To all the anons looking to get women

A lot of you anons really need to stop what you're doing towards dating/finding women. What you've been doing so far is not working (as seen by dozens of these posts on here). It's far more simple than you are making it. Just stop coming off like you've never spoken to a woman before/are a serial killer/have no luck with women.
Keep in mind this simple truth: you are the prize. Now go and prove it
You can prove this by being well spoken, witty, decently fit, confident, wienery but not *too* wienery, and have interesting hobbies.
>be light hearted
>give the perception of spontaneity
>smile
>have fun with the dating process
You're going to face rejection sometimes, that's just a lesson in honing your style.

Some reading that will help you out:
"Practical female psychology, for the practical man" - Joseph South
"The Game" - Neil Strauss
Every man has it within themselves to improve their circumstances... however that process starts with the self. The gym will only get you so far, hone your mind, and your social skills. Then watch the world become your oyster.

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Is having a gf even worth all of this hassle? Why not just give up?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Life isn't about having it on easy mode (there's no feeling of completion there) it's more about having the tools, knowledge, and honed ability to put yourself where you want to be.
      Fire forges steel, so does adversity forge men. Not too dissimilar to the Chrisitan teaching "as fire forges iron, so does man hone men"
      Eh, it is and it isn't. Depends on what you want out of interactions with women. Either way, at the very least: every man can benefit from learning how to use charm to get what you want out of life, especially when it comes to benefitting from interactions with women.
      >another really helpful book "the 48 laws of power"

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Life isn't about having it on easy mode (there's no feeling of completion there)
        Different anon, here. But there's the feeling of peace and freedumbs (for not being tied to a woman and kids, not having to work so much and so hard). You have more money and time for yourself. You can enjoy your family and friends. You don't have to worry about in-laws.
        I honestly can't see having a gf/wife as a good deal.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Absolutely agree. A lot of people here are not at peace. Feels like they're living the stereotype of wanting to keep up with the Jones'. I will say that having a good woman at your side does indeed make life that much easier, if they're with the cause. Nothing wrong at all with not wanting to coordinate with another to that capacity, but the main theme is to find what makes you happy/ feel complete, and then thrive in it. Personally I'm a little disheartened by the vast amount of our guys on the internet who force themselves to be unhappy with their individual circumstances, and then do nothing to improve it

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I think the biggest problem plaguing a lot of men is where to find them. There aren't really many places past school (and work which is a bad idea) where you can have a low pressure social environment, further there's the added bonus of repeat interactions. Cold approach is not ideal in my opinion because you have a lot of different factors to navigate to put the woman at ease and sell yourself, it also comes off as desperate. In my opinion, the people I've met in bars and clubs aren't generally the greatest material either. So idk, I welcome any suggestions because I don't want to just erect problems without solutions. That being said, I agree with

          Absolutely agree. A lot of people here are not at peace. Feels like they're living the stereotype of wanting to keep up with the Jones'. I will say that having a good woman at your side does indeed make life that much easier, if they're with the cause. Nothing wrong at all with not wanting to coordinate with another to that capacity, but the main theme is to find what makes you happy/ feel complete, and then thrive in it. Personally I'm a little disheartened by the vast amount of our guys on the internet who force themselves to be unhappy with their individual circumstances, and then do nothing to improve it

          The Bible has a part about the difference between a good woman and a bad woman that currently escapes me, but the main point is that living with a bad woman is worse than being alone. Where I feel bad for our incel friends is that it takes experience to really appreciate that, and in that sense it truly is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. I can tell you that so many people get sick of their partner and there is still peace to be had alone, but it's like you have to ascend the mountain to see that it's the same on the other side.

          All that being said, it's still hard for even me to find mental equilibrium. I have had relationships, I exercise, I have hobbies, I have kids, I've been successful in my career, I meditate, I've done therapy, but it doesn't seem to matter sometimes, this lonely feeling comes creeping back, confusion with social contacts, the desire to isolate.

          So idk, maybe that's how life is.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >I think the biggest problem plaguing a lot of men is where to find them.

            A symptom of income inequality - the women ARE there , its just too expensive to get to where they are for a reasonable price. All the cope about fancy outdoor hobbies and shit are just a money filter , so she knows you aren't dirt poor basically. All the fashion and looksmaxxing is similar concept + proving you're attractive.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            she can show up in a $20 dress off FashionNova or SHEIN and maybe $100 of makeup and expect the other guy to pay for food and the experience and just do some cardio and call it a day.

            He's gotta invest like 1Y into a high quality protein diet to build enough muscle for a manly frame , move outta his parents house in this economy which requires like 2Y of trades minimum or 4Y bachelors for key fields and pay stupid rent money, put like $2K into a wardrobe that fits minimum when a quality leather jacket alone is like $600.

            Only unemployed guys I see pull are my tall bois , and jeremy meeks face level dudes and you 5 9-5 10 ers who think you are "short" but look giant to some 4 11 chick.

            Just to get "nah you're too short" or too autist

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Take the enlistment pill, anon. All the protein and exercise tou can handle, plus you'll get stories on stories afterwards. More to your actual point: it really does not cost that much to get a new wardrobe... well if you want to wear designer everything it does. My jeans are wrangler or Levi from Walmart, sometimes I get shirts off Amazon, or kohl's. I got a 80 dollar pleather jacket from some Chinese knockoff company a few years ago (its gotten the most compliments out of all my jackets) doesn't really cost too much to find decent stuff. However, if someone's going to cast aspersions about it, they're superficial and you can use that as a litmus test to filter out the ones who aren't quality.
            Lol I've actually never thought I was short at 5'9. As far as protein goes: whey is cheap, and so is fish/ground beef/chicken thighs

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Define reasonable price... not trying to diminish your point, but it really does not cost that much to get to where the women you want are, if it costs anything. It's really not even a metric of having the flashiest clothes.. just wear clean ones (obviously) in a semi-form fitting manner, or form fitting. Looks do matter, but your "rizz" or your "game" is the real money maker

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            it costs at least a car where I live anon , you can't be pulling up off the subway unless you live in a NYC. It's the same about an apartment. Living with your parents is well and good in college but after 25 its a very bad look

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            What hobbies are costing a car note, these days? I must be out of the loop

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            you know what I mean anon, dont sidestep the point - you think you gonna pick up your girl on your e-scooter gimme a break

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            You could, why not? Why put that much weight into the exchange? Give it a shot and if it doesn't work out the most you're likely to encounter is a polite rejection, maybe in the most extreme cases something more pointed. Even though I doubt that would happen, it would say more about that person and what they've got going on than about you.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Lol oh I get what you're saying man. But let's be real: if you make it fun, who really cares? I've had a few cars in my life now, a few cheap, and a few discount luxury, but I can tell you unequivocally: zero of them have gotten me laid, unless it was in the backseat.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            I feel that. Definitely agree about the cold approach, being less than ideal but also suprisingly forgiving. While it's successful sometimes, It's still a gamble... but opens up for spontaneity, and thinking on your toes (so long as you aren't taking it too seriously)
            Idk what industry you work in, but I have dated around with some of the chicks at the hospital I used to work at (didn't have to see them all the time, and there are a disproportionate amount of women to men) good part is that most of them have their shit together, but also a lot of them are a wee bit crazy, very well could find a diamond there.
            There's tons of wisdom in the Bible, as it shows us some very timeless concepts that perfectly encompass human behavior, and what to hold as a standard. Well said, the mountain does have two very similar sides to it. Reminds me of this concept I learned when I was in the Corps: complacency kills. How thst applies here, is without a secular goal to strive towards (and share in cooperation) anything is doomed to stagnate, and become tedious in its routine. In that aspect it would probably work out best to keep setting goals or accomplishments at a more elevated level, as the last is attained. Not dissimilar with adding purpose on top of purpose. Definitely does feel like life is a big old struggle towards something meaningful, and that's what it is... but in truth it's the adversity that makes it worth it. Like I recommended to the other anon, maybe looking into trt would give you that added oomph. I've seen it basically make guys feel like a new man, with renewed vitality

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Thanks for the thoughtful reply. My only hangup with the cold approach is that the only thing you'd know about the woman is her looks, which is a good starting point but in my life I've met a great deal of women that by knowing a few things about them I wouldn't be interested. I know this is the point of dating but in a way it seems like a heavily invested way of going about it, but I guess it's better than nothing. I was also in a more female dominated field so I get what you're saying there. As far as goals, I seem to alternate between trying to set a lofty goal, being a perfectionist that gets burnt out, then finding peace in letting go of goals for a time, so I'm sure I need some balance there. Maybe I can try again SMART goals. I do agree that there is an element of honing through difficulty. Thanks for your kind words.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Of course, anon. From my experiences (I'm sure same as yours) I've encountered things from a woman's past, or displayed behavior that was very off-putting. Completely correct, the cold approach doesn't allow for feeling them out as a person, but then again that does give the opportunity for the very basis of dating: courtship... in that, this is the time to learn that individual inside and out (haha)
            I'm the same way about having to make things perfect, but I have learned to intentionally leave things (that are noncritical) imperfect, so I have a reminder to keep my equilibrium centered towards realism. "You can't master everything, but you can certainly try" is something I'll practice living with imperfection. At the very least, it's a reminder to strive for the unattainable, and a lifeline to not be dissatisfied with anything less than perfect. We're only human, at the end of the day

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Life isn't about having it on easy mode (there's no feeling of completion there)
        Having things work smoothly and efficiently is very satisfying.

        • 2 months ago
          Op

          True. Are you really going to ever value something that was just handed to, more than something which you've attained solely by your own hand?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      y not revolt with force or atleast go ER?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      This question right here sums up the real problem going on - inequality of upbringing.

      The guys saying “it’s only a haircut and some social skills away bro” had a slightly better hand then they want to admit and even if it wasn’t financially , it could be as simple as having freedom as a youth. Many incels I suspect are ethnics under the thumb of their parents,

      And the guys who ask this question , are asking it with the full brunt of their existence on their shoulders. Having to take care of parents , bills they can never get ahead of , the autism inequality, ADHD, etc etc.

      And basically talking over each other

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I've met far more incels of European descent, than those of ethnic. It's a skill issue, not a race one. No one wants to put up with the spastic or socially unpleasant person... there are literal ways to mitigate that (it has to be done by the person in question) Really surprising that your point is "well those guys have responsibilities" as if having such is a mutually exclusive situation, as if everyone's lives aren't nearly as complex as eachothers. In my experience, it's quite easy to see the success of others, but not so the effort that it took to get there.
        I can really only speak for myself in some of these regards... I'm 5'9 and mixed trinidadian who lived with very strict parents while growing up... according to NSFFW, I should be an incel. Really surprising that it's not so? Not really, it's simply a skill issue. Pretty much did what every other kid my age (at the time did) I just snuck out when I felt the need to do so. Did martial arts, and was just not socially moronic.
        The point being, is that women are not complicated creatures, and their behavior is almost always predictable. Just pay attention

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          u've met incels who're adamant that they'll only date whites. white men are literally the most attractive men on the planet

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Kek, surely you can post your face w/ timestamp
            I've fricked far more white women than brown... it's a skill issue bud. What's your excuse for being an incel?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I’m the original poster not the the whites guy, I’m curious - do you degen max ? Like drink , party etc ?

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            No you aren't lol, I'm op you raggedy b***h

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            ohh I thought you were trinidad man nvm

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            I'm both lol been american since birth too, and spent time in the Marine Corps. At which time I most definitely drank and partied a lot while in garrison. Not so much these days, because I have plenty of responsibility... yet still manage to find tail when I wanted to

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            yep full assimilation , every ethnic "slayer" I've ever known was basically a cultural white guy in a brown body

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            As I've said several times, it's a skill issue bud. Not my fault you're not on my level, I've given you the tools to get to where i am. You have no excuse, according to /misc/ logic, why aren't you doing better than I am? Pretty crazy how what country you live in, doesn't dictate your success

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Pretty much did what every other kid my age (at the time did) I just snuck out when I felt the need to do so.
          >low inhibition

          >Did martial arts
          >did a sport instead of playing video games and browsing imageboards all day

          >and was just not socially moronic.
          >not autistic
          You were literally already better off than everyone here. Your upbringing was tailor-made to not be a loser.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            No one said I didn't play video games and build computers (I've probably built more than you, but this is not a competition)
            >and now that you have the recipe for success, what's your excuse for staying as you are?

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Just improve your looks as much as you can and make it look effortless.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You'd be surprised how much a haircut, well kept facial hair, and a wardrobe change would do for you. Unironically, it's that easy

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        yes a 200 dollar haircut will give me high cheekbones and a sharp wide jawline and give me a late growth spurt

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          You're an absolute goober if you're paying 200 bucks for a fade. But out of curiosity, post your face, you seriously can't be that unattractive

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >jaw
          or beard

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          It'd also give you a house, a job, $200k in savings, AND a free car. Brrm brrm.

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >stop what you're doing
    most incels I know aren't doing anything. that's the problem.
    they are waiting for a girlfriend to magically fall into their lap.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      It's a serious bummer. Really blows my mind that these dudes don't realize that they're the only ones standing in their way.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        that's crazy
        my favorites are the
        >but no woman ever shows signs of interest
        ones
        dude, YOU have to make her interested in you. that's your job as a male wtf

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I agree with your point but that's huge cope. women DO show signs of interest. they have to skirt the line of being too open and being seen as easy and too subtle ( because they know most men have the social awareness of a rock)

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >having to put effort to get someone who will spend my money and divorce rape me
          No, thanks.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Prenup, my homie. Also put your major assets in your mom's name, or any legal entity you can create for yourself (for like 100 bucks)

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            That doesn't really work, nowadays.

            im not trying anything to get women that's the problem. even leaving my bed is too much work these days

            why are you even in this thread then?

            To see if anyone changes my mind.
            That said, I have a crush on a single mom who divorce raped a man and this crush frustrates the shit out of me.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Yes it does. I'd like you to explain how you can lose something In a divorce, when you have no legal claim to it, as it's not your property (on paper, the only thing that establishes legal ownership)
            Perhaps she isn't the one you should be considering any type of lasting relationship with.... there is such a thing as a "recreational use only" woman, as there is a "till death do us part" wife.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            In my country, if they get evidence that you're the actual owner (you're the one who uses it, lives in it, etc.), they can do something about it (unless your lawyers are much better than hers). They are also using social media as evidence (I don't have social media, obviously).
            Yeah, I'd want her as recreational use, but I'm not sure if I'm that kind of guy and it just seems like too much trouble (daughters, her expenses, etc).

            This question right here sums up the real problem going on - inequality of upbringing.

            The guys saying “it’s only a haircut and some social skills away bro” had a slightly better hand then they want to admit and even if it wasn’t financially , it could be as simple as having freedom as a youth. Many incels I suspect are ethnics under the thumb of their parents,

            And the guys who ask this question , are asking it with the full brunt of their existence on their shoulders. Having to take care of parents , bills they can never get ahead of , the autism inequality, ADHD, etc etc.

            And basically talking over each other

            >Many incels I suspect are ethnics under the thumb of their parents,
            Me.
            >And the guys who ask this question , are asking it with the full brunt of their existence on their shoulders. Having to take care of parents , bills they can never get ahead of , the autism inequality ADHD, etc etc.
            My situation isn't that bad, but it still doesn't seem worth it.

            >That doesn't really work, nowadays.
            Yes it does. I lost $0 in my divorce, because I had a prenup.

            Ok. But there's still a risk where I live, as I said above. This justice system isn't trustworthy.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            What country? And no. Do not get into any relationship with a single mother (beyond just fricking)
            Just don't do it

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Brazil.
            I don't think she has any interest in me, but I'll be brave, anyway.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Checked, and I can see why you're crushing on her... Brazilian women are usually 10/10. Just date a younger chick than her, my guy

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            depression+anxiety+everything here

            This question right here sums up the real problem going on - inequality of upbringing.

            The guys saying “it’s only a haircut and some social skills away bro” had a slightly better hand then they want to admit and even if it wasn’t financially , it could be as simple as having freedom as a youth. Many incels I suspect are ethnics under the thumb of their parents,

            And the guys who ask this question , are asking it with the full brunt of their existence on their shoulders. Having to take care of parents , bills they can never get ahead of , the autism inequality, ADHD, etc etc.

            And basically talking over each other

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            meant for

            Well frick, I hope everything is alright man. What's keeping you in bed?
            That anon probably hasn't figured out how to skew risk/reward into his favor yet, but there's still time. Open forums are much better for bouncing ideas or voicing concerns

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            I hope you get yourself to the doctor sometime soon. Also ask about trt (you'll have to get your levels checked) it'll help. Wagmi, my guy

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            im american so I don't have the money for something like that

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Get yourself to the social security office and registered for medicare/medicaid. Might as well get in on it before our country goes bankrupt

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >That doesn't really work, nowadays.
            Yes it does. I lost $0 in my divorce, because I had a prenup.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            im not trying anything to get women that's the problem. even leaving my bed is too much work these days

            why are you even in this thread then?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Well frick, I hope everything is alright man. What's keeping you in bed?
            That anon probably hasn't figured out how to skew risk/reward into his favor yet, but there's still time. Open forums are much better for bouncing ideas or voicing concerns

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Women do actually make it apparent when they're interested, I can see why thats more attractive than a cold approach (I've done both, but personally prefer a mutual attraction)

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          But its exhausting, like you have to do everything perfectly without margin of error.

          For example if you are too invested into making her interested in you, it seems like you are too deseprate (which is an instant turn off).

          If you go to slow they will act like you were never interested to begin with.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            True, it's def a balancing act... but you'll also be better off with being more bold, the only one putting you in the friend zone is you. Just be clear from the start about what you want, and if it's a no, then move on to the next. You'll be hard pressed to turn a friendship with a woman into a relationship... sure they may frick you every now and again, but you'll rarely be "good enough" to date if you've put yourself in the friend zone

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Attraction cannot be negotiated.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I do many things. Including talking to women.
      They just don't see me as a potential mate, but rather a friend.

      30 years old and only had 2 relationships that lasted 6 months each. fml

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Be bolder, my friend. Also women hate (love) competition, the most successful I've been with women, was when I was out with them/talking on the phone, and my phone was blowing up. That creates the sense of "oh shit, this guy must be desirable, or popular" and then your status is elevated in their eyes. Personally I find it embarrassing that I forget to silence the device prior to that signal, but thats just something I've noticed has a very positive effect.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Trips of truth.
          Its definitely correct that the more successful you are (or seem you are) then the more women want you.

          But then its like that situation of all jobs wanting people with experience, so it becomes virtually impossibel for someone to get their first job. You know what I mean?

          I'm not seeing any light at the end of this tunnel anon

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I know exactly what you mean. And that's what it feels like lol my dating apps bio said something like "anyone else feel like dating feels like a job interview these days?" It worked a bit
            But if you're not opposed to it, date a few chicks at the same time (some for practice, and some for real) at the very least, it's an exercise in time management, and multi-tasking, all while just being overly sociable. While fun, it's taxing to maintain.

            The cheat code? Whomever you're talking with, be the first one to disengage from the conversation, but politely in the beginning stages, unless you're hitting it off, over some shared interest.
            The other cheat code: use all the dating apps, and strike up conversation with random people in your daily life. The wider you cast your net, the more fish you'll catch

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      This. Most incels are at a weird crossroads of doing way too little while also caring way too much, truly the worst of all worlds.
      Chads and other guys who get women unironically tend to do the exact opposite, and it has nothing to do with height, cheekbones or any other weird cope on display in this thread.

      • 2 months ago
        Op

        I can respect their criteria for preference, they definitely want a good woman... but are, as you stated, at that weird crossroad. Well said. Very disheartening that they do not want to improve themselves to improve their situations

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I legitimately do not know where to meet women. I swear to God when I go outside I hardly see them.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        *you don't know where to meet women that's affordable and doesn't require an existing connection like a party or something

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Yes precisely. I have no friends and I work alone. How do I meet them out of the blue?

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Tinder, bumble, dating apps, gym, bars, social settings, there are plenty of places, anon.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >inb4 excuses
            I've tried dating apps over the years and fricking nothing.
            I stopped going to the gym because it's full of Black folk and browns.
            Bars are expensive as frick and there are no women there I've tried multiple times
            What social settings? I have no friends

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Not OP but there are well then anough settings. Any "celebratory" place is already enough like a concert, late night show, a country fair (dont know the exact term for it), religious festivities, grand openings of places, food festivals
            Having some friends to go there with certainly helps. Bumble has a friends function, and you can unironically gtry going up to people in clubs and find really good friends there. Remember, its just about having a group of friends, not specifically ones you really 100% vibe with (for the time at least, until you find better ones).
            If it was impossible, then there wouldnt be so many people who move into new places who build there social circle at a fast rate.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Well, if NSFFW has taught us anything: it's that hwhites are clearly superior to all darkies lol but seriously go to a different gym then? And maybe a axe throwing/ bowling league (off the top of my head) outdoor sports leagues are a thing too

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    All the good looking women who would make great wives and mothers are taken in high school and college the latest. Whatever remains is taken shortly after they enter the workforce. There exist very few good looking (6 and above) women that are single and have a good heart, are modest, raised in a decent family, soft spoken and pretty. The window of opportunity when they are single is very very narrow. These are the 1% of women, the highest stock of females this wonderful creation can offer. If you don't frequent their circles or the events they attend you have no chance of meeting them. Women also don't go anywhere alone, so whatever hobbies women have or events they attend it is done with their husband or boyfriend and if they are single with their groups of friends.
    Boomers and gen-x are throwing money at young pussy like never before, we are talking boat trips, exotic trips, paying their rent and bills, buying them clothes, trips to beauty salons, etc. Many of them have net worths in the millions. Just look at all those modelling agencies and realize how many pretty girls are being baited to frick the rich and upper class.
    Then there are chad millennials and chad zoomers who get their first pick at all the young pussy.
    Then at the end of the line there is you anon, the average nobody with no money, no charisma, no looks, no social circle, no experiences and no toys.

    tldr; there simply aren't enough single good looking young women to go around for everybody, they are rare and exist mostly in very niche places where men without social circles (loners) can't get in to

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      kys bot

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      The fallacy in that statement (while I agree with most of it) is that a woman with a good heart, cannot be bought. A lot of what you're pointing out, is more justification for the ones who need to hear it: to go outside and find hobbies that take you into these circles. Unironically, you can find those quality types of women at Church. Granted, one should not be going there, solely to get gash.. but to find a deeper faith (the rest comes after). Plenty of women marry within the church, and you'll likely find a quality woman there. If thats not your cup of tea, there are plenty of things you can get into, where people frequent... bowling leagues, axe throwing, co-Ed sports, libraries, you name it. Hell, even the gym is a good place to meet women. In my experience, the quality of the individual is not always tied to the circumstance which you've met them, it's a roll of the dice sometimes.
      >if you don't have a social circle, build one. We shape our realities.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I have read both books you've posted. I understand the nature of women. But here's the thing: I can't, and won't, change how I am as a man. I want the idealized version of a woman that I knew before I experienced and really learned about women. If all women are really hypergamous, histrionic, emotional rollercoasters, and a man must always do a song and dance to maintain an attraction in women over the course of a relationship, I don't want that. I REALLY don't fricking want that. And I really don't want to be one of those guys who wastes their time "spinning plates" for no other reason than to get laid with whatever loose, mindbroken women will have them.
    If its not easy being with a woman, just by being myself, I would rather be alone. And with this attitude, I'll most likely die alone.

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      I'm glad you figured out the entire purpose of those books listed. You as the man, makes the relationship, and are 100% the master of your universe. Might be worth taking the Christ pill, if you haven't already.. You'll find your ideal woman through Him. I did

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    OP, you answered many questions by this point, one still remains with me: Why do i feel embarrassed to show affection aka flirt with women out in the open (like in a bar)? Is it a natural reaction and you have to power through it, or is it actually a sign that what i am doing is wrong? I am very in tune with my body (as also evident by Enneagram type 9), and when trying to approach/flirt/seduce a woman i feel at odds with my body telling me it is not right. Kinda like when the other kids would tease you in schopl about liking a girl. Its childish i know but what do you think about this situation?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Fight or Flight response, along with fear of rejection and performance anxiety.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        All stemming from a lack of *confidence*, i presume?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I think confidence is only a small part of it in a lot of cases. It has more to do with not acting in a way that's "natural" to you. Someone can be an otherwise confident person but cold-approaching women in public can be "unnatural" to them. As for how to get over that, I'm not sure. I've only cold approached women when I'm drunk off my ass.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            All untrained habits are unnatural at first.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Like

            All untrained habits are unnatural at first.

            said
            Repetition is what's needed. Gotta train what you want to be proficient at. Or at least have a great poker face, when you're selling something you're unnatural at doing

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      My guess is that you're not being entirely authentic, and that you fear rejection. I'll be completely honest with you, I still kind of fear rejection every time I would ask a girl out, or make a move... eventually you learn to curb the outward response and redirect it into a casual dismissal of said rejection and then a change of topic. Roll with the punches lol and be unabashedly "you"

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I guess i am not comfortable with myself, which is why i was building myself out of my insecurities this past year (losing weight, being more stoic and less emotional/feminine, pushing through my career, getting my own flat...). Ironically, it only resulted in myself becoming numb to the world and to others, appearing as "unwell" , "arrogant", "standoffish" and "dead" to my family (friends didnt comment on it yet).

        Say, how can someone be himself if themselves are not someone admirable or valuable? Since adulthood i always wanted to be the best at everything in life, coming from my childhood where i always put my own needs aside to please others or give them leeway.
        It confuses me that people with lesser hygiene, lesser money, lesser looks and lesser social skills have partners (some of which have high value partners)

        In the words of Christ i read that everyone is valuable. How so, when even literal murderers, societal leeches and cheaters exist?

        • 2 months ago
          Op

          The first part, there's nothing wrong with self improvement. Did your family become upset with you when you started prioritizing yourself, so that you can foster the growth that was needed? That's rough, if it's the case man... but I think that's just a fear of a power dynamic shift, in which you're now autonomous. Keep in mind, that you're allowed to do both, at the same time or whenever you feel the need. However you have to look out for yourself too. You deserve that much.
          There isn't a timeline on when you're supposed to meet your match, that could happen in 20 minutes from now or 20 days.
          While we feel the ramifications of free will, it is not our place to cast judgement over someone's immortal soul. That's solely God's domain. Sure, some of the things that happen on this planet are extremely shitty, but we cannot have free will, without people acting like they have free will. "For all have sinned, and fall short of the Glory of God" good thing for us, is that Christ came for us to come to him for our salvation.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I think this will be my last reply, thank you OP and the others for your kind responses.
            Its more myself becoming "empty"; like feeling a strong sense of longing of nothing particular, which my body radiates outwards as "emptiness/numbness". Like playing a game in third person with myself as the character, just going through the trials and tribulations of each hour. My supportive family is the last anchor i certainly have on my sanity.
            I figure that this emptiness stems from feeling mike nothing i did to better my state really mattered in the long run, which is silly of course, but still. Since ive already had girlfriends and plenty successfull cold-approaches (mostly drunk, but still, one resulting in a relationship even) while i was in a far less good state mentally and especially physically, i feel empty knowing that what i did is pretty much pointless right now, which depresses me.
            On the other hand, reading about all your thoughts on how to approach the topic of being yourself gives me the thought that being yourself is intrinsically tied to being honesty; a virtue in nearly every culture. If we were to approach self-valueing, confidence and being oneselve in a rational matter, it would be a simple matter of being honest with your needs and free will.

            Saying and doing what you want, when you want.

            Second point brings up an argument though. You wouldnt want to disturb other peoples peace by offending, hurting or assaulting them. This is probably where the most discoussions of "Where do you meet women?" come from. You wouldnt want them be annoyed of your presence in their daily life, ir destroy a good atmosphere at a work place, or destroy a friend group, so what do?

            I think it boils down to dont think. Dont worry. Just do. Believe in the big picture. Be it god, the universe, manifestation, or a smoked bbq with fresh fries and buffalo sauce. Maybe thats why some men get so many women. They dont think.

            It was a good evening. Thank you all.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            My pleasure, anon.
            There's a wealth of knowledge out there, and the best way to share it, is simple interesting conversation.
            I think (at least for me it was so) that the sense of longing comes from not having a purpose/belonging to something greater than the self. Once it's found, it grounds us, and ties us to the present.
            It is pretty cool, and quite interesting to see that some universal constants exist in all walks of life, as the pinnacle of persona. Dare I say it: we're not all that different lol
            Have a good one, anon. Feel free to email sometime if you like (open to all, it's an alternate account)

            [email protected]

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Man, this shit is not helpful, in fact it's almost triggering to me, because it's telling me I can't be myself, I instead have to be the kind of guy who wins in a bar.

    Mark Manson's Models is much better than this, because it's also about you being the prize, but not having this mindset of proving anything, it's about learning to act on your desires and not caring so much about what other people think, which when internalized, paradoxically makes you more attractive, but that shouldn't matter to you, that would be being invested in others' perceptions, which is neediness, which is offputting.

    In short, don't shill those, shill Mark Manson.

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      No Idea who that dude is. I'll ask you this: why do you feel that "the person who wins at the bar" is not someone you are, and why do you think you're not supposed to be yourself? Those are not mutually exclusive, anon. And if you aren't that guy, what's stopping you from growing/honing yourself into that vision you hold in your mind, of that guy? Here's a secret brother, that vision you have, is actually your vision of you. Pull it to the forefront, self improvement is the way to solidify it.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        You should check Mark Manson out, he basically obsoleted Strauss and PUA.

        As to your question, well, I'm basically an introverted intellectual, and I feel like that's not something that can win in a bar, yet I'm pretty sure introverted intellectuals find love too. I still tried talking to a girl in a bar the other day, and maybe I'll do more of that to get in the habit of rolling the dice more, but you know, it's like Mark Manson said somewhere: "if you're an intellectual who loves abstraction, you probably won't have a great time trying to talk to party animals in a bar who haven't cracked open a book since high school". You're better off finding your scene, in short, instead of trying to become some kind of generic cool guy.

        Also, I just want to kill the part of me that thinks I'm not enough, and when a standard that I'm not is held up as THE goal, it gets in the way of that. Being a square peg trying to fit into a round hole has been a great source of misery throughout my life.

        • 2 months ago
          Op

          I'll give him a read, sounds pretty interesting. There's a niche for everyone, and I definitely agree that you can't really force yourself to enjoy something that's tedious.
          Don't kill it, grow it. In our own eyes, we may never be what we want to be... but thsts the drive to grow

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Great, I think any guy would get a lot out of it. I got a guy on twitter to pick it up yesterday, he got halfway through in like 6 hours, it resonated that much.

            Pic related.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Oops, pic

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            That good? Gonna buy it rn. As you can see, I have plenty of time at work most days, to make and keep up with posts on the chan

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I don’t think a long term relationship is for me. I have a feeling that I won’t live long enough for it to be worth it

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      Why do you think that?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I see death on its way

        • 2 months ago
          Op

          In what capacity? Death comes for us all, eventually. Make him work for it

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    How can I ?
    I am 22, virgin
    22 already balding, my dick is only 5.7 inches length and 4.7 inches girth, my hands are ugly... these things are mentally debilitating to me and are holding me back because they are true.
    In my mind I only imagine woman will always reject me
    It's not that I am scared of rejection
    I am scared of the woman being disgusted by me
    This are things I cannot change
    How can I have a chance with women ?
    How ?
    Please advise me anons

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      Well brother, just accept that you're balding, and shave it off if it truly bothers you. You're literally the global average as far as penis size goes... what's wrong with that? The female g spot is not that far in there. Just get good at eating out... call it foreplay, and watch it work for you. I can promise you, that it's (and I'm saying this from a place of love) only you who's stopping you from just getting out there and talking to women.

    • 2 months ago
      Seanonymous

      i wouldn't care if i had a small dick cause she probably wouldn't leave me if i got that far anyway unless it was literally a micropenis or something

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'm 5'5 dude, no matter what I'm always at best going to be a women's backup plan, the ones she bitterly settles for because she's run out of options, the life jacket, monkey branch, etc.
    Never the guy she goes "wow, that's someone I want to be with."
    That's a horrible place to end up even if I get laid for a couple month before she ask for marriage followed by a dead bedroom until she divorces my ass.
    I'll stick to my escorts, money and hobbies thank you very much.

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      If you're successful enough to create what you want out of life, why are you holding yourself back, and thinking that your height matters that much? Really curious when the last time you've actually tried to date someone was, and what type of person that was. The real world is not like NSFFW.
      >your height is not a personality trait, nor is it your sole identifier.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Why are guys like you incapable of understanding objective truths about the human condition? Is it because you've never truly experienced it?
        There comes a point in the life of most men when they have to look at themselves objectively in the mirror and face the music. Hell even guys at the top sometimes have to face the reality that some situation are just fricked and out of their control.
        You can still find happiness, which I have, but the delusion of griffers like you telling some disfigured short guys that they just have to heckin be yourself and grind brah is patronizing.
        They are certain realities that you can't overcome, and it's alright to admit that you fricking hippie.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Nta but to me it seems you're the one who's gone to the other end of the horseshoe and has doomed himself into a corner

          Yes, for example, women like tall guys. Being tall will definitely help if you're looking for sex or a partner. But look around you, there are short guys who are successful, fulfilled, and have wives/girlfriends. It's not fair that they have to compensate for their shortness with other traits, but then life isn't fair. You work with what you've got.

          There's even genetic proof of this. If women just full stop didn't frick or partner off with short guys, don't you think there would be less short guys in the world?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Hey moron, what do you think happens when a 6ft guy fricks a 5'2 girl?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            hot sex?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Okay, wallow in your doom, then. Btw height is 80% heritability from the father, not that I'd expect gutter trash like yourself to have ever run into that during your education

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Checked, but I'll ask you to do this simple excercise. Next time you talk with a woman, ash her to point out everyone who is 6 feet tall. I can guarentee you that not a single woman will get it correct. They really don't know, and it's solely a social media criteria that they just ask for without really knowing

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Point was that I don't want to be settled for.
            You said it yourself; I can be successful and fulfilled, which I now am at 32. I was completely ignored in my early 20s in sometimes very cruel ways, yet now that I've got a great job and a 750k euro waterfront property suddenly women have changed their mind, which is insulting especially since it lines up exactly with their looks fading and the needs for comfort that comes with old ages.
            I have casual sex, spoil girls, have a fun time, but the idea of a committed relationship is a no no because I know that they're not there for me.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I have terrible news: relationships are ALWAYS "settling for." This isn't a Disney movie, love isn't pure, people have practical motivations when seeking partnership with other people. That doesn't mean every person is a caricature of a mustache twirling villain, people just have needs and desires. At some point, you've surely had needs or desires that excluded a sizeable population of women for traits they have no control over. Even in your reply you smugly dismissed women who age. Are you just going to find a new partner every time the last hits your arbitrary age wall? Grow up.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            he's making a point that women didn't select him based on his looks ( the only real love women can give) and now after they've been ran through they're trying to get him to provide. he's correct to not commit

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            From the way he complains, they were right to snub him before he had money. Short and fragile is no way to go through life

            It's what I've been doing for the past 2 years and I've been having a blast.
            Women are not entitled to me the same way I'm not entitled to them. If I want to have consensual casual flings with cute women in exchange for buying her a nice sundress and dinner date, then be on my way I'm perfectly allowed to.
            I've also had these situationships with some older women to, but no, I won't commit and risk losing half my shit or a dead bedroom.
            This isn't the 1950's anymore grandpa, male gender role are out.

            The irony of saying these things only after you've grasped power in the dating market is hilarious. You are the caricature of vapid, shallow women you paint who never saw value in you. Pro tip, you thought it was because you're short, but with every reply it becomes more clear you're just a person who lacks any substance. You're gutter trash and you'll never rise above it.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I'm not mean to girls, nor do I treat them like trash. I don't sell them a false fantasy, but I'm not delusional enough to believe that they love me. As a matter of fact you'd be surprise at how much better it is and how much tension evaporates on both side once the transactional aspects as been taken care of.
            I'm ugly and short dude, I know it, the girls know it, and we both know that we can still enjoy each others in some way without subterfuges and lies or resorting to mean insults like you're doing.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            It's what I've been doing for the past 2 years and I've been having a blast.
            Women are not entitled to me the same way I'm not entitled to them. If I want to have consensual casual flings with cute women in exchange for buying her a nice sundress and dinner date, then be on my way I'm perfectly allowed to.
            I've also had these situationships with some older women to, but no, I won't commit and risk losing half my shit or a dead bedroom.
            This isn't the 1950's anymore grandpa, male gender role are out.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >Are you just going to find a new partner every time the last hits your arbitrary age wall?
            Works for Leo Dicaprio lol
            That's the new Meta for men. Maximize looks, status and resources, and then have no repercussion fun.
            You said it yourself that relationships are ALWAYS settling for, so why settle?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            This is the way if all you want from life is an endless stream of bangmaids who don't care about you and only care about what you do for them.

            When I said life isn't a Disney movie, I didn't mean every single move in a relationship is transactional, just that people have practical motivations for entering relationships. There are still opportunities for genuine connection in there, but you have to have things worth offering first. You people think money, status, and muscles are the only way through to women, and are surprised when you attract gold diggers, clout chasers, and divas.

            When someone tells you to have a good, stable career, you hear "become the Wolf of Wall Street." When they say become respected among your peers, you hear "you have to become the Top G." When they say you need to hit the gym to be fit and healthy, you hear "become the next Jack Atlas." These hollow races to the bottom will not fulfill you or attract people who are interested in you. But you don't want to do the hard work of becoming a person with things to offer including a personality you cultivated, these things are just shortcuts to sex.

            You're all so shortsighted and will regret it in divorce court after you're baby trapped one day

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Charles Atlas* don't know why I thought his name was Jack

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I got a vasectomy to fix that problem, and froze some goo in case I change my mind.
            I can have all of that without committing to a women, I've had a couple girls stick around for months, and one that I still keep contact with and who comes to stay over every once in a while. I also have you know, regular friends and family. It's a fulfilling life all things considered.

            I think it's inevitable that the current monogamous marriage system fails, it cannot be sustained without both male and female gender roles. If women can frick chad they will, and if dudes like me(chad or not) can frick 20 girls with no commitment a year, they will, and if dudes who can't compete or buy their way in don't get any they'll simply stop being good citizens.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >muh monogamy is failing
            Divorce rates are at a 50 year all-time-low. Your assessment of the world does not map onto reality. You are deranged and mislead by redpill types who want you to be miserable.

            >waaah people will frick as many people as they want as much as they want
            Yeah no shit, people like sex. Unless it's cheating happening in a committed relationship, there's no issue with people having lots of sex.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >Divorce rates are at a 50 year all-time-low
            True, but marriage rate are also at an all time low.A 60% decrease since 1920 and rapidly increasing.

            No one is evil for what's happening, no one is doing something 'bad' per say apart from cheaters.
            It's ok to have casual sex, it's ok for chad to frick 30 girls, it's ok for me to buy a girl a purse and she sucks my dick in exchange, it's ok for women to pick and choose who they want to have sex with and for what.
            That being said the delusion that this free for all, no rules system as no repercussion to the collective is foolish. Even I can admit that my behavior is not good for society.
            If women are only having sex with a small minority of rich/attractive guys, and those guys don't create committed relationship that result in families since they have a lot of option and have no reason to risk investing in a girl properly, it creates problems.
            It creates sad women who don't get commitment, it creates traumatized women who get hurt, it creates broken homes, it creates incels who lash out, it creates guys who have no reason to invest in their communities.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Different anon but society won't collapse from population decrease only the wealthy class will and social programs.

          • 2 months ago
            Op

            Congrats on your success anon, now you get to choose who gets what out of you. Personally I noticed the same thing, the older I've gotten (30 years old now) and more I've got my shit together, it's basically like shooting fish in a barrel. While it's true that women can be ruthless to guys in their younger years (personally I found it as amusing as ever when they did so to me) we always win in the end. Now that you have your pick of the litter, I do hope that you feel fulfilled in such.

        • 2 months ago
          Op

          I, like many other men have, dated women who were taller than me. According to NSFFW/blackpill: this should be impossible, right? It's not. Your height does not matter that much... the ones that say it's their sole attractor are the most shallow, and pretentious ones you can meet. How you carry yourself speaks more towards how you're perceived, than solely being a bean pole. This is irrefutable fact. To say "well it's because I'm too short" is pure cope to your inability to be more than you are intrinsically.
          Don't be a goober, introspection and personal growth aren't hippie activities. And yes, shit does happen.. I'm just a dude who's giving advice on the internet
          >why don't you want to be yourself? That's the only person you can be

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >you are the prize
    >now go and prove it
    this sums up the pua mentality perfectly. all this pua shit is just men submitting to what they perceive to be an unfair competition then deluding themselves into believing they can still win with the right strategy. the problem is of course it's not a competition for any woman worth having a relationship with. if a woman perceives dating as a competition she's certainly a flake and not worth your time. putting in effort to change how others perceive you will only trap you in a relationship where you have to keep up appearances or get dumped. it's a lose-lose game when you treat dating like a competitive business. the problem with modern dating is that so many people, men and women, are not attractive partners overall. the dating pool of decent people is seriously limited and everyone believes they deserve somebody from that pool. it's a simple logistical impossibility that everyone can be successful, or even that most people can be successful. both men and women are equally to blame for offering a net negative while demanding a net positive from others. when men ask women what they have to offer they will list a dozen things men don't give a shit about. when women ask men what they have to offer men will list a dozen things women don't give a shit about. everyone seems to think they can dictate what others prioritize in a partner and the result is a bunch of entitled morons screaming false accusations of misogyny and misandry at each other.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I hear what you're saying man but the real world outside is more forgiving.

    • 2 months ago
      Op

      I hear what you're saying man but the real world outside is more forgiving.

      Is right. It's very forgiving out there in the real world. You have a good point, in that dating is competitive. Thsts simply what life, and survival is.. why would you think that courtship is any different?
      It's not "keep up appearances", it's simply just "become what you want to be"
      >that has for more power to create your life, than just pretending.
      Everyone can spot a fake, so when you're the real deal: people start to look at you positively.

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    How do you make connections with people?
    Especially in an environment where you were excluded out of the "golden" opportunity to have any kind of contact with others?
    Even when I had the chance to talk to somebody, you could just tell they didn't want me anywhere near them.

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    No dating process for my face

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