Baby is 8 weeks old and perfect, he’s been sleeping through the night since like 3-4 weeks old. He’s very happy, alert, cute, big and overall much easier than I expected/some.
What I did not expect is how hard this would be on my wife, just everything.
We’re fighting all the time over the stupidest shit. Overall we’re both over-attentive parents, but I’m a little more laissez faire about parenthood in an effort to keep myself sane. I actually tried to do everything her way, but her ways keep changing anyway, so it seemed futile and they arnt all her decisions to make, especially when she’s being brain washed by Reddit nonsense.
She wants to read everything online, and normally I’m similar and want to do things correctly and benefit from the collective experience the internet give us, but baby information online is just trivial overload of antidotal information and bullshit. It seems almost pointless in some ways to look things up, but I’ll digress.
I think adapting to the change is harder for her to handle, whereas I’ve taken to everything in stride. She’s unable to accomplish anything when she is watching him (my expectations are very low, like throw away your own trash, feed yourself when I’m gone, etc) which didn’t bug me at first. Now though I feel like I’m doing everything, all the cleaning all the cooking shopping dishes laundry etc etc. It’s really starting to ware me down and on top of that she’s been harder to deal with than the baby and even when we have a sitter she is refusing to do anything or leave the house.
I think it’s a post-partum issue but I don’t know how to help her, she doesn’t want to help her self, she doesn’t want my help either. If she isn’t upset because of something involving the baby she’s upset about me doing too much. The only person she might listen to besides me is her mom, but I’m afraid dragging her/our issues to her mom will further drive the wedge between us.