shit is going to pan out because like I said: you need to self-analyze, and you're not going to do it.

            >college bawd
            >a woman who has only ever been with one man, her first and current bf
            Sure

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Jelly your sis will get mr Exciting while you rot away with Safe Dude 9000?

            Spice it up with your bf or you'll start resenting your sister cuz of your irrational emotions.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            honestly I doubt I would get those very jealous feelings you're probably imagining. we're very close and we're very similar too thanks to being twins, so sadly I do assume that I would not get jealous but rather my crush would deepen even more since I would see the guy more often.
            but I do admit this is a selfish motivation, not wanting to set them up together. I know it would negatively affect me a lot since my feelings for the crush would deepen, and that would make this situation even more annoying and tougher. I just wish the crush would go away, but at this point I realize it's only gotten stronger.

            I just always think it's weird that people would call someone a bawd if she has a body count of 1. Maybe some sort of insecurity about their own first love or the person they lost their virginity to, I can't say. the fact that you made it clear you're this kind of person made it obvious to me that I should listen to the opinions of someone who doesn't think of every woman as a bawd, and frankly I wonder what your wife would think of you talking to random women on NSFFW and calling them bawds? A man acting that way is not normal in any way.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >the fact that you made it clear you're this kind of person made it obvious to me that I should listen to the opinions of someone who doesn't think of every woman as a bawd
            No, you're just looking for the easy out because what I suggested puts the responsibility on (You) instead of giving you a pat on the ass and a glass of warm milk before telling you everything will work out. I don't have to police my language to coddle a child looking for any excuse to take the irresponsible–but easy–options. It's fine, like I said you're not going to listen to my advice regardless, but it'd be a good exercise for you to figure out why you choose to hyper-fixate on a term I used off-hand without a scrap of thought as to its applicability rather than talk about the awesome advice you're getting for free.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            nah. I just realized that even though there's been good and even some very tough advice in this thread, it's never good to listen to a man who makes you feel extremely sad for his girlfriend/wife.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I have a fantastic relationship with my wife because we both use the exact same advice I'm giving you. Like I said, you've already made up your mind and retrofitted a convenient excuse, hopefully you remember this when you have to cash the check you wrote yourself when your boyfriend eventually says something that upsets you.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >we both use the exact same advice
            >i have a wife who goes on NSFFW and has a hobby of whining about imaginary bawds
            Interesting relationship, keep it up. I'll be listening to advice from other anons though, but I think you're not someone anyone should take advice from.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >i have a wife who goes on NSFFW and has a hobby of whining about imaginary bawds
            I don't think that's the advice I gave you. I also recommend literacy courses.
            >but I think you're not someone anyone should take advice from.
            Fair enough, I've only been a military family counselor what's coming up on a decade so I'm probably not worth listening to.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >and frankly I wonder what your wife would think of you talking to random women on NSFFW and calling them bawds? A man acting that way is not normal in any way.

            Holy shit the shortsightedness. I wonder what your boyfriend would think of you making multiple threads on a message board about how his best friend makes your pussy wet. You are genuinely a bad person.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Sure
            Continuing to prove me right by ignoring the crux of my argument to focus on irrelevant details.

            what exactly does she need to analyze, and how? what do you think she would end up finding?

            >what exactly does she need to analyze, and how?
            She needs to figure out what her attraction is rooted in. Is it lust? Probably, but then why? Is it a problem with the relationship? Is the relationship fine but she's just a bit bored? The how of it differs form person to person, but I would say the most generic way is to sit down in a quiet place and make a mental (or literal) checklist and run down the state of one's relationship with both parties.
            >what do you think she would end up finding?
            Early twenties, one boyfriend ever? I would bet good money she's bored and restless because the honeymoon period is over and there's something new in her life that sparks that "new and exciting" feeling. The problem is that she's looking for a magic bullet when there is none, it requires consistent discipline and practice to figure out who you ACTUALLY are rather than some bullshit conception of the kind of person you are. Having worked with a lot of women ranging from fricking nineteen-year-old zoomettes to post-menopausal, I can say confidently that the women who don't know themselves are exponentially more likely to leave a fricking trail of destruction in their wake.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >women who don't know themselves are exponentially more likely to leave a fricking trail of destruction in their wake.
            She doesn't know who she is, only who she wants to be. She has more chance of causing destruction because shes female and holds more of the cards in the relationship. The guy will always be at a disadvantage because guys fall in love easier and have a harder time finding a partner

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Damn girl, you barely see this guy. Just forget about hooking up your sister with him and use the time gaps as an excuse.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >i definitely think
            many such cases. you are deluding yourself into thinking you are more moral than you are, because you need it. and you need the stability of your relationship, current self image, self narrative. one day you won't, you'll leave a trainwreck behind, and everyone involved will rightfully hate you.
            I seriously doubt the real reason you don't want your sister with this guy, even if you don't understand it yourself.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            you can believe what you want anon, and i'm sorry if you've been cheated on before or had something like that happen. but i know myself, and i also know the guy and how he's very respectful of our relationship.

            the way i see it is that if he and my sister do end up together and i fail to stop my bf from setting them up, i would continue pining for him, but i would never act on it. this isn't cheating per se, but still extremely bad even if nothing "happens", it's very disrespectful having an intense crush on someone else.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            It sounds like you just think your friends bf is hot. Which is normal to think other people are attractive, we live in a society. But honestly you can only hold out for so long. You have a crush because you want him, and that means your boyfriend isn't fulfilling a desire you have. Next thing you know you'll be jerking off thinking of his friend, having sex and thinking about him.

            You're torn between desire and morality. On one hand you love your bf and he's good to you. On the other is an animalistic desire to be bred by his friend. Just keep holding out. Pretty much all you can do. You can't just get rid of a crush lol

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            no way to get rid of a crush? that's depressing. but yeah i just hope that the friend will find some other gf (not my sister), and we will start seeing him less often.

            >you probably don't want me to write an essay or anything
            I do because I'm an autist and I want to know what women actually see in guys when they are crushing. That was good, but if you want to continue, please do

            Tbh it sounds like you might be more compatible with a "chill" guy, especially since you're crushing so hard, but you might find out you dont like him so much after you peel back the mystery

            oh well, I was also a bit worried because the more I mention things that I like about the crush/things that made me have the crush, the more random anons will keep accusing me of cheating or that i will cheat. but I'm too neurotic to do anything like that, and again, the friend is very respectful of our friendship. my bf and the friend are very close, i know them enough that neither of them would sabotage the others relationship.
            but yeah, I guess it's also hard to not see my bf's friend as intriguing because on top of everything, he's also a pretty accomplished musician in the music scene we're all basically a part of. like there are pics of him on metallum (metal music wiki) and he's in a couple album covers too. so i guess it's not just personality but the ""cool"" factor as well. but i wouldn't call him a celebrity or anything though since this is an underground thing, not mainstrem metal.
            i also think that this crush i have was just a simple crush before, but a few weeks ago it became more like an intense crush, after that conversation that involed my sister. the friend had always seemed almost asexual to me since he never talked about relationships or women or anything like that really, but when he kept talking about dating my sister in a tone that was both flirty and joking, it just made feel really nervous i guess. he had never seen my sister before, and yet still implied that my twin sister would be attractive, so that felt almost like an indirect compliment. before that convo, i had always buried any thought at all about him possibly finding me attractive, like there was no chance at all for that in my head. so when that chance finally did enter my head, it felt overwhelming.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            one drink, maybe even one day where you're just really tired is all it takes for your perfect world to come crashing down.
            people make life decisions based on knstinct, not on grand notions of the type of person "they are". the narrative is constructed after the fact. I'm just going to point it out up front because it is a fact that will help you if you come to terms with it.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            you do recognize that there are people out there who are in relationships, get a big crush, but never act on it, right? if you genuinely believe that every person who gets a crush in a relationship cheats, i would simply call you delusional.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            No, I just think you're a moron. I see plenty of hot women, some of my wife's friends are objectively more attractive than her, and they don't live in my mind rent-free nor do I particularly even care about them in any way because I like my wife. You "crushing" on someone else is entirely within your control, you just don't want to think about that because you're laying the brickwork to frick him instead of doing some self-analysis about what your priorities in life are. You're young, the honeymoon period is over, you're getting bored and restless, and you're finding every excuse in the book to not correct yourself. Please do your boyfriend the biggest favor of his life and break up with him before you break his heart.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I mean I would stop having a crush if it was possible, but I don't think it's possible to will yourself into not having it. But I do think that it can become less intense over time and even go away if you limit contact.

            I don't understand why this is so difficult for you. Your boyfriend 100% is attracted to and would frick/date many of the women in his life (some even sexier than you), yet he doesn't cry like a little b***h about it on NSFFW. This isn't a game and you're always going to crush on other guys no matter what relationship you're in. If you understand that and you still aren't happy with you bf, then break up with him. but if you're just going to hop from one relationship to the next then you need to grow the frick up. I mean, supposedly women are more mature than men, so what's your excuse?

            well the reason I vent about it here is that I felt like I needed to get my thoughts out somewhere. also, I talked about what you mentioned in this reply

            sexo is definitely good, but I guess I do often feel like we are more like best friends rather than a couple (despite having sex). but I don't know what to do about that really, don't all long-term relationships eventually basically become more like a close friendship?
            i also had a crush on my bf when we met. so that leads me to believe that even if i left for someone who i had a crush in, things would settle in again, and i would be in the same situation as i am in now. but i do want to be together with my bf, so i think that leaving just because things aren't that romantic or exciting anymore isn't a good reason to leave a long-term relationship.

            and definitely don't think it's a good idea to leave a relationship or consider it bad just because you don't have a crush on each other anymore.
            but idk why this crush is so intense for me really. i don't think i've had any other crushes during my relationship even if i've met men who are more attractive physically than my bf.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I mean I would stop having a crush if it was possible
            You have the mentality of a child. You're dodging responsibility by putting the onus of your feelings on some vague chemical or cosmic force rather than something rooted in your own psyche, that way you don't ever have to actually feel bad for what's inevitably going to happen. Cutting off contact isn't addressing the problem the same way never going outside again isn't a viable solution to not getting sunburnt. While it's very difficult to control initial reactions without practice, you are more than capable of delving into why you feel the things you feel and addressing them at the root level.

            You won't, though, so like I said I recommend breaking up with the poor bastard before you ruin his life.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I think that's a very naive mindset. Most people realize that you can't "will" a crush away. You make steps that will lessen the crush.
            I think you've probably been cheated on before and that's why someone talking about having a crush in a relationship makes you insecure. But, it's good to realize that many people who have crushes don't act on it. You should keep in mind for the future that it's possible to have a crush, and not act on it, while taking steps to distance oneself from said crush. I suggest you let go of that naive mindset that tells you that having a crush means cheating, with no other possiblities.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I've never been cheated on. I'm in my goddamn thirties with a wife of seven years being lectured by some ditzy college bawd who still uses the term "crush" because she doesn't want to admit another guy makes her pussy wet, and then proceeds to say it's not her fault because "something something we're not in control of our minds." Like I said, you're just dodging responsibility. Even if you don't act on your feelings, is it fair to your boyfriend that you're lusting after another guy constantly? I'm not naive, I'm old enough to know how this shit is going to pan out because like I said: you need to self-analyze, and you're not going to do it.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            what exactly does she need to analyze, and how? what do you think she would end up finding?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I'm in my goddamn thirties with a wife of seven years being lectured by some ditzy college bawd
            do you talk to your "patients" like that? I'd never want you as a counselor. you sound like a dumb meathead ZOGbot

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >do you talk to your "patients" like that?
            >Do you treat people in a professional setting the way you do on NSFFW
            Obviously everything that I say here is the exact same stuff I say to my clientelle.
            >I'd never want you as a counselor, you sound like a dumb meathead ZOGbot
            Of course you wouldn't, our session would end at day one before I get to the REALLY hard questions like some of them do. I've learned a lot from having to try my damndest to salvage relationships ranging from PFC Schmuckatelli who graduated high school last year (who, by the way, blew his entire enslistment bonus on a Mustang) and his stripper wife all the way to senior chiefs working for longer than their subordinates have been alive sitting on the cusp of suck-starting an M9.

            Ultimately, my language here isn't pretty and I'm not offering you cookies across the table, but what I'm saying is literally the most important aspect of ANY healthy relationship. If you can't figure out who you are by approaching your feelings in a realistic way and knowing what you ACTUALLY want versus what you think you want, you're going to crush your boyfriend's heart before drifting through several relationships which will erode your soul until you settle with someone who doesn't make you happy because you just don't want to be alone any more. No, it's not pretty, but it's a pretty consistent pattern of behavior from men AND women.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >crush your boyfriend's heart
            Why are you siding with the BF so much? Maybe they're both settling for each other because they're fricking 22?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            just want to add I'm in my early twenties and he's in his late twenties, and the crush is a little older, 30 or 31 I think.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You also conveniently ignored the part where I said that she'll proceed to hurt herself in the long-term as well. I'm not siding with him so much as I'm giving an extreme example of the consequences of inaction.
            >Maybe they're both settling for each other because they're fricking 22?
            Possibly, hence why I suggest realistic self-analysis rather than "ignore it until it goes away" or "cut off all contact with this person because that definitely is realistic and won't look suspicious in the slightest, and most CERTAINLY won't exacerbate the cracks in my relationship when my boyfriend asks me uncomfortable questions about why I refuse to hang out with his friend and I have to lie to his face or spill my guts."

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            So the only solution is to break up?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I blame myself for not using smaller words and fewer syllables, this isn't your fault. Let me try that again:

            Jane think of feelings. Are feelings real, or Jane just horny? Maybe Jane have problems with boyfriend but Jane no think about them much. Maybe Jane like other guy because personality match better, or maybe because he even older and that make Jane horny. If Jane think real hard about what she likes about boyfriend, is bad stuff not too bad? Jane want instant solution to make feelings go away, but feelings like scrape on leg that oozes gross stuff, feelings no just go away without medicine. Medicine is think, ignoring problem like rubbing poop on scrape and hoping new germs kill old ones.

            No the only solution isn't fricking breaking up, it's simply one solution and possibly the best one for someone who doesn't have the mental maturity to address problems rather than resorting to nuclear options. Alternatively, it might come down to "maybe my relationship isn't that good after all" and after having a healthy ADULT conversation with one another, you both decide it's best to go separate ways on amicable terms. Even then, maybe there is no problem after all, you're just slightly horny for the other guy, and you realize that whatever fleeting lust you have for him doesn't compare to the comfort and security of your existing relationship, and it just fades away over time. The ultimate point I'm trying to make is that you're only going to find the correct (or the least bad) solution by self-reflection and tackling what relationship strains may or may not exist.

            This idea that it can be fixed by just cutting contact falls apart the minute someone asks an uncomfortable question, and you're going to have to do it EVERY time you run into a guy that turns you on. What do you do when it's someone you work with? Do you see my point?

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >healthy ADULT
            She's not really an adult yet. You calling her a ditzy bawd was kind of overplaying your hand, you're just an butthole/troll who should be ignored

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Overreaction perhaps, but I break out in hives at the thought of somebody with the collective life experience of an infant calling me naïve while in the same breath freaking out about the first time she got the hots for another guy and instantly thinking the correct answer is cutting off contact entirely.
            >you're just an butthole/troll who should be ignored
            Of course I am, because I'm giving advice that provides someone with the tools to fix their problems rather than kick dirt over them or making them a "future me" problem. It's incredibly easy to call me an butthole or a troll because I'm saying the exact thing you don't want to hear: there's no easy answer, you have to put in the work and ask yourself some hard fricking questions.
            >She's not really an adult yet.
            At 22? Provided we're going by United States law, she is old enough to: consume alcohol, give birth to and raise a child, buy a home or otherwise live on her own, work for a living, pay taxes, fight the nation's wars, smoke cigarettes, or be tried in a court of law as an adult. In a psychological sense, no she probably doesn't have the tools necessary to self-reflect by default, especially given the fact that zoomers were effectively raised by goddamn wolves. It may not be her fault, but it *is* her problem. I may not offer the answer in a pretty package, but it's the only correct answer.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Overreaction perhaps, but I break out in hives at the thought of somebody with the collective life experience of an infant calling me naïve while in the same breath freaking out about the first time she got the hots for another guy and instantly thinking the correct answer is cutting off contact entirely.
            >you're just an butthole/troll who should be ignored
            Of course I am, because I'm giving advice that provides someone with the tools to fix their problems rather than kick dirt over them or making them a "future me" problem. It's incredibly easy to call me an butthole or a troll because I'm saying the exact thing you don't want to hear: there's no easy answer, you have to put in the work and ask yourself some hard fricking questions.
            >She's not really an adult yet.
            At 22? Provided we're going by United States law, she is old enough to: consume alcohol, give birth to and raise a child, buy a home or otherwise live on her own, work for a living, pay taxes, fight the nation's wars, smoke cigarettes, or be tried in a court of law as an adult. In a psychological sense, no she probably doesn't have the tools necessary to self-reflect by default, especially given the fact that zoomers were effectively raised by goddamn wolves. It may not be her fault, but it *is* her problem. I may not offer the answer in a pretty package, but it's the only correct answer.

            In fact, to pre-empt the next "UR JUST A TROLL I'M NOT LISTENING TO YOU" I want you to repeat this or something along these lines:
            >Telling me to think about the state of my relationship and trying to identify the root cause of my feelings is bad advice. I should cut off contact with the guy, and if I ever get feelings for someone else I'll cut off contact with them too.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            (not me)
            glad someone gets it. but I try to only give advice with the person in mind, not the benefit of others. I genuinely believe that doing that exercise will help OP in life in the long term.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >You "crushing" on someone else is entirely within your control, you just don't want to think about that because you're laying the brickwork to frick him instead of doing some self-analysis about what your priorities in life are.
            Presenting this framework of "crushes are within you control" and "all you have to do to fix a relationship is think about it rationally" seems incredibly simplistic.

            i never considered before as i didn't consider this crush to be serious before, but i do feel that it's gotten serious now. so i have been considering it in recent days, telling my bf. i have no idea what would happen, and likely it would completely crush his self-confidence. but i don't want that to happen. maybe i need to leave, because it might be that leaving would actually hurt him less. even if i love him and have always seen him as "the one" for me.
            i just want this crush to end and for everything to go back to normal, but that would bee to easy wouldn't it.
            [...]
            i don't feel like i've necessarily outgrown my bf. we are extremely close, find each other attractive, and we pretty much share all our interests and important views. what i sometimes feel like is that this might be me just longing for that excitement that eventually always goes away in long-term relationships. and i don't want to be someone who jumps from relationship to relationship, always looking for that "high". i want to be with someone for the rest of my life, that's been my goal always.

            >maybe i need to leave, because it might be that leaving would actually hurt him less. even if i love him and have always seen him as "the one" for me.
            >i just want this crush to end and for everything to go back to normal, but that would bee to easy wouldn't it.
            She seems perfectly capable of thinking about it, but it's her first relationship so that will be hard an painful.

            I know this is NSFFW, but you don't communicate like a real counselor, more like someone trying to be toxic and purposely confusing, so I think you're probably a troll.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            So we go full circle back to "I will not address the advice but how it's presented." Very well, I've clearly wasted my time, I look forward to and simultaneously dread the sob story post in a year. Good luck, you'll need it.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You expect a 22 year old girl who's probably somewhat sheltered or socially awkward and in her first relationship to want to swallow the red pill of the reality of dating that easily? And when it doesn't work, call her s ditzy bawd? Kek. Weak bait to a bait thread.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            This 100%. OP is a prostitute. Everybody here can tell. She dosent want her sister to date her friend because her trifling ass wants to frick him and cuck her boyfriend. I fricking hate prostitutes so much. On a earlier post she said “I would never cheat” and then on the next post she said “I don’t think I would cheat”. Her moral mask that she is desperately hanging on to is falling, and everybody sees it

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >the way to "take decisive action now" as you put it, would be to make sure this friend won't meet my sister.
            If you ever wondered why guys meme about "women logic", its posts like this.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Lol girls can be such selfish buttholes, but you have to appreciate this post as yet another candid report on the impulsivity and moral bankruptcy of modern women. It’s all about her. She’s acts as if she cares about her boyfriend, but she’s already committed to making the wrong decision. It’s like their logic is programmed to optimize for maximum drama and male suffering. Op if you’re reading this is the path you’re headed down
            >ignores anons advice
            >weirdly disapproves of anyone dating her bf’s boyfriend so she can continue indulging in her crush fantasy
            >inevitably breaks boyfriends heart
            >ruins boyfriends confidence and destroys his friendship with the other guy
            >moves onto another poor sucker
            I know this isn’t the kind of person you want to be.

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Foursome with sister to break the ice.

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I don't understand why this is so difficult for you. Your boyfriend 100% is attracted to and would frick/date many of the women in his life (some even sexier than you), yet he doesn't cry like a little b***h about it on NSFFW. This isn't a game and you're always going to crush on other guys no matter what relationship you're in. If you understand that and you still aren't happy with you bf, then break up with him. but if you're just going to hop from one relationship to the next then you need to grow the frick up. I mean, supposedly women are more mature than men, so what's your excuse?

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What happened to showing breasts being a requirement for girl posts to be taken seriously? Unless we get breasts and a timestamp, this thread should be treated as a LARP.

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I already told you lost thread, break up with your boyfriend. He dosent deserve to be with a shameful, backstabbing prostitute. Go spread your legs for your homosexual crush and monkey branch to the next guy cause that’s all you moronic prostitutes know.

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Its just ... are we all gonna ignore that everybody poops?

    Are people really out there making plans to get with other people who produce phat sweaty turds?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Domt ask don't tell

  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You're in a relationship and you say it's a good one and you're talking this shit? That guy deserves better than you. You will betray him eventually.

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I've been with my wife for 15 years. Been with her since MY 20s. I met one of her friends one day and thought it was love at first sight. This girl floored me and I saw the signs that she was into me. But you know what? I was with MY girl. And she's always loved me, always been good to me, would never betray me. So I shut off that lust and attraction, like you are supppsed to, and closed off the possibility of it ever occuring. That was it. We see her, her husband, and her family all the time and it's a non-issue. I love my wife, no matter what. You say this guy is good to you? Well, you aren't being very good to him. I can see that you will screw him over in the way you talk. In your heart, you already have. You're looking for any reason you can to skirt the guilt so you can proceed. If you cared about or were loyal to him, you wouldn't need to be told or would be here, again, with this situation. Get away from him before you break his heart and damage him for the NEXT woman that could have been his wife.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >adult males wife of 15 years vs 22 year old girls first relationship of a couple years
      You people are moronic, how are you not incels? I swear

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >You people are moronic, how are you not incels? I swear
        No, you're the moron. I'm convinced this is all just bait because nobody is this fricking stupid.
        >Hey guys how do I get over my crush
        >It doesn't fricking work like that dumb bawd
        >LIKE OMG THAT'S SOOOOO MEAN
        Fine, you want advice: suck it the frick up and deal with it. Tell your boyfriend about it or wait until he finds out and kicks your stupid ass to the curb himself, or go frick the other guy because it's clearly what you actually want. At this point it's a fricking troll LARP until breasts are posted.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >I've been with my wife for 15 years. Been with her since MY 20s. I met one of her friends one day and thought it was love at first sight. This girl floored me and I saw the signs that she was into me. But you know what? I was with MY girl. And she's always loved me, always been good to me, would never betray me. So I shut off that lust and attraction, like you are supppsed to, and closed off the possibility of it ever occuring. That was it.
          You expect her to do this despite her situation being world's apart from yours. You're moronic or trolling.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I'm not the person you think you're arguing with.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >"Been with her since MY 20s"
        You were saying?

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Early, mid, or late 20's? How far into the relationship with your wife did this occur? Convenient you'd leave out such pertinent info

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >"Hey, she's only 22! How dare you expect her to have values and loyalty! She's basically a toddler!"
        LOL. Shut the frick up.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          So making a thread on NSFFW is cheating. K. lol fricking idiot

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Nice. Moving the goalpost.

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Sorry to hear you’re in this situation anon. Since it sounds like you have feelings for your bf’s friend the most respectful thing to do would probably be to end the relationship with your bf and try to move on to avoid things getting too complicated, unless you think you can suppress the feelings you have for your bf’s friend and allow him to date your sister without feeling miserable about it. It also doesn’t seem fair to your bf for you to harbor secret feelings for his friend.
    I once dated a girl and ended up falling in love with her sister, I chose to keep my feelings a secret to preserve the relationship but it ultimately made me miserable and guilt ridden. I had to end the relationship and distance myself from both of them because pursuing a relationship with the sister would have driven a wedge between them and I didn’t want to be responsible for creating that kind of drama. It’s a bummer, but sometimes these things don’t work out exactly how we would like them to and you have to cut your losses and move on. Good luck.

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    God I wonder why women like you get into relationships in the first place knowing your not emotionally mature enough to handle dumb emotions.

    Break up with your BF if you have any respect for him because he deserves better than someone who has a crush on his close friend and trying to keep secrets. The fact your thinking about a crush means you don't understand why it's called a crush.

    Don't get into any more relationships with people either. At least for a few years. You have no idea what boundaries are and have zero empathy.

    How do I know? I guarantee you have not flipped the situation and considered how you would feel. Because if you did you would immediately feel disgusted with yourself.
    Go ahead and do that right now. Put yourself in his shoes. Imagine instead, your boyfriend has a crush on your close friend. Imagine all the thoughts and steps you took, he took instead. Now how would you feel about all this?

    Shitty right?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Not even OP or a woman, but, she's handling this extremely well. She understands it's just a crush, she's avoiding contact and focusing in.

      This shit happens to everyone, including men. Having a crush outside your relationship isn't disrespect. It's just nature.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Really? I don't think we're reading the same OP
        >I made a post about this situation here some time ago, and now I feel like the situation is getting out of hand.
        >My life is like a comedy at this point.
        >I have a really extreme crush on this guy-
        > I am very sure that my feelings for this guy would only deepen if he started dating my twin sister-
        >- I feel like the more I see his friend, the more this crush is turning into "oneitis" and not just a crush
        She's not handling this well at all. In fact she's losing. Waving this off as just nature takes 0 accountability. This is dealing with this kind situation actually looks like

        I've been with my wife for 15 years. Been with her since MY 20s. I met one of her friends one day and thought it was love at first sight. This girl floored me and I saw the signs that she was into me. But you know what? I was with MY girl. And she's always loved me, always been good to me, would never betray me. So I shut off that lust and attraction, like you are supppsed to, and closed off the possibility of it ever occuring. That was it. We see her, her husband, and her family all the time and it's a non-issue. I love my wife, no matter what. You say this guy is good to you? Well, you aren't being very good to him. I can see that you will screw him over in the way you talk. In your heart, you already have. You're looking for any reason you can to skirt the guilt so you can proceed. If you cared about or were loyal to him, you wouldn't need to be told or would be here, again, with this situation. Get away from him before you break his heart and damage him for the NEXT woman that could have been his wife.

        Complete opposite actions

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          She's not losing. She's concerned about her sister dating the dude bringing it closer to home, and the dude responding is clearly a lot older than she is, of course he's going to have a very different reaction. Your ability to control your emotions that well doesn't even fully solidify til 25.
          You also don't get much of the "love at fiest sight" story, how long he struggled with that. You're assuming it was instant. Could have been years.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >She's not losing.
            There is no way you read those quotes and though she's not losing? Its straight from her mouth. She is losing.

            Don't make excuses for the dude being older as he said it started when he was young too. Even still:
            >"-So I shut off that lust and attraction, like you are supppsed to, and closed off the possibility of it ever occuring"
            OP is the one in a relationship. She accepts all the responsibility that comes with it. Again, no excuses for not having accountability over her own emotions.
            The only effort she has put in is keeping it a secret. She has done nothing to manage her own dumb emotions for her crush.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >She's not losing
            NTA, but yes, she is. Provided this isn't an overly elaborate troll, this is living in her head rent-free and driving her bug frick while the simp squad rolls out to make sure she shoulders absolutely zero responsibility for how she handles it. It's not necessarily her fault for feeling that way, but regardless it's a fricking problem and she has to do something sensible about it. All of the solutions she's tried so far have been childish and ineffective, and everyone telling her exactly what she has to do to FIX the problem, not just push it to the side or kick the can down the road, but actually fricking fix it are being undermined by morons like you making every single excuse under the book hoping for some of that sweet e-pussy. Yes she's a fricking child, looks like this is a really good opportunity to learn some adult skills like everyone suggested instead of just shrugging and tossing an "it is what it is" while her life spirals out of control.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Shes reached a point where she has to do something about it and if you read the thread you'd understand that she's likely going to. So why the frick are you still whining?

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Have you tried telling your sister?

  14. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    you’re going to be attracted to a ton of men throughout your life. if you left your bf and got with his friend, you’ll be back to exactly the same situation you are now. because you’ll always want something new and different
    there are men out there you’d never get bored with, but they will abandon you after a frick or two. no girl will ever have those men and they will either die alone or theyll settle when theyre very old for a end of life partner
    realize the game and choose a direction that’s not going to waste your best years in this trap

  15. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    this is the third thread on this
    what the frick is wrong with you

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >woman is moronic
      many such cases

  16. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If you were a man, I'd say just go jerk off and she'll be out of your mind after that.

  17. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Stop being a selfish cheating prostitute. That's how.
    Bitch...

  18. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Guys I think I figured her out. Her saying she doesn't want him to meet her sister is in fact a lie disguised as a solution to HER dilemma. She subconsciously wants to frick him but if he dated her sister her moral compass would absolutely not allowed her to do that. That means her best option is to get her together with her sister but like I said she doesn't want to do that.
    Additional her boyfriend is a tertiary character in this story behind her sister just shows how much she cares about him.

    So just to translate I want to frick my boyfriend's friend but I can't because he is my boyfriend's friend and that someone wants to meet my sister who is my twin so that makes me even more wet coz it's like he wants to frick me. So give me advice how to not do it but at the same time tell me it's perfectly normal if it happens.

  19. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You sound like a child who isn't in control over your emotions
    Just fricking forget about your crush unless you want to ruin everything

    Not just your relationship, but their friendship, your crushes potential relationship and any friends caught between the schism

  20. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    So many betas ITT. "wahhh you're gonna crush his heart." LMAO get fricked beta b***h bois.

  21. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    These horror stories are getting better and better. Good reminder to never fall for the emotional attachment meme, because she certainly wont lol

  22. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I read almost the whole thread and I would say you are bored from your current looser boyfriend like other anons already suggested. Beeing in a long term exclusive relationship is a choice that comes from within and can't be faked. So the question you have to ask yourself is do you really want your current boyfriend, is he so important to you that you can supress those feelings can you really imagine beeing with him let's say for the next 5 years?
    Because I honestly think the answer is no. Also you are probably too young for this, most people your age frick around and find out and settle later.
    With experience in your pocket and knowing what you like want and who you are more or less you migt9be ready for a long term relationship.
    Good luck.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Great advice, champ.
      >You're too young for your long-term relationship despite the overwhelming bulk of human civilization had people married with multiple kids at this time
      >You're obviously bored with your relationship because it will literally always happen once the honeymoon period dries up and it's no longer "new and exciting" but rather routine.
      >No, no it's much better for you leave a long-term committed relationship with someone who probably cares for you, go get your holes blown out, and then settle down for somebody enough of a cuck to be okay with that that you'll probably resent for being such a gay

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >implying there's any good options
        kys tradcuck.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Recommending someone doesn't hop on a hundred dicks and settle down with somebody they'll resent is being trad
          The only cuck here is you. You're the homosexual coping about how you'd rather date a bawd because she knows what she's doing because you don't think you deserve better, and you're probably right on that front.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            monogamy is for having a raising kids up until theyre 18. not for being happy.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You're right, happiness is just orgasms and excitement. When I get bored of my current boyfriend, I'll break up with him and move on to the next one until he gets boring. Surely at no point will this logic come to bite me in the ass when I'm not as pretty. Surely the established guy in my age range would want somebody like me and not the twenty-something starbucks barista, because what I offer is so much better.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        But that's literally the way she is heading lol. It's not like I'm talking out of my ass I can feel that she doesn't like her current nolifer boyfriend only the way she writes.
        What's the purpose of staying with someone just because of morals? Idiot c**t. She is too young and indecisive for a long term relationship.

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >What's the purpose of staying with someone just because of morals?
          Breaking up with someone because you do not enjoy their company is a very different beast from "monogamy is [...] not for being happy." You're offering a poison pill and calling it a cure. The advice others gave of "you need to figure out your priorities in life and whether or not your current relationship meets your needs" is much better than the poison pill you're offering. The point of dating is to find long-term partners, that's not called being "trad" that's called not being a fricking idiot wasting the best years of your life on meaningless sex and then scrambling to find the love of your life when his options are the 22-year-old lusting after him or some chick on the cusp of 30 with more mileage than a '99 Honda Civic.

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