Why am I the only man who cannot attract women?

My whole life I have seen every different kind of guy get girls. Short guys, ugly guys, fat guys, balding guys, guys with fricked up teeth, guys with no style, guys who wear dirty clothes, autistic guys, guys with zero personality, depressive/suicidal guys. Literally everyone.

I was the only person I knew, out of probably upwards of 100+ friends/acquaintances, who graduated university as a kissless dateless virgin. Literally every other person, both male and female, had either dated or had sex with a few people at some point during those 4 years. But not me.

I don't understand what I ever did to deserve this. I'm a normal guy. I'm 5'11. I dress well. I smell nice. I'm better looking than most other guys I know. I'm in good shape. I have aspergers syndrome, but that alone shouldn't be enough to completely frick my chances, because every other aspie/autistic guy I knew managed to get GFs with no problem.

Is it possible that I am just cursed by some kind of malevolent god to be romantically/sexually invisible to women for my entire life? It feels like I'm just ignored by women no matter what I do. I've had girls pretty much reject me just to get with some 5'5 midget a few minutes later. None of it makes any sense.

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Same, honestly idk what's wrong with us. I keep trying but the only thing that I attract are fatties...

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      No, you aren't "the same" as me. Nobody else is like me. I am the world's one and only true kissless dateless virgin. You're just an incel who hates women. We are NOTHING alike.

      If it's not them then that means it's (You)

      I know that. But what specifically is it about me? Why is it only me who fails at this?

      People will say its a insecurity issue, but I've known guys who had cripplingly severe autism or were openly suicidal, and even they managed to get GFs. What is so bad about me that I'm somehow worse than them?

      Hey anon, remember in middle school when you would have races in PE class? Who was first? Was it you? Or did all the kids get 1st place? Now take that concept and apply it to your current life.

      A better analogy is that everybody else gets to run in the race, while I get disqualified before it even begins, for literally no reason.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Oh boy here we go with this "woe is me" shit. I'm not even a woman and I'm tired of you already. Blah blah doom and gloom, blah blah muh kiss less virgin, all horseshit that I read and that you idiots believe time and time again. Go swallow a barrel man cause as you are, you aren't getting anywhere.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Oh boy here we go with this "woe is me" shit.
          Anybody would be disappointed if they'd had the experiences I've had with women.

          It's not even that I've been mistreated by women. And I don't hate women either. But it's like they just see straight through me. Going through your whole life never once being considered as a romantic option by any girl is bewildering.

          If I was ugly or short or something, then at least I could understand why. But I'm neither of those things. I am literally just a normal, decent guy. So it's incredibly frustrating that, despite not doing anything wrong, I still can't even get one date or one kiss.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You keep saying 'women' in this extremely generic sense. We're multiple replies in, and you haven't even hinted at any specific situation or specific woman. Are they all filling the same interchangeable woman-role in your head, so the variations or specifics aren't relevant? Women can tell when you don't actually mentally view them as people. Have you ever completely voluntarily spoken with a woman without thinking about how you want her to be your gf?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >We're multiple replies in, and you haven't even hinted at any specific situation or specific woman.
            Oh, I can give you plenty of examples of my specific experiences with specific women if you want. But there are too many, and it would take up too much of the thread to explain them.

            >Are they all filling the same interchangeable woman-role in your head, so the variations or specifics aren't relevant?
            Nope.

            >Have you ever completely voluntarily spoken with a woman without thinking about how you want her to be your gf?
            Have you actually read any of my posts? I already stated multiple times that I had plenty of female friends and I never wanted them to be my GFs, I was happy just being friends.

            >act completely differently around women
            >behave as if mistakes are absolutely necessary to avoid (signals that you either consider them intimidating for some reason, or that you consider them like someone mentally disabled), speak in a forced manner
            >ensure you send zero signals of romantic interest...aka signalling that you are NOT ROMANTICALLY INTERESTED
            >>why are women off-put by me???

            not trying to be harsh to you, trying to help you see how your strategy to avoid failure is actually doing the exact opposite. you are in fact purposefully signaling "DO NOT TRY TO DATE ME" to women, somehow without realizing this is what youre doing

            >you are in fact purposefully signaling "DO NOT TRY TO DATE ME" to women, somehow without realizing this is what youre doing
            No, I get it, and I'm kind of aware that I've done that. I have often tried to signal romantic disinterest in women because I thought this made me look cooler and more aloof. I thought girls would like me more if I had this stoic, hard exterior. But I guess that didn't work for me.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I have often tried to signal romantic disinterest in women because I thought this made me look cooler and more aloof
            Lol, it doesn't. If anything it's tryhard virgin energy.
            > I thought girls would like me more if I had this stoic, hard exterior.
            They like that, IF you can blend it with being fun to talk to, and not asexual. The other problem here is that this "hard stoic man" bit is obviously not you, they can sniff out a fake. Hate to just boil it down to "be yourself bro" but really, that's what it is.
            > But I guess that didn't work for me.
            The way you've described it, it's not only clumsily executed but fake. It wouldn't work for anyone.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Lol, it doesn't. If anything it's tryhard virgin energy.
            But surely I would come across as MORE virgin-like if I was acting like some horndog, constantly begging for women's attention and complimenting them? I don't want to be like that.

            >Hate to just boil it down to "be yourself bro" but really, that's what it is.
            I'm an autistic man, I can't just "be myself", because "myself" is nerdy and awkward as frick and will make women actively repulsed from me.

            >So never any expressed interest in her, specifically? Any questions you could ask her about herself, or compliments you could give?
            I ask questions about her, but I do not give compliments no.
            I mean what do you even want me to compliment her on? If I say "I like your shirt" or something, I'll just come across as pathetic and desperate. If I come right out and say "you look nice today" I'll seem like a perv or a rapist.

            >We've danced this dance many times anon.
            I've been posting threads like these since 2017 so if you've really talked to me in the past then I'm afraid whatever advice you had for me never worked.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >if I was acting like some horndog, constantly begging for women's attention and complimenting them?
            And who told you to do that either? Why is everything some ridiculous either/or extreme with you?
            >"myself" is nerdy and awkward as frick and will make women actively repulsed from me.
            Than either work on yourself to be less awkward and more open and fun, or at least just own being a nerdy autist. But the hard man routine is not being yourself either.
            >If I say "I like your shirt" or something, I'll just come across as pathetic and desperate. If I come right out and say "you look nice today" I'll seem like a perv or a rapist.
            What the frick?!
            Like seriously anon, where do you get this stuff? Enough with the cope.
            >whatever advice you had for me never worked.
            You never took any, you're still not taking any.

            Lmao yeah that's definitely me.

            But I have to do it to protect myself from embarrassment. If I start flirting with girls and they don't reciprocate, they're just going to pity me like I'm some small pathetic child who wants something he cannot have.

            One side of the line spacing here is truth, one is pure cope and delusion.
            I'll let you figure out which is which.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Than either work on yourself to be less awkward and more open and fun, or at least just own being a nerdy autist.
            As much as I wish I could, you cannot cure autism, so it will have to be the latter, but that doesn't really work either. Aspergers is female repellent.

            >>If I say "I like your shirt" or something, I'll just come across as pathetic and desperate. If I come right out and say "you look nice today" I'll seem like a perv or a rapist.
            >What the frick?!
            >Like seriously anon, where do you get this stuff?
            ???
            If I compliment a girl on her appearance, then I'm clearly expressing sexual interest in her. If I'm expressing sexual interest in a girl, then there's a strong chance she could think I'm a creep who is only talking to her to get inside her pants, and women HATE that.

            Ideally I always thought if I ever got a date/a girlfriend, it would just happen naturally. That's what all my friends said about how they got their GFs. It "just happens". They're at a party, they meet a girl, and it "just happens". They're in their class, a girl is next to them, and "things just happen". They make it sound like it's some mystical, magical force of attraction that pulls them together effortlessly. So why doesn't that happen to me?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >If I compliment a girl on her appearance, then I'm clearly expressing sexual interest in her. If I'm expressing sexual interest in a girl, then there's a strong chance she could think I'm a creep who is only talking to her to get inside her pants, and women HATE that.
            You're forgetting a few very important things here. Namely, that you don't know anything about women or how they think (pic very related), and you've never actually done any of these things.
            >That's what all my friends said about how they got their GFs. It "just happens". They're at a party, they meet a girl, and it "just happens". They're in their class, a girl is next to them, and "things just happen". They make it sound like it's some mystical, magical force of attraction that pulls them together effortlessly. So why doesn't that happen to me?
            It "just happens" from their perspective, because they're talking, bonding, flirting, etc. You COULD do the same things, but, if we take your autism claims at face value (and sorry, I never take any anon's claims at face value on this board) you might just have to try a little bit harder, because you're not used to it.
            That doesn't make it impossible, just harder.

            Now, you know the real reason I don't buy your autism claims?
            Because if you really were, there wouldn't be any big mystery why you're not connecting with or "attracting" women. That would be your answer, loud and clear. So the fact you're still asking us why leads me to believe that you don't truly believe in your autism claim yourself.
            In any case, I've seen guys with autism irl who still had a gf, so even if you're right it's not an excuse. Or, to be nicer sounding about it if you prefer, it means there's still hope.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Namely, that you don't know anything about women or how they think (pic very related), and you've never actually done any of these things.
            I've seen plenty of women on the internet talk about how they don't want to be flirted with by men without asking for it first. Or telling stories about "that one guy" who made a move on her when she wasn't interested.

            >but, if we take your autism claims at face value (and sorry, I never take any anon's claims at face value on this board)
            >Now, you know the real reason I don't buy your autism claims?
            >Because if you really were, there wouldn't be any big mystery why you're not connecting with or "attracting" women.
            I was diagnosed in 2009 at age 13. Whether you believe that or not, it's true. But I was always told, by those who diagnosed me and by counsellors I had afterwards, that I am an "extremely high functioning" aspie.

            >In any case, I've seen guys with autism irl who still had a gf,
            Yes, so have I, and I mentioned that in my OP. Which just makes it all the more depressing and confusing that I am the one and only guy who struggles this badly with women.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I have answers for everything here but I have to leave for work. Check back later OP.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            OP, do you have any hobbies or interests? If so, do you attend events related to them? Speaking from experience, your best chance by far is to meet a woman who's also on the spectrum and interested in some of the same things you are.
            You may not have social skills, but if you can keep up a conversation about her special interest, that's all an autistic woman needs to want to spend time with you. And she'll actually understand if you have to literally say something like "look, I'm not sure how to say this in a way that isn't awkward, but I think you're very cute and was wondering if you'd want to go on a date sometime?" Rather than trying to play the silly little games that neurotypicals play that involve reading subtle signals of attraction and reacting to them in the right way.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I have answers for everything here but I have to leave for work. Check back later OP.

            Ok, I'm back.
            >I've seen plenty of women on the internet
            >on the internet
            There's mistake number one. Look, I know the internet is probably your entire frame of reference, but you need to touch grass and observe how things work in the real world. You don't even have to get involved, just watch people. Sometimes women want to be flirted with, sometimes they don't. It depends on the time and place, and it depends on the guy.
            >Yes, so have I, and I mentioned that in my OP. Which just makes it all the more depressing and confusing that I am the one and only guy who struggles this badly with women.

            Here's my thoughts: you may well be legitimately autistic (albeit high functioning), but that's not really the problem here.
            The problem here is not autism but neuroticism. These other autistic guys, who you and I have both seen, still aren't afraid to shoot their shot. They're not afraid to flirt. From what I've seen and inferred from your posts, you are both deathly afraid of rejection (or even just looking stupid) and you are not comfortable in your own skin or with your own sexuality. You get mad that women do not see you as a sexual being, but you do not present yourself as one. These other autists we know might not be the smoothest operators, but they're still more at ease when talking to women and making their intentions known than you are. Your inhibitions are what are truly holding you back here.
            Until you work on that, nothing will change. Even if you were to meet some autistic girl who is into the same whatever weird nerdy shit you are, it wouldn't matter if you couldn't express your interests and desires to her. Even autistic women still want to feel like women and want their prospective man to actually want them.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Not OP but
            >"Hate to just boil it down to "be yourself bro" but really, that's what it is."
            >"I'm an autistic man, I can't just "be myself", because "myself" is nerdy and awkward as frick and will make women actively repulsed from me"
            >"Than either work on yourself to be less awkward and more open and fun, or at least just own being a nerdy autist. But the hard man routine is not being yourself either."

            "Be yourself bro, but change yourself! It's just that simple dude!" There should be a law passed where people like you are dragged out and whipped for your "advice".

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >There should be a law passed where people like you are dragged out and whipped for your "advice".
            Ooh, got a tough guy here I see.
            If you had it in you to do that, you would also have it in you to escalate with women and wouldn't be here needing my advice.
            >b-but I said I'm not OP
            Doesn't matter, you empathize with him so clearly cut from the same cloth.

            Also, "be yourself" never, ever meant you couldn't change, or weren't supposed to change. Let alone that you were supposed to double-down on all your worst traits. It just meant you're not supposed to be fake.
            And if you actually read OP's posts, he made it clear that he is NOT being himself. He wants women, he wants them to view him as a sexual being and he wants to be able to have relations with them. But his own actions betray him. He refuses to flirt or escalate because he thinks its inappropriate or that he'll "tip them off" somehow that he's interested in them (uh...no shit?). That's why goes through the elaborate ruse of pretending he's not interested when this is actually what he wants more than anything in the world.
            I am always "myself" when I'm talking to people, women included. OP is not, OP is deeply inhibited and repressed. So yes, homosexual, "being yourself" would do OP (and likely, you) a world of good.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I have often tried to signal romantic disinterest in women because I thought this made me look cooler and more aloof.
            Had to dig around my meme folder for this old classic, you're a perfect example OP.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Lmao yeah that's definitely me.

            But I have to do it to protect myself from embarrassment. If I start flirting with girls and they don't reciprocate, they're just going to pity me like I'm some small pathetic child who wants something he cannot have.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Woman poster spotted
            Why would a man ever speak to a woman unless he was looking for a gf/quick frick? It's one or the other. Sorry femcel but there is no guy who will just meet you and immediately be deeply invested in learning about your thoughts and feelings.

            The social interest in any relationship comes after sexual attraction never before (except maybe with women).

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        > for literally no reason
        You're obviously doing something wrong, and whining about it on the internet doesn't really help your situation

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      men pursue, they don't attract.
      You're not a man.

      Fatties can be made thin.

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If it's not them then that means it's (You)

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Hey anon, remember in middle school when you would have races in PE class? Who was first? Was it you? Or did all the kids get 1st place? Now take that concept and apply it to your current life.

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It doesn't matter how attractive someone is or isn't, I've seen them find love
    The most manipulative and rude people I've known, buttholes, I've seen find love
    I've seen people lacking in charisma find it too, typically with other awkward nerdy people- usually meeting at conventions or back in high school

    I don't think there's a single answer for all us KHVs why we can't find someone, it's all relative
    as some stranger I don't personally know it's impossible for me to say what you're problem is if there is one

    you might come off as rude IRL and not know it, maybe you come off too strong or not at all- I don't know man
    you've heard it before, women knows when a guy is desperate regardless if they vocalize it
    let it go, don't let the thought of being alone be in your thoughts too often

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >It doesn't matter how attractive someone is or isn't, I've seen them find love
      >The most manipulative and rude people I've known, buttholes, I've seen find love
      >I've seen people lacking in charisma find it too, typically with other awkward nerdy people- usually meeting at conventions or back in high school
      Exactly. Very few people on this website understand this.
      One of the main reasons I have always refused to use the term "incel" for myself is because incels believe it's all about looks and height. Whereas I KNOW that that's not true.

      >you might come off as rude IRL and not know it, maybe you come off too strong or not at all- I don't know man
      I definitely don't come off too strong, because I don't really flirt with women at all. I don't know how to flirt. And I don't want to be seen as "creepy" or "perverted" so I simply refrain from ever doing or talking about anything that could be construed as sexual around women.

      I have been told by some girls in the past that they thought I "hated them", but I don't know how this is possible because I always go out of my way to be kind and sociable towards people. One time back when I was 18, I apparently made a girl run off crying into the toilets because she thought I was "talking down to her" or something. The girl was the GF of a friend of mine and he blew up at me and cut contact with me after that, calling me "arrogant". It wasn't even my fault, I didn't do it intentionally, in fact I didn't even realize I had done anything wrong at all until I was told. I think women just dislike me and view me as suspicious for no reason.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        > definitely don't come off too strong, because I don't really flirt with women at all
        You can come off as strong even through casual conversation with intent to make friends
        it's weird

        >I have been told by some girls in the past that they thought I "hated them"
        I've been told that a lot through various people, I just didn't say much and when I did it was direct
        I've hurt a lot of feelings and didn't realize why unless someone explained to me why I should say it or until months later- like it clicked and I realized that asking if someone's mother was dead is not a question someone should ask

        I'm autistic but have been learning to socialize over the years, sucks cause everyone had a headstart years ago and I started learning things a 5 year old knew at 20
        but I have friends now, never thought it would ever happen
        I still say weird things sometimes but catch myself on it, apologize and they understand

        reading that last bit you wrote though, definitely sounds like aspergers affects things for you
        my father has aspergers too and says very abrasive things
        he doesn't understand how he comes off as rude
        even when we explain why, his choice of words or inflection (sometimes he genuinely says rude things like "yeah that guy looks old and fat for 40) and still doesn't understand what was wrong with what he said

        your inflection matters in conversation, choice of words, the slight way you look at someone
        again I don't know exactly what you're struggling with but I'm guessing word choice or inflection? not sure if inflection's even the right term

        how do you fix that, maybe just hanging out with friends more
        ask them to call you out on something, explain what was wrong
        that might be awkward though

        I'm not much help, but I resonate with the social struggle and wanted to try
        good luck anon

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >One of the main reasons I have always refused to use the term "incel" for myself is because incels believe it's all about looks and height. Whereas I KNOW that that's not true.
        I would agree with you here OP, this is correct.
        >because I don't really flirt with women at all. I don't know how to flirt.
        >I simply refrain from ever doing or talking about anything that could be construed as sexual around women.
        And there it is. Mystery solved OP.
        As for the rest of your post, remember girls are used to guys flirting with them or hitting on them so if you never do, that's exactly what they misconstrue as you "hating" or talking down to them. I was the same way when I was much younger.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >act completely differently around women
        >behave as if mistakes are absolutely necessary to avoid (signals that you either consider them intimidating for some reason, or that you consider them like someone mentally disabled), speak in a forced manner
        >ensure you send zero signals of romantic interest...aka signalling that you are NOT ROMANTICALLY INTERESTED
        >>why are women off-put by me???

        not trying to be harsh to you, trying to help you see how your strategy to avoid failure is actually doing the exact opposite. you are in fact purposefully signaling "DO NOT TRY TO DATE ME" to women, somehow without realizing this is what youre doing

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Do you avoid all booze and intoxicants?
      If yes, then that is your issue.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        No, I never thought I'd be at this point but now I'm an alcoholic
        Going outside is like someone screaming while shoving a flashlight in my face, but when I drink I feel almost normal
        I don't want to rely on booze to feel this way but for now it's what does

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    okay how many girls did you talk to? Fricking moron

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You just didn't try speaking enough while in university
      and now that you're out, there's no possible way to ever get to speak to one

      you need to focus on saving up to quit your job, come back to university and meeting women while there, by actually speaking to them and getting to know one another this time

      there's no option for him to speak to girls now you fricking moron he said hes not in uni anymore

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Oh I didn't know women only congrate around unis or only talk to guys who are enrolled. Seriously moron, touch some grass.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          you go touch grass you autistic moron
          outside of uni they only ever speak to people through people they know. you are a serious fricking moron who's never been outside to not know it.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Satan begone!
          He is a local celebrity

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >okay how many girls did you talk to?
      Literally hundreds. I was very sociable in my high school and university years. And I had female friends, but none of them were ever romantically interested in me. It's like I was auto-friendzoned by every girl I ever met.

      You just didn't try speaking enough while in university
      and now that you're out, there's no possible way to ever get to speak to one

      you need to focus on saving up to quit your job, come back to university and meeting women while there, by actually speaking to them and getting to know one another this time

      there's no option for him to speak to girls now you fricking moron he said hes not in uni anymore

      >You just didn't try speaking enough while in university
      See above. I spoke to everybody I possibly could at uni. Had a large social circle. Participated in various clubs and hobbies. Went to bars, clubs and parties whenever possible. I was more socially active than most of the guys who DID get women.

      >Short guys, ugly guys, fat guys, balding guys, guys with fricked up teeth, guys with no style, guys who wear dirty clothes, autistic guys, guys with zero personality, depressive/suicidal guys. Literally everyone.
      All those guys talked to a woman at some point. Did you?

      Yes. See above.

      >One of the main reasons I have always refused to use the term "incel" for myself is because incels believe it's all about looks and height. Whereas I KNOW that that's not true.
      I would agree with you here OP, this is correct.
      >because I don't really flirt with women at all. I don't know how to flirt.
      >I simply refrain from ever doing or talking about anything that could be construed as sexual around women.
      And there it is. Mystery solved OP.
      As for the rest of your post, remember girls are used to guys flirting with them or hitting on them so if you never do, that's exactly what they misconstrue as you "hating" or talking down to them. I was the same way when I was much younger.

      >And there it is. Mystery solved OP.
      >As for the rest of your post, remember girls are used to guys flirting with them or hitting on them so if you never do, that's exactly what they misconstrue as you "hating" or talking down to them.
      Girls never gave me any invitations to flirt with them.

      Most people would say that women are supposed to give you signs of interest if they want you. Things like staring at you a lot, twirling their hair, touching your arms, or angling their legs towards you while sitting down. Well, no woman has EVER done these things towards me. They just act completely platonically towards me like they don't even acknowledge me as a man.

      What exactly am I supposed to do when this is the case? I literally never had any opportunities to flirt with girls because they just were never open to it.

      > for literally no reason
      You're obviously doing something wrong, and whining about it on the internet doesn't really help your situation

      Well tell me WHAT I'm doing wrong. Because from my perspective, I basically did everything right and still failed. Meanwhile, guys who never tried at all just had GFs and dates fall into their lap without doing anything.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Do you drink alcohol?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Yes. Not as much as I used to. But in uni I drank frequently.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Oh shit that's not the reply I expected

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            What reply WERE you expecting then?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Like 4/5 of truecels are also teetotallers, and arrogant about it

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >truecel
            I don't know WTF that is. I'm not an "incel" of any kind. The only term I will use to describe myself is kissless dateless virgin, because that's a literal description of what I am. "Incel" is a political ideology/life philosophy which I do not subscribe to.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Yeah that's what I meant

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            No it isn't. You're accusing me of being some obscure brand of incel. I'm not an incel and I have nothing in common with those "people".

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Ok there incel

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Girls never gave me any invitations to flirt with them.
        Why are you waiting for an invitation? If you want to flirt with someone, do it.
        >Most people would say that women are supposed to give you signs of interest if they want you
        "People" aren't telling you that, coping autistic incels are.
        >Things like staring at you a lot, twirling their hair, touching your arms, or angling their legs towards you while sitting down. Well, no woman has EVER done these things towards me.
        They don't do it for most men. You are putting way too much emphasis on these "signals" and they're usually not so pronounced. What women usually do is the inverse, send loud and clear "get away from me" signals if they're NOT interested. If you expect women to blush and flutter their eyelashes at you, you need to lay off the anime.
        >They just act completely platonically towards me like they don't even acknowledge me as a man.
        And YOU act completely platonically towards THEM as you just openly admitted, by never flirting or showing any signs of interest yourself. Why should they put themselves out there like that anyway? That's your job. They are quite right to not acknowledge you as a man, because you're not acting like one. You may as well be a eunuch.
        >I literally never had any opportunities to flirt with girls because they just were never open to it.
        You probably have, but you were just too autistic to see it or too much of a pussy to act on it. Although this bit sounds familiar...I have a growing suspicion of exactly which anon this is.
        >Meanwhile, guys who never tried at all just had GFs and dates fall into their lap without doing anything.
        Yep, just who I thought. Lol frick off OP.
        And you have not done "everything right" as we just established. You did fail, but you also never tried.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Why are you waiting for an invitation?
          I don't want to be "that guy" who creeps on girls who never asked to be flirted with.

          >"People" aren't telling you that, coping autistic incels are.
          No, actual people have told me that. Some people even say that "girls usually make it obvious when they like you". No woman has ever "obviously" expressed interest in me, so I take that as a sign that no woman has ever viewed me as a romantic option.

          >What women usually do is the inverse, send loud and clear "get away from me" signals if they're NOT interested.
          I sometimes feel that women give me those "get away from me" signals. Not that they ever tell me to frick off, but sometimes I've spoken to girls and they just look completely irritated by my presence. They give short answers, don't smile, barely make eye contact, and make an excuse to go speak to someone else as soon as possible. I don't know wtf I do to deserve that shit.

          Ironically, despite being an aspie guy, I find that aspie/autistic women are even worse in this regard than any neurotypical girls. Every autist girl I ever knew has treated me like garbage. They carry an air of superiority about them, like they think I'm some peasant who would never be worthy of them.

          >And YOU act completely platonically towards THEM as you just openly admitted
          I only act platonically towards them because that's how people told me I should be. The most common advice you see given to inexperienced men is that "you need to stop putting women on a pedestal" or "you should treat them the exact same way you treat men". So that's what I do. There have been plenty of women who I thought were attractive, or enjoyed their company, or even had crushes on. And if they ever flirted with me, I'd try my best to reciprocate that interest. But they never do. So what am I supposed to do about that?

          >Although this bit sounds familiar...I have a growing suspicion of exactly which anon this is.
          Who exactly do you think I am?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I don't want to be "that guy" who creeps on girls who never asked to be flirted with.
            Then don't be creepy. Would you rather be "that guy" who never gets a woman in his life ever? Also, sometimes not flirting may be actually creepier, like when you're in a situation where it would be appropriate or even expected and you're still just...not.
            > No woman has ever "obviously" expressed interest in me,
            Well let me ask you something...why exactly why would they? Like if this is a scenario where you and the girl have never or barely talked before, why would she be expressing interest in you? What would it be based on? She doesn't know if there's any possibility of interest there, because there's been no interaction. For that matter, you don't know that either. You might think she's pretty or something, but that's not the same thing.
            >They give short answers, don't smile, barely make eye contact, and make an excuse to go speak to someone else as soon as possible.
            And how are YOU talking to them? Maybe they're irritated because you're giving them nothing to work with and are bothering them for no clear reason.
            >The most common advice you see given to inexperienced men is that "you need to stop putting women on a pedestal"
            That doesn't mean "don't flirt".
            >"you should treat them the exact same way you treat men".
            That just means don't be nervous around them while you're having a regular non-flirty or sexual conversation, but again it doesn't mean never have those conversations at all. Even then though, do you not just joke and pal around with your guy friends? That's basically all flirting is, with a few extra steps.
            >And if they ever flirted with me, I'd try my best to reciprocate that interest. But they never do. So what am I supposed to do about that?
            You're supposed to be the man and lead the situation. You won't get them all, but if you don't try you won't get any.
            >Who exactly do you think I am?
            Don't play coy with me anon, I've seen your posts many times.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Also, sometimes not flirting may be actually creepier, like when you're in a situation where it would be appropriate or even expected and you're still just...not.
            What kind of situation would that be?

            >Like if this is a scenario where you and the girl have never or barely talked before, why would she be expressing interest in you? What would it be based on?
            Couldn't it just be based on... me as a person? Why do I need to flirt in order for a girl to be interested in me? Can't she just like my personality?

            >And how are YOU talking to them?
            Normally. Like normal human beings. Talking about mutual interests, or things that were happening in our mutual social circles at the time.

            >Even then though, do you not just joke and pal around with your guy friends? That's basically all flirting is, with a few extra steps.
            Yeah, and I can joke around with girls too, but it never goes anywhere. They might laugh and seem like they enjoy my company, but it's only ever platonically.

            >Don't play coy with me anon, I've seen your posts many times.
            I ask because I don't want you to confuse me with some other moron who posts here. I HAVE indeed posted on /adv/ for many years, but due to this being an anonymous website, it would be terribly easy for you to mistake someone else's posts for being "mine".

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >Can't she just like my personality?
            You haven't displayed your personality! And when you have, it's been fake, as I outlined above.
            >Talking about mutual interests, or things that were happening in our mutual social circles at the time.
            So never any expressed interest in her, specifically? Any questions you could ask her about herself, or compliments you could give? Let me guess though, you are LE HARD STOIC MAN and that would be beneath you, right?
            >but it's only ever platonically.
            No shit, you're not flirting. There's no sexual energy.
            >it would be terribly easy for you to mistake someone else's posts for being "mine".
            It would be, but I haven't. The bit about the other guys falling ass backwards into relationships was the give away. We've danced this dance many times anon.

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Same except I’m 6’6 and not autistic

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Short guys, ugly guys, fat guys, balding guys, guys with fricked up teeth, guys with no style, guys who wear dirty clothes, autistic guys, guys with zero personality, depressive/suicidal guys. Literally everyone.
    All those guys talked to a woman at some point. Did you?

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Man, I have a similar issue, is just really weird, funniest thing is that other guys I know didn't need, hell pretty much none but me went to college and still they won't ever stay more than a few weeks with no girl, pretty wild how some people like us exist

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    [...]

    Frick off. Didn't read your post. have a nice day incel.

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No, you aren't.
    There are plenty of guys like you, it's just hard to notice them beacuse you only notice happy couples in public, you don't pay attention to the loners.
    I'm 183 cm, NSFFW, good hygine, not complete autist; and yet, turbo-virgin.
    And there are other like you and me, some of whom I know personally- richer than us, taller, smarter, more handsome, and they can't get a girl to save their life.
    So no, you aren't special

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      OP here, gonna respond to a few posts.

      >And there are other like you and me, some of whom I know personally- richer than us, taller, smarter, more handsome, and they can't get a girl to save their life.
      >So no, you aren't special
      Nope. I AM special. I don't take bullshit that people like you say on the internet as evidence of anything. I take evidence from my real life. And in my real life, I've known hundreds of men and not one of them was a kissless dateless virgin like I was. Even the guys I knew who WERE virgins at the start of university, ended up eventually getting a GF or having some one night stands.

      I am special. I am unique. Nobody else has lived the life that I have lived. Nobody else has felt the depth of pain that I feel.

      OP, do you have any hobbies or interests? If so, do you attend events related to them? Speaking from experience, your best chance by far is to meet a woman who's also on the spectrum and interested in some of the same things you are.
      You may not have social skills, but if you can keep up a conversation about her special interest, that's all an autistic woman needs to want to spend time with you. And she'll actually understand if you have to literally say something like "look, I'm not sure how to say this in a way that isn't awkward, but I think you're very cute and was wondering if you'd want to go on a date sometime?" Rather than trying to play the silly little games that neurotypicals play that involve reading subtle signals of attraction and reacting to them in the right way.

      >OP, do you have any hobbies or interests? If so, do you attend events related to them?
      Yes and yes.

      >Speaking from experience, your best chance by far is to meet a woman who's also on the spectrum
      No. I've met several autistic women over the years. They all hated me. Neurotypical women have ALWAYS been MUCH easier for me to get along with. Autistic women treat me like I'm not even worthy of being in the same room as them.

      From researching online, it seems that a lot of autistic women have a strong disdain for autistic men. Although I'm "high functioning", I believe girl autists can sense my 'tism and immediately are disgusted with me because of it.

      [...]
      Ok, I'm back.
      >I've seen plenty of women on the internet
      >on the internet
      There's mistake number one. Look, I know the internet is probably your entire frame of reference, but you need to touch grass and observe how things work in the real world. You don't even have to get involved, just watch people. Sometimes women want to be flirted with, sometimes they don't. It depends on the time and place, and it depends on the guy.
      >Yes, so have I, and I mentioned that in my OP. Which just makes it all the more depressing and confusing that I am the one and only guy who struggles this badly with women.

      Here's my thoughts: you may well be legitimately autistic (albeit high functioning), but that's not really the problem here.
      The problem here is not autism but neuroticism. These other autistic guys, who you and I have both seen, still aren't afraid to shoot their shot. They're not afraid to flirt. From what I've seen and inferred from your posts, you are both deathly afraid of rejection (or even just looking stupid) and you are not comfortable in your own skin or with your own sexuality. You get mad that women do not see you as a sexual being, but you do not present yourself as one. These other autists we know might not be the smoothest operators, but they're still more at ease when talking to women and making their intentions known than you are. Your inhibitions are what are truly holding you back here.
      Until you work on that, nothing will change. Even if you were to meet some autistic girl who is into the same whatever weird nerdy shit you are, it wouldn't matter if you couldn't express your interests and desires to her. Even autistic women still want to feel like women and want their prospective man to actually want them.

      >These other autists we know might not be the smoothest operators, but they're still more at ease when talking to women and making their intentions known than you are. Your inhibitions are what are truly holding you back here.
      Yeah, I know what you mean. Lower functioning autists don't care about looking moronic or perverted, so they just go up to girls and say fricking dumb shit, and somehow with some girls that works.

      But I can't do that. I have a reputation to maintain. I have to be cool and smooth and NEVER reveal any weakness in front of women.

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >asperger's
    Women don't like or want that.

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If you post a picture of your face, or your body, or clothes, anything really, we will more easily be able to identify the problem.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      My appearance is not the problem. Uglier, fatter, and worse-dressed men than me have gotten GFs and dates with ease.

      >Woman poster spotted
      Why would a man ever speak to a woman unless he was looking for a gf/quick frick? It's one or the other. Sorry femcel but there is no guy who will just meet you and immediately be deeply invested in learning about your thoughts and feelings.

      The social interest in any relationship comes after sexual attraction never before (except maybe with women).

      >Why would a man ever speak to a woman unless he was looking for a gf/quick frick? It's one or the other. Sorry femcel but there is no guy who will just meet you and immediately be deeply invested in learning about your thoughts and feelings.
      Sounds like you're just a homosexual. Normal straight men enjoy the company of women and like getting to know them as people.

      Not OP but
      >"Hate to just boil it down to "be yourself bro" but really, that's what it is."
      >"I'm an autistic man, I can't just "be myself", because "myself" is nerdy and awkward as frick and will make women actively repulsed from me"
      >"Than either work on yourself to be less awkward and more open and fun, or at least just own being a nerdy autist. But the hard man routine is not being yourself either."

      "Be yourself bro, but change yourself! It's just that simple dude!" There should be a law passed where people like you are dragged out and whipped for your "advice".

      Calm the frick down dipshit.

      >There should be a law passed where people like you are dragged out and whipped for your "advice".
      Ooh, got a tough guy here I see.
      If you had it in you to do that, you would also have it in you to escalate with women and wouldn't be here needing my advice.
      >b-but I said I'm not OP
      Doesn't matter, you empathize with him so clearly cut from the same cloth.

      Also, "be yourself" never, ever meant you couldn't change, or weren't supposed to change. Let alone that you were supposed to double-down on all your worst traits. It just meant you're not supposed to be fake.
      And if you actually read OP's posts, he made it clear that he is NOT being himself. He wants women, he wants them to view him as a sexual being and he wants to be able to have relations with them. But his own actions betray him. He refuses to flirt or escalate because he thinks its inappropriate or that he'll "tip them off" somehow that he's interested in them (uh...no shit?). That's why goes through the elaborate ruse of pretending he's not interested when this is actually what he wants more than anything in the world.
      I am always "myself" when I'm talking to people, women included. OP is not, OP is deeply inhibited and repressed. So yes, homosexual, "being yourself" would do OP (and likely, you) a world of good.

      >>b-but I said I'm not OP
      >Doesn't matter, you empathize with him so clearly cut from the same cloth.
      No, me and him are not in any way the same. I do not have any connection to incels or to incel ideology.

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    All the good looking women who would make great wives and mothers are taken in high school and college the latest. Whatever remains is taken shortly after they enter the workforce. There exist very few good looking (7 and above) women that are single and have a good heart, are modest, raised in a decent family, soft spoken and pretty. The window of opportunity when they are single is very very narrow. These are the 2% of women, the highest stock of females this wonderful creation can offer. If you don't frequent their circles or the events they attend you have no chance of meeting them. Women also don't go anywhere alone, so whatever hobbies women have or events they attend it is done with their husband or boyfriend and if they are single with their groups of friends.
    Boomers and gen-x are throwing money at young pussy like never before, we are talking boat trips, exotic trips, paying their rent and bills, buying them gifts, trips to beauty salons, etc. Many of them have net worths in the millions. Just look at all those modelling agencies and realize how many pretty girls are being baited to frick the rich and upper class.
    Then there are chad millennials and chad zoomers who get their first pick at all the young pussy.
    Then at the end of the line there is you anon, the average nobody with no money, no charisma, no looks, no social circle, no experiences and no toys.

    tldr; there simply aren't enough single good looking young white women to go around for everybody, they are rare and exist mostly in very niche places where men without social circles (loners) can't get in to

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Aspie woman here, I will give you my perspective.

    1. I'd only date guys based on common interests and life philosophy, starting off as friends. A man just being attractive doesn't do it for me.

    2. I wouldn't date a man who seems unsatisfied with himself, as if I am there to save him. Make yourself happy and confident first, through following your own interests in life. It shows.

    3. I am usually too shy to make the first move. If someone asked me out I may even take some time to think about it, even if I do actually like him. A guy would have way more chances if he took the first steps (in a natural pace) than waiting for me to do it, or to just happen. Of course that means being ok with rejection too.

    4. I know socially awkward guys I would never date, not because they are socially awkward but because they give off the impression that they are ready to date just about anyone. They attend social events with varying frequency dependent on how many women are expected to attend. They sit next to a different woman each time and try to befriend her. They try to find things in common but it's forced.

    5. I find awkward nerdy guys cute. If only they were being themselves. I have a hard time dating because no one is being genuine anymore. If you are being yourself, you may not attract 10 women, but just the 1 who is most suitable to you. I hope that helps.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >2. I wouldn't date a man who seems unsatisfied with himself, as if I am there to save him. Make yourself happy and confident first, through following your own interests in life. It shows.
      This is good advice, aspie femanon. This largely applies to all women.
      >If only they were being themselves.
      >If you are being yourself, you may not attract 10 women, but just the 1 who is most suitable to you.
      Oh boy, they're not gonna like this kek (see my above post). You are of course 100% correct however.

      You'll get some blowback from these gays next, IE "hurr durr don't ask a fish how to catch a fish", as if you're looking to date them or something.
      This cliche also ignores that women, unlike fish, actually want to be caught...if you're the right guy.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >1. I'd only date guys based on common interests and life philosophy, starting off as friends. A man just being attractive doesn't do it for me.
      I feel exactly the same. I have to know a girl on a personal level before I can feel properly attracted to her. Before that, I can acknowledge if she is pretty, but I won't feel any real connection.

      >2. I wouldn't date a man who seems unsatisfied with himself, as if I am there to save him.
      Women SAY this but in actuality a lot of girls don't actually give a frick. One of my best friends at uni was a guy who would have these random mental breakdowns over things and would scream at his GF saying he was "gonna kill himself" or something. I witnessed them with my own eyes a few times. Shit was scary. But somehow his GF just... didn't care? She never broke up with him and always tried to care for him. Just WTF.

      >A guy would have way more chances if he took the first steps (in a natural pace) than waiting for me to do it, or to just happen.
      I only ever asked 2 girls out in my entire life. Both were in high school. And both resulted in absolutely catastrophic rejections that made me feel pathetic, and I still cringe at those moments an ENTIRE DECADE later.

      >4. I know socially awkward guys I would never date, not because they are socially awkward but because they give off the impression that they are ready to date just about anyone. They attend social events with varying frequency dependent on how many women are expected to attend. They sit next to a different woman each time and try to befriend her. They try to find things in common but it's forced.
      None of this applies to me at all.

      >If you are being yourself, you may not attract 10 women, but just the 1 who is most suitable to you. I hope that helps.
      That's perfect. I don't want to be a "player". I don't want to attract lots of random women. I'm not even interested in casual sex. I just wish that I could be considered as a romantic option by somebody.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There really is no difference between aspie women and neurotypical women.

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Is it possible that I am just cursed by some kind of malevolent god to be romantically/sexually invisible to women for my entire life?|
    being in the same boat as you, i keep considering this more and more, as any other option or explanation has been almost completely exhausted

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >I am a special snowflake
    >No man in human history has suffered as much as I have
    You are just an entitled insufferable selfish c**t. There is nothing special about you, you chose to be an incel like a few others.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >You are just an entitled insufferable selfish c**t.
      How? Explain.

      >There is nothing special about you, you chose to be an incel like a few others.
      1. I am special. Name any other man on the planet who was cursed with the same fate I was.

      2. I'm not an incel.

      3. I didn't "choose" anything. I tried my absolute hardest to get women to like me. It didn't work. What more do you want me to do?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >I am special
        No you're not. You chose to be an incel and whine about it instead of doing what everyone else did: man up, and stop being a homosexual.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >I tried my absolute hardest to get women to like me.
        What did you try? Examples? How many girls have you asked out in the last year? How many matches on dating apps?

  17. 4 weeks ago
    Seanonymous

    It's over, Chad. The beta uprising is now old man.

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