Ive been toying with seeing an escort, but I can't follow through with it because I am afraid I will be ashamed and regret it afterwards.

Ive been toying with seeing an escort, but I can't follow through with it because I am afraid I will be ashamed and regret it afterwards. Is this reasonable or should I say frick it and do it?

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I think it be same as having anxiety over going to starbucks; it happens to people, but really you're just buying goods and services like any other. As long as you're not looking for true love, but good sex you should be set

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >As long as you're not looking for true love, but good sex you should be set
      Yea given up on the love thing so really I just want a good sexual experience, but the societal based shame is something that worries me. Im afraid the post nut clarity is going to be suicidal levels

      if you just dont want to be scared of sex anymore and you want to do it with girls you meet afterwards do it.
      If its just to loose your virginity but you dont frick other girls afterwards (without paying). Dont do it you will regret it and you will loose something very valuable even for many women.

      >if you just dont want to be scared of sex anymore and you want to do it with girls you meet afterwards do it.
      Yea I am not a virgin, but the limited sexual experience I have had has ruined sex for me. Im terrified of it and am unable to connect with anyone sexually. That was one reason I wanted to visit an escort, I dont have to play the game I can just enjoy the sexual experience. At least thats the idea.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Implying anything in the world would change from your activities in the bedroom. Nobody is none the wiser if you don't openly advertise it to people who would judge you for it

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >Nobody is none the wiser if you don't openly advertise it to people who would judge you for it
          I agree with you, but I am just such an anxious person that I hate having secrets I know someone would judge me for. At the same time though, I do feel like the right experience with the right escort might do me a lot of good. Thats kind of where I am at right now.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            You shouldn't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. There will always people who would judge your any action negatively, you can't not piss off billions of people at once

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >You shouldn't set yourself on fire to keep others warm
            Story of my life man lol, probably wouldnt be in this position if that wasnt what I normally do

            >There will always people who would judge your any action negatively
            True, and of random people I dont care, I just think about what if my friends found out, or a future partner? It feels like crossing a boundary that I will then have to hide from the people in my life forever. At the same time though I think it might be the only thing that can help me actually start towards healthy sexuality

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I'd categorize 'getting found out' of having had sex with a hooker before as unlikely. Besides unless your friends and family are ultra religious I'd wager it's not something you'll end up in a cross for. World today is not nearly as prudish as it was when your grandmother was around.

            I do see great potential in getting rid of your anxieties with a professional this way

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >I do see great potential in getting rid of your anxieties with a professional this way
            I do as well, I really like the idea of being able to enjoy sex in an environment that I dont have to worry about performance anxiety and all that shit. Just pay and frick

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >Transactional intimacy is totally healthy!
            Whatever helps you sleep at night.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Putting words into mouths of others is not very nice

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I cant enjoy authentic intimacy because I am terrified of it, the idea is to get over that

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            So men shouldn't pay for any of their girlfriends things? Got it.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >but the societal based shame is something that worries me.
        Do you live in some tiny, ultraconservative Italian village where everyone greets you by name or in some Arabian shithole?
        Literally no one will even know that you've visited a prostitute. Always remember that the prostitute also doesn't want everyone to know what she's doing.

        >Im afraid the post nut clarity is going to be suicidal levels
        It wont

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >conservatives
          Always mind their own business and don't care.

          "Social issues" = leftist busybody losers.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    You should do it, but you will regret it afterwards.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Only if you were looking for the wrong thing. It can be great if you're looking for sex and general degenerancy as a service

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    if you just dont want to be scared of sex anymore and you want to do it with girls you meet afterwards do it.
    If its just to loose your virginity but you dont frick other girls afterwards (without paying). Dont do it you will regret it and you will loose something very valuable even for many women.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >something very valuable
      How mysterious. But if you know what that is, why not just tell everyone here?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I believe anon was referring to virginity, or at least a sort of “sexual innocence”. The women who aren’t prostitutes do indeed tend to like it.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          There is no way to measure sexual innocence. If you don't tell someone about it, they won't know about it. You can frick however many people you want and still get married 'pure'

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            They're not a virgin, but they could be saying that. Or they could not be a virgin but saying they are. There's no way to know. In my opinion a metric is useless if it can't be measured

            you notice it tho

            also women bleed

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            How do you measure someone's virginity, then?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            wdym? If i pen a girl and it obv hurts her and she starts to bleed shes pretty sure a virgin?
            With men there is no sure way of saying but if hes confident and kinda knows what to do its pretty sure hes had sex bfore

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            If you're referring to a hymen, it can both be severed by any object, by itself or regrow, or both. It's in no case a valid way to prove someone is a virgin

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            ofc there i no 100% way of knowing and a hymen can rip through various ways. Still most people are kinda honest when it comes to sex and even if they werent you would notice if they have experience or if they dont. You are just doing a weird cope keep on beeing a non-sex-haver

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I simply don't think something relying purely on honesty is a valid way to measure anything. While your ability in bed is easily noticed, it's origin is as obscure as you want it to be. There aren no ways to reveal someone's history if they won't give it to you

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I'm pretty sure OP means his anal virginity?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        staying a virgin??????

        >As long as you're not looking for true love, but good sex you should be set
        Yea given up on the love thing so really I just want a good sexual experience, but the societal based shame is something that worries me. Im afraid the post nut clarity is going to be suicidal levels

        [...]
        >if you just dont want to be scared of sex anymore and you want to do it with girls you meet afterwards do it.
        Yea I am not a virgin, but the limited sexual experience I have had has ruined sex for me. Im terrified of it and am unable to connect with anyone sexually. That was one reason I wanted to visit an escort, I dont have to play the game I can just enjoy the sexual experience. At least thats the idea.

        just go for it then. They are professionals and if you stay respectful you can just tell them what you would like to do and theyll tell you their dos and donts.
        After all its their work

        Implying anything in the world would change from your activities in the bedroom. Nobody is none the wiser if you don't openly advertise it to people who would judge you for it

        it changes your OWN happiness (wow!!!)

        I believe anon was referring to virginity, or at least a sort of “sexual innocence”. The women who aren’t prostitutes do indeed tend to like it.

        correct 🙂

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          They're not a virgin, but they could be saying that. Or they could not be a virgin but saying they are. There's no way to know. In my opinion a metric is useless if it can't be measured

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If she's had legs like that I wouldn't judge you negatively.

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    No one cares about your virginity, people on this site put way too much stock in being a virgin. It literally has never mattered for men. The concept of virginity is for women only, it was a means to ensure you are not raising some other guys baby in an age before pregnancy tests, oral contraceptives and paternity tests, and when you had to marry her before you could sleep with her if you wanted everything above board.
    It's utterly irrelevant to everyone in the modern world. Pretty easy to find out if you're in a relationship with a pregnant woman these days.
    Classically men have never thought of their first time having sex as something special to treasure. That some are starting to is a very recent phenomenon, it's previously been the domain of women. This idea of the first time having sex being special has always just been a means to use psychology to affect a young woman's behaviour and delay her sexual activity. Sex for women is more risky than it is for men,. Women can get pregnant from sex, men can not.
    You do no one any favours by "waiting for marriage", statistically marriages where the couple are also each other's first sexual experience have an exceptionally high failure rate.
    Should you frick hookers as OP suggests? That's for you to decide, I wouldn't but I value my health and dignity, plus free sex is easy to come by. Your mileage may vary however.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >This idea of the first time having sex being special has always just been a means to use psychology to affect a young woman's behaviour and delay her sexual activity

      Ok. What does that say to you about a woman in her 30s who has been in a relationship before, had sex against her prior choice to wait until marriage, and who now wants again to wait until marriage to have sex?

      Is she:
      a) ultra religious and stuck in the past
      b) simply afraid of sex and using it as a cover
      c) merely afraid of being impregnated outside a marriage and having to abort or take care of a child on her own?
      d) just too naiive to know that marrying someone you've never fricked is risky?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >who has been in a relationship before
        roastie toastie who gives a frickoastie?

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    All escort prices I looked up were laughably expensive for some black pig or some ugly white girl that uses a bunch of wording to make it such that she doesn't need to actually frick you for paying her. It's easier and cheaper to sleep with way better looking women.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      This is the case in America.
      They are literally thousands of dollars an hour, not to mention require references, personal and employment information, and ID.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Its crazy how American women are insufferable even when selling their pussy. They are the worst women in the world

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    dont do it. once you start viewing sex as a commodity to be bought and sold you will never trust a woman with real intimacy ever again.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >you will never trust a woman with real intimacy ever again.
      Ok but what if I already dont trust women with intimacy?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        then you can either suffer detached from it forever or work on figuring your shit out now.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >work on figuring your shit out now.
          I am trying to work on it, the escort idea was part of that process

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Former escort here. What is it about paying for a sex service that you worry you might be ashamed of and regret? The fact that you paid for it instead of having a girl have sex with you without monetary transaction?

    A lot of women are turned off by the idea of their man having paid for sex in the past, for whatever reason. Be ready to limit your romantic options if you plan on being honest, or take it to the grave.

    Honestly though, get an escort out of curiosity's sake or just for sex itself, but not because you think it will improve your sexual skills or make you better with women or "understand women". A lot of escorts will fake it with you anyway.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >What is it about paying for a sex service that you worry you might be ashamed of and regret?
      Honestly, I have no personal problem with it, its the societal view of me that worries me. Having to hide it from my friends and future partners (if Im lucky) because otherwise they will view me negatively because of the cultural taboo

      >get an escort out of curiosity's sake or just for sex itself, but not because you think it will improve your sexual skills or make you better with women
      The reasons I want to get an escort are two-fold. To experience sex thats enjoyable, because all of my previous experiences have been traumatically bad, and to hopefully get over my fear of sex by having positive sexual experiences.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I understand. I've been with virgins before and I think vast majority of clients (all types) never talk about their use of escort services with their male friends either. People do a lot of things in private that they don't have to share with EVERYONE in their lives, like going to swinger or BDSM clubs, porn preferences, and medical needs such as needing to take certain medications to get by, taking testosterone shots, or having a medical diagnosis where you shit in a diaper but nobody else knows, etecetera.

        Honestly if we knew everything about everyone from the getgo, nobody would get married.

        >To experience sex thats enjoyable

        Unfortunately that's not a guarantee either, no matter how the escort advertises herself or how much her services are. It really depends on the escort, just like dating. Some escorts will be very accomodating and have great bedside manners, and know how to make you comfortable. Other escorts won't. What was so traumatic about your experiences with the vanilla women?

        Generally I recommend escorts past the age of 25 because they have better social skills than younger ones. Maybe get an escort who is like 28-40 if you're anywhere between 18-40. I've been with men who were much younger than me. Some almost a decade younger.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >People do a lot of things in private that they don't have to share
          I know, this just seems like a big thing to omit. Everyone watches porn, but most young guys dont see escorts

          >Some escorts will be very accomodating and have great bedside manners, and know how to make you comfortable
          For sure its no guarantee, but I was looking for ones who advertised themselves specifically for guys like me, lonely, shy, nerdy types. I found this one in my area who is pretty and specifically wrote in her post about socially awkward inexperienced guys.

          >What was so traumatic about your experiences with the vanilla women?
          Lots of things, from being laughed at in bed, to being pressured into it by women. I have only maybe had a handful of good sexual experiences, the vast majority were really bad

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If you're in the USA it's not worth it.
    They are all fat or old (or both) and you're risking your career and reputation since it's illegal and they will try to screw with you if you get caught. You're also risking your life because it could be Black folk mugging people.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Idk where you're located but in the USA its shit

    I was looking up stings in my local area lol and its fricked how they'll post the mugshots of the guys online for the world to see, kek

    I've been going to Tijuana

    Damn this new girl I've been seeing is a fave of mine now

    This pale white skinned latina from one of the brothels, she's there mainly in the day from 12ish to 7pm

    She was dressed as a waitress the last time I saw her, but we went up and fricked

    She gets into it and cuddles and starts kissing me on the ear and licking my neck and ear

    She was riding me and the bar people were knocking on the room since the time was up but she just pushed me back down and kept riding me for a good while after, she said "where are you going" in spanish lol and then fricking kept riding me

    I just pay the brothel people for another 30 minutes or hour, I stayed in the room with her for 2.5 hours

    God damn this b***h is kinky, she was also choking me pretty good and then i choked her

    But thats a Tijuana experience and you wouldnt find that in the USA without paying a hefty tax

    Either way if you're already thinking about it like you are then you probably might not even get hard if you do end up booking

    So you should take that into consideration before you pay and end up not getting a boner due to nervousness/overthinking everything

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      What is is like in Tijuana if you're gringo like me?

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    OP, my experience is identical to yours, and I ended up seeing two hookers. I had incredible, crippling anxiety surrounding sex before I lost my virginity (to a hooker at the age of 29). I’m going to bed now but if you are reading this, I’ll be back visiting this thread in about 8 hours. We can swap emails and I can talk you through what happened and swap thoughts. My mentality was EXACTLY the same as yours and maybe I therefore represent your future self in a strange way.

    Basically, I have a gf now but feel guilty in the back of my mind for having seen two hookers, even though if I hadn’t seen those hookers I would never have had the confidence to pursue the relationship I am in. Do reply to this if you’d like a conversation via burner email. For future reference, I’m from England. Also, by the by, do you have OCD?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Mayate

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Thanks for sharing anon, I would like to discuss it more

      > Also, by the by, do you have OCD?
      Yup lol, how did you know?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I’ve set up a burner email: [email protected]

        I’ll try to help in any way I can if you have questions

        >how did you know?

        Because I have OCD and it causes the same thought patterns that you are describing. Normal people don’t think the way we do

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Thanks anon I reached out to you.

          >Normal people don’t think the way we do
          I hate having OCD lol

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            My burner email didn’t let me reply to you so I’ve created a Mail.com account that will allow me to compose emails

            Yeah OCD is a fricking curse that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            I’ve sent an email to your email address

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    If you set your expectations low, at least you won't be disappointed. I've also thought about visiting a prostitute.
    Your question is valid though. A lot of men have visited prostitutes, but it's a taboo subject and no one shares their experience. Especially if it was a bad one. Also a lot of women have been prostitutes, marriage could also be a form of prostitution. Being supported by sugar daddies. But that's not talked about.

    Society teaches us that paying for sex is despicable. But when I think about for example physically or mentally impaired people, the only way for them to have some intimacy is payment. Maybe first you should get rid of this unnecessary shame by means of therapy or self-introspection? I think in some cases visiting a prostitute is fine.

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