>keep pushing people away. >never make meaningful connections. >hate dealing with people

>keep pushing people away
>never make meaningful connections
>hate dealing with people
>yet I want to have friends
Why am I like this?

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  1. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    The desire for relationships is pure weakness. Everyone is evil and selfish, and if you ever put yourself out there, you will get chewed up and spit out.

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      maybe you just need some low maintenance friends? i have like one solid conversation per month with the people i care about and that maintains the relationship pretty well. i wish i was much closer with them, but i don't put in the work (for similar reasons as you) and they just accept that i'm going to be hard to reach most of the time.

      i can't ever tell if these anons are serious
      if so i hope you feel better soon

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        but to answer your question literally, you have a biological need for community and acceptance. good luck turning that off.

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      based objectivist.
      Frick relationships, involve yourself thoroughly in artistic and intellectual purposes, and not in frivolous sessions where you and your buddies need to go drinking in a bar, or playing vidya. They aren't friends. Most people do NOT have it in themselves to be friends.

      • 1 week ago
        Anonymous

        How do I go on about actively seeking for such relationships?

  2. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Lack of beatings

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      I had more beatings than I can count. I did a lot of stupid shit as a kid.

  3. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    hedgehog's dilemma.

  4. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    This is me too. I hate this so much
    Where did I go wrong? I could have had so many beautiful moments and relationships by now

  5. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Maybe online rpg ?
    That way you can meet people in an imaginary context then upgade with your feelings or with people on the same page .

    Good luck op , i have a similar problem and think i'll try rpg

  6. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    I have kinda the same problem, don't have any really close friends but I wish I had. At the same time I'm an introvert, and putting myself out there and actually being social drains my energy really fast. There was once a time when I wished I would have more time alone. Gosh I wish that time back, now I'm so lonely I wanna die... Wish you well anon.

  7. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Freetoattach (dot) com

  8. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    I'm very similar OP. I utterly despise people, yet I yearn for the connection. I don't want people to know me, yet I want to be known. I easily get tired and sick of people, their flaws and personalities really start to irritate me the longer I'm with them.
    Did you have a relatively traumatic childhood, or were you often alone in childhood? I spent my formative years being bullied and alone, and I never had any friends in school. Regardless, we probably suffer from the same psychological issue, maybe some kind of personality disorder, of which I'm not sure.

  9. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    people make terrible friends. get a dog. you could even save a life.

  10. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Your key goal is the avoidance of shame that comes from being unworthy.
    You solve this in the short term by avoiding people.
    In the long term, you remain unworthy by doing this.
    And you simply do not take the smart solution to these problems.

    • 1 week ago
      Anonymous

      this is the closest answer so far
      I'm in a similar situation and have been reading up on it - it all stems from defensive and avoidant behaviour.
      Somewhere in you there is a reason you push people away and don't like dealing with them - it might be because you fear rejection, you don't like not being in control, you don't think you are worthy of being loved, you hate yourself etc.
      You are choosing to hide away because you feel anxiety, shame or guilt during moments where you try to address your need for friends.
      It's a big meme, but did your parents show you love and affection as a child? Did they validate your feelings? Most likely the feelings you have now are ones you had as a child too because you weren't shown the right way to handle your emotions.
      Low maintenance friends are not the answer here, its not the people your seeking who need to change, its you. I've got low maintenance friends from years back and honestly I wish I didn't because they give me nothing, and they feed into my feelings of low self esteem because I know they don't care about me the way I feel a need to be cared about.

      Basically - stop bottling your emotions, look back at your anxieties as a kid, address them and let out your feelings of anxiety, shame, and guilt, which allows you to be more comfortable with them, as well as all other emotions before you can feel confident in yourself again.

  11. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    Most likely avoidant attachment, either dismissive or fearful. I'd recommend therapy of the same gender, so that you don't develop romantic feelings for your therapist.

  12. 1 week ago
    Anonymous

    you're looking for gold nuggets in a pile of shit anon
    get stronger get better
    elevate your friend circle
    then you'll find friends that are actually beneficial, even then, be careful, don't get swindled

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